"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

Well I haven't posted on this forum for a while but have been testing the waters off and on with SA over the past 8 months or so with some level of success. I have not yet found anything close enough to call my ATF and to convince me to be monogamous just yet, but have been with several SBs more than a few times and have to admit it is a fun and rewarding sport. Most of my contacts have been in the 19 to 26 yr old range and most have been fairly normal girls just looking for a little extra cash and a good time. But the sex has just been OK so far and nothing really good enough to post about.

One story worth sharing, however, it a young AA girl that I met almost 6 months ago now. She was just 18 then (19 now) and told me she was taking some college courses but I always thought that was a little suspicious. She never talked about school and never answered questions about her courses, always just changing the subject when I asked her about it. When we first met, she was very shy, but did not hesitate to agree to the FC on only the second date. We met off and on about every 1-2 weeks for a couple of months. At first she would allow almost anything but full penetration was almost impossible. I don't think she was a virgin, but she was certainly unexperienced and tight in every way imaginable. She gave a good BBBJ, enjoyed DATY, and really liked deep FK and making out. I was pretty smitten by her youth and innocence for the first several times that we met.

Of course, the newness of it all wore off pretty fast and after a couple of months, she was more and more obvious about just wanting some cash and ending the date as soon as possible. She finally rushed me through so fast one night that I just said F__k it and decided not to see her again. I have given in a couple of times since then, but the performance has been marginal at best and she even told me once that she "didn't suck dick anymore and really didn't like DATY anyway". I used her as only a backup for a few more months, but she continues to txt me off and on trying to continue the sugar as long as possible. She finally moved out of her mothers house to a place of her own, and each txt message is getting more and more desperate, even though its been several months now since we have seen each other. At this point, I'm pretty sure she is completely on her own. 19 years old, no means of support, and no school ambitions whatsoever. She texted me recently with this message:

"Hey- I got a new number I misss you so much lets meet up tomrrow and have fun for a couple of hours have sex eat me and ill suck your dick the whole me not liking it thing was a joke I love oral LOL but pllllleeeaassee ill even wear the pink thing you gave me. Please don't make me beg for the money I really need it right now it doesn't have to be a lot but you should help me because I'm asking and giving you something in return."

I'm running as fast as possible away from this desperate one. Too bad she went down hill so fast. She seemed like a keeper at one time.

Keep up all of the great posts. It's the first thing I read each morning.

[QUOTE=Hsrams; 1556483]Well I haven't posted on this forum for a while but have been testing the waters off and on with SA over the past 8 months or so with some level of success. I have not yet found anything close enough to call my ATF and to convince me to be monogamous just yet, but have been with several SBs more than a few times and have to admit it is a fun and rewarding sport. Most of my contacts have been in the 19 to 26 yr old range and most have been fairly normal girls just looking for a little extra cash and a good time. But the sex has just been OK so far and nothing really good enough to post about.

One story worth sharing, however, it a young AA girl that I met almost 6 months ago now. She was just 18 then (19 now) and told me she was taking some college courses but I always thought that was a little suspicious. She never talked about school and never answered questions about her courses, always just changing the subject when I asked her about it. When we first met, she was very shy, but did not hesitate to agree to the FC on only the second date. We met off and on about every 1-2 weeks for a couple of months. At first she would allow almost anything but full penetration was almost impossible. I don't think she was a virgin, but she was certainly unexperienced and tight in every way imaginable. She gave a good BBBJ, enjoyed DATY, and really liked deep FK and making out. I was pretty smitten by her youth and innocence for the first several times that we met.

Of course, the newness of it all wore off pretty fast and after a couple of months, she was more and more obvious about just wanting some cash and ending the date as soon as possible. She finally rushed me through so fast one night that I just said F__k it and decided not to see her again. I have given in a couple of times since then, but the performance has been marginal at best and she even told me once that she "didn't suck dick anymore and really didn't like DATY anyway". I used her as only a backup for a few more months, but she continues to txt me off and on trying to continue the sugar as long as possible. She finally moved out of her mothers house to a place of her own, and each txt message is getting more and more desperate, even though its been several months now since we have seen each other. At this point, I'm pretty sure she is completely on her own. 19 years old, no means of support, and no school ambitions whatsoever. She texted me recently with this message:

"Hey- I got a new number I misss you so much lets meet up tomrrow and have fun for a couple of hours have sex eat me and ill suck your dick the whole me not liking it thing was a joke I love oral LOL but pllllleeeaassee ill even wear the pink thing you gave me. Please don't make me beg for the money I really need it right now it doesn't have to be a lot but you should help me because I'm asking and giving you something in return."

I'm running as fast as possible away from this desperate one. Too bad she went down hill so fast. She seemed like a keeper at one time.

Keep up all of the great posts. It's the first thing I read each morning.[/QUOTE]I agree; keep this one out of your life. I know from experience that if you give in, they will try to squeeze every last penny out of you.

Have to stop in and say thanks to the regulars that contribute here. I have been playing the sugar game for about a year and a half. I keep adjusting my strategies based on methods other posters have used with success. The knowledge that is shared here is priceless. In the past two months I have screened 50+ real email responses from M4W sections of Craigs List. I have had 4 meet and greets. Then finally I hit pay dirt this week, having spent 3 hours in a hotel with an absolutely stunning 21 yo, blonde, blue-eyed coed. Immediately following our first M&G. This was my first sugar experience since August of 2011. I do partake in well reviewed Back page girls, and have a few numbers of girls from the street that are good for a cheap quick fix.

However, I must admit that I am enamored at the idea of finding the true SB, of being her first SD. This for me is what makes the amount of work we must put in worthwhile. It's also the reason I am extremely picky of who I choose to play with. Keep up the good work guys.

WS

[QUOTE=Hsrams; 1556483]"Hey- I got a new number I misss you so much lets meet up tomrrow and have fun for a couple of hours have sex eat me and ill suck your dick the whole me not liking it thing was a joke I love oral LOL but pllllleeeaassee ill even wear the pink thing you gave me. Please don't make me beg for the money I really need it right now it doesn't have to be a lot but you should help me because I'm asking and giving you something in return."

I'm running as fast as possible away from this desperate one. Too bad she went down hill so fast. She seemed like a keeper at one time.[/QUOTE]I don't know man. (smh) I see opportunity in desperation! And there is value in a relationship. On average it costs a business 6 to 7 times the amount to get a new customer than to retain a current one. She has indicated to you that she is ready to become your personal garden tool. It's time for a drive by. Get you dick sucked in the back seat. Force her to deep throat. Bust in her mouth. Make her swallow! Give her standard tuition for a BJ. And tell her you are only into 68 now and you owe her one! If your really ambitious, turn her out if she needs more $. As I have stated before. She will either learn a new talent or resolve to manage her personal finances better. Either way you are still getting off. Cause we in this for the pussy we don't love the ho's. Right?

She has moved from Nando 1 status to Garden Tool with internet access. Personally I don't know why there is the hate in the forum against Nando 1's. As a class they are not all bad. That is where I have gotten some of my best down and dirty action. And personally I'd rather give my money to a woman who really needs it as opposed to some rich college girl spoiled by Daddy and too lazy to get off her ass and work three jobs like I did to get through college.

As for Garden Tools, they have their purpose also. I don't like to eat in Michelin rated restaurants all of the time. Sometimes I need some junk food. And if you are dealing with a garden tool (s) with internet access simply be aware and behave accordingly. (I. E. Don't let your guard down like I did.)

We work with dangerous chemicals in our homes all the time. Bathroom cleaners, lighter fluid and gasoline are some examples. But no one would suggest that we stop grilling because some idiot blew himself up over the July 4th by spraying lighter fluid into a grill with hot coals.

SubCmdr out

[QUOTE=WoodSlinger; 1556944]Have to stop in and say thanks to the regulars that contribute here. I have been playing the sugar game for about a year and a half. I keep adjusting my strategies based on methods other posters have used with success. The knowledge that is shared here is priceless. In the past two months I have screened 50+ real email responses from M4W sections of Craigs List. I have had 4 meet and greets. Then finally I hit pay dirt this week, having spent 3 hours in a hotel with an absolutely stunning 21 yo, blonde, blue-eyed coed. Immediately following our first M&G. This was my first sugar experience since August of 2011. I do partake in well reviewed Back page girls, and have a few numbers of girls from the street that are good for a cheap quick fix.

However, I must admit that I am enamored at the idea of finding the true SB, of being her first SD. This for me is what makes the amount of work we must put in worthwhile. It's also the reason I am extremely picky of who I choose to play with. Keep up the good work guys.

WS[/QUOTE]Brother Woodster (we already have a "Woody" - GuyWoodson) ,

Let me be the first of many to welcome you to the clubhouse. As you have already experienced, this is not the hobby for the corner-cutters nor the place to achieve quick results. They are an elusive and quixotic breed, these sugar babies, but if you are fortunate enough to land one, or two, the rewards are worth ten times the effort. Scroll back through the entire thread, take what advice you feel relevant, and leave the rest. Everyone on here has contributed valuable advice, gleaned from personal experience and hard work, so no one's comments should be dismissed lightly.

I think you will find that anyone here will be more than happy to share information and experieces with you, including our den baby, Mandy.

Good luck to you, and don't forget to write.

Scott

This thread has the second lowest pics to posts ratio except some Honolulu mp thread. Its like. 02. Can't we see some g rated face slightly hidden pics? Please

[QUOTE=WoodSlinger; 1556944]However, I must admit that I am enamored at the idea of finding the true SB, of being her first SD. This for me is what makes the amount of work we must put in worthwhile. It's also the reason I am extremely picky of who I choose to play with. Keep up the good work guys.

WS[/QUOTE]This is what I live for. But in between there are lot of fun interviews with non repeaters. I love being the first sd, first white guy, first kinky sex, first multiple o, and on and on.

Chatted w / this 22 yrs Brunette for several days. We were both eager to meet. M&G turned into dinner date. I did ask her "did you read my profile?" She looked at me and said "yes". Had great time. Lot of touching and hugging. After dinner, she started asking me about "you married?". I said,"yes as mentioned in the profile. You knew this before coming out, correct?".

She was then telling me that she has a high moral standard, blah blah blah. Then, she said that I can't have sex with you, but I like you and want to see you more. As being a gentlemen (or gentle-dog) , I told her that this is mutual relationship and if she does not want, so be it. (said it in very polite way). I did express my disappointment that we should not even meet if she has such mortal issue. She told me that she really wants to see me.

I pretty much took her back to her car (with some chatting w / her. Blah blah blah) and drive out as fast as my engine can.

P. S: Sub-Cmdr gave me a lecture that such SB pot are "conflicted SB". There will be others like that. (thank you, Cmdr)

Dog is still in "Cadet" level.

[QUOTE=HollywoodGuy;1557548]This thread has the second lowest pics to posts ratio except some Honolulu mp thread. Its like. 02.[/QUOTE]I don't think that lack as in any way a shortcoming.

[QUOTE=HollywoodGuy;1557548]Can't we see some g rated face slightly hidden pics? Please[/QUOTE]Not to say some might be willing to do so, or have SBs that wouldn't mind the exposure, but in my own case, there's no fvcking way I'm posting a picture of my one and only sugar baby. I don't even have one on my phone. I've spent a long time with her, and doing that would, IMO, be a violation of the trust we've built up. I will [i]not [/i]disparage those who do post such, but my belief is that, for many potential sugar daddies, the hoped-for nature of a SB relationship pretty much precludes the posting of pictures on a public sex oriented web site.

Just my two cents.

[noparse]/[/noparse]z

[QUOTE=Hsrams; 1556483]One story worth sharing, however, it a young AA girl that I met almost 6 months ago now. She was just 18 then (19 now) and told me she was taking some college courses but I always thought that was a little suspicious. She never talked about school and never answered questions about her courses, always just changing the subject when I asked her about it. When we first met, she was very shy, but did not hesitate to agree to the FC on only the second date. We met off and on about every 1-2 weeks for a couple of months. At first she would allow almost anything but full penetration was almost impossible. I don't think she was a virgin, but she was certainly unexperienced and tight in every way imaginable. She gave a good BBBJ, enjoyed DATY, and really liked deep FK and making out. I was pretty smitten by her youth and innocence for the first several times that we met.

Of course, the newness of it all wore off pretty fast and after a couple of months, she was more and more obvious about just wanting some cash and ending the date as soon as possible. She finally rushed me through so fast one night that I just said F__k it and decided not to see her again. I have given in a couple of times since then, but the performance has been marginal at best and she even told me once that she "didn't suck dick anymore and really didn't like DATY anyway". I used her as only a backup for a few more months, but she continues to txt me off and on trying to continue the sugar as long as possible. She finally moved out of her mothers house to a place of her own, and each txt message is getting more and more desperate, even though its been several months now since we have seen each other. At this point, I'm pretty sure she is completely on her own. 19 years old, no means of support, and no school ambitions whatsoever. She texted me recently with this message:

"Hey- I got a new number I misss you so much lets meet up tomrrow and have fun for a couple of hours have sex eat me and ill suck your dick the whole me not liking it thing was a joke I love oral LOL but pllllleeeaassee ill even wear the pink thing you gave me. Please don't make me beg for the money I really need it right now it doesn't have to be a lot but you should help me because I'm asking and giving you something in return."

I'm running as fast as possible away from this desperate one. Too bad she went down hill so fast. She seemed like a keeper at one time.

Keep up all of the great posts. It's the first thing I read each morning.[/QUOTE]Obviously, if you're not getting what you want out of a relationship, then it's pointless to pursue it. However, I kinda of agree with SubCmdr on this one. If her hunger makes her willing to go back to the way it was, were it me, I might give her another shot, even telling her up straight up that you really liked the way it was when you first met, and the reason you stopped seeing her was because she stopped doing the things you like and that she apparently stopped having fun, and that that's not the type of relationship you want.

Before I met the girl I'm seeing now, I spent a lot of years chasing strippers, and still do sometimes, albeit with much less frequency, and what your girl has done here sounds like what every money hungry stripper does, suck you in (sometimes literally) with high performance, and then drop off as long as the sugar keeps coming. When the sugar falls off, one of two things happens. Either she drops you like a hot potato and moves on to the next PL, or she ramps it up again. The girls who do the latter can sometimes be worth it.

Of course, if she's now lying about having lied about not liking that stuff, and is just going through the motions to get your money, it might [i]not [/i]be worth it, but that's something you have to judge for yourself.

[noparse]/[/noparse]z

[QUOTE=JoesParty; 1555576]"Why can't you? Do you have a wife at home?"

She apparently had not carefully read my SA profile, which clearly says "married, but looking." She was visibly disappointed, and it was suddenly very chilly in the car. I see no point in lying to babies about this, and it would be hard to keep up the charade anyway. She politely thanked me for dinner and was on her way.

[snipped]

What should I do in the future to avoid this type of misunderstanding? Obviously, close the deal! But beside that, I'm thinking I need to ensure the pot is aware I'm married and is ok with that. How do you guys handle this? Because it's never been a problem for me before.[/QUOTE][QUOTE=John G Smith;1556242]Even still I generally believe in full disclosure when it comes to this. I need the SB on day one to understand the need for discretion. By mentioning these things in my profile, I generally get responses from SBs who are already prepared for a "Behind Closed Doors" arrangement. Also they would figure it out that I'm married/attached pretty soon when I never answer their voice calls, never invite them to my place, or by my very restrictive schedule. And believe it or not I don't like lying, so I try to keep it to a minimum. I think an arrangement is less stressful when both parties know exactly what they're dealing with.[/QUOTE]I agree completely with being upfront about being married. In my dealings with strippers and other providers, I've never been shy about answering "yes" to the question of whether I'm married, and probably for much the same reasons, it gets it out of the way, and I don't like lying. And for any who might consider that statement hypocritical, I can only advise you to check your premises and preconceptions.

My SB knew shortly after we met, and long before we started anything sexual, that I was married, and happily so. It's actually one of the reasons she considers me "safe", because there's no danger of me leaving my wife and showing up on her doorstep. She doesn't want me for a boyfriend (even the one she has, she never calls "boyfriend") and I'm completely uninterested in an emotional relationship of the type I have with my wife. I personally think that's why it's lasted so long. Neither of us wants anything from each other except for exactly what we're getting.

[noparse]/[/noparse]z

The irony is in re: these Babies who have moral qualms about sleeping with a Daddy who is married don't have any problem fucking the unmarried ones for money. Go figure? This is truly selective morality.

"Selective Morality". Yes. My last night SB did say,"sometimes I don't give a fuck about my moral level"."but I can't have sex w / married men". WTF.

[QUOTE=Hernando;1557807]The irony is in re: these Babies who have moral qualms about sleeping with a Daddy who is married don't have any problem fucking the unmarried ones for money. Go figure? This is truly selective morality.[/QUOTE]

I firmly believe that most of the babies who balk at married daddies while happily sleeping with unmarried ones (and I've known married women who fall into that category too) do so because what they're *really* looking for is a white knight, not a benefactor. If you're looking to be a white knight, that's fine... but if all you want is to have an open-ended casual connection, such "damsels in distress" end up being more trouble than they're worth.

[QUOTE=John G Smith; 1556242]Timely post. I actually planned to talk about this very subject.

On my SA profile I clearly state I'm married and within the actual text of the profile I mention it again and that I'm looking for a "discreet" relationship. This definitely cuts down on the responses I receive. Some SBs have a problem with it morally or they're worried about the possible drama, which might come their way. Also I've noticed Asian SBs tend to be more reluctant to see married men than most in my experience.

Even still I generally believe in full disclosure when it comes to this. I need the SB on day one to understand the need for discretion. By mentioning these things in my profile, I generally get responses from SBs who are already prepared for a "Behind Closed Doors" arrangement. Also they would figure it out that I'm married / attached pretty soon when I never answer their voice calls, never invite them to my place, or by my very restrictive schedule. And believe it or not I don't like lying, so I try to keep it to a minimum. I think an arrangement is less stressful when both parties know exactly what they're dealing with.

That said, I am running an experiment on SD4Me. I'm saying I'm divorced on my profile to hopefully improve the initial response rate and to avoid the marriage predators. Then once I begin discussions, I mention I'm in the "process" of getting divorced so things aren't finalized and I still need to be somewhat discreet.

The downside to disclosing you're married is that it opens you up to blackmail by psychos. After my recent psycho experience earlier this month, I'm trying to figure out if there is a different approach to handling this. A way to explain the need for discretion while also avoiding SBs thinking they have the "I'm going to tell your wife!" card in their back pocket.

Tricky stuff.[/QUOTE]I've noticed the same regarding some Asian SB's having a reluctance to go out with married guys. Mostly Koreans and those from the Phillipines in my experience. My SB for the last seven months is a Korean sophmore attending a University in my city. She has a few other friends besides me. She tells me that she sees only unmarried guys, either single or divorced. I have been married more than once. With out lying I let her know that I was married in the past. I say what is the difference if one is or is not married. The SB is getting the $, gifts, and bills paid that she wants. She has absolutely no intention of ever going out with me other than as a SB. I do not know her friends, etc. She doesn't know mine. She is not looking for companionship from me only Louis Vuitton bags etc. I get to have a 19 yr old to sleep with 2 or 3 times a week. We are both happy in our own way.