"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

[QUOTE=ErnestLl;4074102]I can't tell you the number of 20 somethings who are quite happy to tell me they are comfortable getting naked with a man 2 x their age because men under 30 are clueless losers.[/QUOTE]I am currently at a factor of 3.5 times the age of some of the newer SB's. If I lived in Nevada it would be 4 x their age. Forget about the clueless losers (certainly a factor). A certain type of young girl is not going to see a 25-30 year old male as a Daddy figure, but just as a somewhat older guy.

You will find that the older you get the easier it will be to attract these girls assuming you have the prerequisite characteristics they are looking for. Take care of your looks and be in control of basically everything. Reward them when they do what they are told and punish them when they don't. The best girls will always be good, so you will have to punish them on a regular basis (mostly in the FC) just to satisfy their need to be subservient and to get the praise they so desperately crave.

This may be physical or emotional (and I am not talking about pimp style beatings here). It's about becoming a loving Dom.

While our culture of absentee fathers is a factor, look for the girls that grew up with just a bad father, the type that doesn't really understand or support them (even though they are physically present). They have been trying to get their attention for years. Many of the girls that have had absentee fathers have already created the coping skills needed to help counter the loss of guidance & approval. But the ones with the present but negligent fathers never have and they are still vainly trying to get that support.

When you have achieved what is know as "transference", you will have everything you are looking for (if what you crave is a good little girl that wants to please her Daddy). For me this is a lifestyle. I only live in the DD/lg world. While this may not be for everyone, I believe that certain aspects of it are what most of the guys on this thread are looking for.

Do I fuck UTR's and just regular vanilla type girls? Well yes I do, (especially if they are curious about the lifestyle). But the best sex and most satisfying relationships will always keep me searching for the next "new little girl".

Seems my poor judgement from a few weeks ago in agreeing to hook up with the rather desperate 30-something has resolved itself. She in this weird mode this week of complaining that her bank balance was negative, when could we meet, etc. When I told her that Saturday night (tonight) was the best I could do (and at that point I was mostly agreeing out of charity-not a good dynamic), I outlined a pretty reasonable, typical SD / SB date. She responded by asking for more since it would be a longer date, and I held my line on the financials. So she then said instead we could keep it down to 1-1/2 hours. At that point I stopped, and later that night when I knew she'd be asleep I texted her that I was sorry but it wasn't working for me.

The weird thing was while this was happening, she was showing that she hadn't been online for a couple of days on SA. You'd think with that level of desperation she'd be digging like crazy. But three days later no response, and in the interim I unfavorited her and deleted our message trail. An SA search that normally would have her appear in the list now shows nothing, even back two weeks. Either I've been blocked or she gave up. Fine with me either way.

The GPS girl I hit does show up in that search, and she hasn't been online for three days. I guess the guys aren't beating down her door to pay her non-negotiable allowance after all. It just kills me that these girls don't understand the bird-in-the-hand rule. I would have been ok with 3, but only as an experiment, as even a reduced-rate GPS girl is probably not going to be a bucket-list experience. But she wouldn't budge, so she's got $0 coming in. And she hasn't tried to contact me at all, which is fine as I'd prefer to avoid the hassle of explicitly cutting them off.

I'm learning to read my own reactions to these situations. Both of these had me stressed out while I was working them, and once I cut them off I felt a huge relief. Which is how I know I did the right thing.

[QUOTE=HollywoodGuy;4075572]I am currently at a factor of 3.5 times the age of some of the newer SB's. If I lived in Nevada it would be 4 x their age. Forget about the clueless losers (certainly a factor). A certain type of young girl is not going to see a 25-30 year old male as a Daddy figure, but just as a somewhat older guy.

While our culture of absentee fathers is a factor, look for the girls that grew up with just a bad father, the type that doesn't really understand or support them (even though they are physically present). They have been trying to get their attention for years. Many of the girls that have had absentee fathers have already created the coping skills needed to help counter the loss of guidance & approval. But the ones with the present but negligent fathers never have and they are still vainly trying to get that support.

When you have achieved what is know as "transference", you will have everything you are looking for (if what you crave is a good little girl that wants to please her Daddy). For me this is a lifestyle. I only live in the DD/lg world. While this may not be for everyone, I believe that certain aspects of it are what most of the guys on this thread are looking for..[/QUOTE]I edited your post for brevity. Are there tells you can use to identify this in POTs? Either in their profile, or a question you can ask in your early messaging on SA?

[QUOTE=JZLizard;4074974]College aged girls have had to deal with this Generation-Z syndrome where the guys they know fall into specific buckets -- they guys they meet either grew up with "special snowflake syndrome", or they are an outright drug-addled moron. Add to that the "gender confusion" movement, where young males are penalized by the media for behaving like men or any other display of true masculinity. Movies, social media, even modern video games, more and more, are starting to portray women as not only the intellectually superior gender, but also the PHYSICALLY superior gender (I'll come back to this). Producers of this media are increasingly gay males (who could give a fuck one way or the other as long as there is enough shock value to sell tickets), so they create this fictitious image of bad-ass women, who go around karate-kicking and back-flipping their way out of fights with men carrying assault rifles.

While that kind of shit might strike a chord with a 12 year old girl, an 18-22 whose hormones and sex drive are starting to really kick in has usually had enough. I said I would come back to the statement above. While all of that sci-fi media portrayal shit is great for kids, these girls (who, as we know, DO mature emotionally faster than males) get to a point where the fiction isn't good enough anymore and they want something real. I hate to sound like Charlie Sheen here (LOL). But honestly I think the Gen-X male is "winning" from all of this if they possess the right characteristics.


So basically, the next time you unload your wad deep into some college girl, take a moment to step back and thank the proponents of the ERA movement of the 70's. I know I can say without question, their actions, more than anyone, have blessed my life with unlimited access to prime quality pussy.[/QUOTE]The attempts by popular culture an the media to make Toxic Masculinity the Scourge of the source of all planetary ills is certainly clearing the field of age appropriate competitors. Another reason SBs turn to the lifestyle, they want to deal with a real man. And its not just the young ones. I had a 40 yo MILF mom of two, who managed a store for a national brand tell me. "All day long, I'm mom or the boss and everyone is always after me to do something or decide something. Sometimes I just want to let go and let someone else decide things for me and just let myself go and escape responsibility by being someone's fuck toy".

Whether its Daddy issues or submissive nature or desire to experiment, POTs pretty much pre-screen themselves as open to hair pulling, spanking, dirty talk and much of kinkdom.

And yes. So many have Daddy issues -- loser or absent father, adopted girls, products of ugly divorce.

And let's not forget to thank Bill Clinton for telling young women every where its cool to blow the older more powerful successful guys. Just don't let the world find out. Google Dennis Miller bit on the Lewinsky scandal and its easily adaptable to charming an on the fence SB. Basically -- its not often you get the chance to lodge in your noggin the johnson of some guy who can open doors to a world you never imagined experiencing. So I say go for it.

[QUOTE=FarFarAway;4075629]I edited your post for brevity. Are there tells you can use to identify this in POTs? Either in their profile, or a question you can ask in your early messaging on SA?[/QUOTE]Your profile should definitely lean towards an easy identification that you are dominant and prefer submissive, but without ever using those words. Half the girls that respond will be doing so just for that reason. Thats probably an easy place to start. I have found there is never a way to shortcut the interviewing process. Thats when the real truth about who they really are will be revealed. Generally speaking, stay away from the ones the talk about how kinky they are. Thats just a way to jack up the allowance. The ones that use words like shy or quiet. The ones with short profiles. The ones that just have normal pictures. They are not really going to flaunt it. The ones saying they are looking for new experiences, a real connection, treated like a princess, use words like baby girl. Its far too nuanced to write a book on it.

Your first trip to the FC will tell you all you need to know. Thats when you just put it all out there. And they will either be receptive or they won't.

[QUOTE=HollywoodGuy;4075958]Your profile should definitely lean towards an easy identification that you are dominant and prefer submissive, but without ever using those words. Half the girls that respond will be doing so just for that reason. Thats probably an easy place to start. I have found there is never a way to shortcut the interviewing process. Thats when the real truth about who they really are will be revealed. Generally speaking, stay away from the ones the talk about how kinky they are. Thats just a way to jack up the allowance. The ones that use words like shy or quiet. The ones with short profiles. The ones that just have normal pictures. They are not really going to flaunt it. The ones saying they are looking for new experiences, a real connection, treated like a princess, use words like baby girl. Its far too nuanced to write a book on it.

Your first trip to the FC will tell you all you need to know. Thats when you just put it all out there. And they will either be receptive or they won't.[/QUOTE]Got it. That is exactly what I wanted to know. My profile is a little more 'nice guy' than yours I'd wager, but I can definitely identify those other items. I also don't have my profile available to search, too risky. I think submissive girls are so common on the site, I always inquire at some point, especially the M&G, if 'you are the type of woman who likes her man to be in the lead'. It implies what I want but isn't so blatant that a non-sub would be offended. Often I get the reply 'oh, yes, I'm submissive'.

I learned a new term recently. ABG is asian baby girl, they're subs.

[QUOTE=FarFarAway;4076548]Got it. That is exactly what I wanted to know. My profile is a little more 'nice guy' than yours I'd wager, but I can definitely identify those other items. I also don't have my profile available to search, too risky. I think submissive girls are so common on the site, I always inquire at some point, especially the M&G, if 'you are the type of woman who likes her man to be in the lead'. It implies what I want but isn't so blatant that a non-sub would be offended. Often I get the reply 'oh, yes, I'm submissive'.

I learned a new term recently. ABG is asian baby girl, they're subs.[/QUOTE]Princesses and baby girls. Gotta love "em.

To curry favor w / a POT. Be sure to send a 'Christmas card' to any girl you've got any interest in or had a good time with. You can dig up Christmas scenes that are animated gifs on the web, they go fine via text.

So I am currently on some civvy sites. I am trying to date. I also hobby until then. I just found out that three of my former SB are now in relationships. I wonder, how the hell do SB get into relationships and I am still singel LOL. I wonder if their SO would still date them if they found out their GF used to be escorts. LOL.

I am relatively new to SA though I have had some limited success there.

Several things I have been thinking about and I am interested in others opinions or experiences based on what you have observed. So what are your thoughts on when a person favorites you? I am talking about local not someone from another country. I assume it means that person has read your profile and they have some interest in at least chatting. But then I think, why didn't they just message you and say hello, check out my profile and message me back if you want to chat. Just curious as to your thoughts on what message is it they are trying to convey.

If you favorite someone, what message are you trying to convey to that person?

I have chosen not to complete anything in regard to my annual income or net worth. The main reason is while I understand that is an important part of the deal, I don't really want that to be the main reason someone reaches out to you or responds to you. Interested to know if most people complete that, if so how honest about it are you and how important do you think it is as part of your profile.

I don't have any pictures posted on my profile because of discretion. Absolutely could not have pictures of my face floating around on line. I know that when I am looking at SA, I really don't pay much attention to profiles with no picture and I am wondering if that is the same situation with SB's. Just curious about peoples thoughts and opinions.

Hopefully this post will spark some good conversation that is helpful and informative for all.

[QUOTE=RappaHannock;4079211]I am relatively new to SA though I have had some limited success there.

Several things I have been thinking about and I am interested in others opinions or experiences based on what you have observed. So what are your thoughts on when a person favorites you? I am talking about local not someone from another country. I assume it means that person has read your profile and they have some interest in at least chatting. But then I think, why didn't they just message you and say hello, check out my profile and message me back if you want to chat. Just curious as to your thoughts on what message is it they are trying to convey.

If you favorite someone, what message are you trying to convey to that person?

I have chosen not to complete anything in regard to my annual income or net worth. The main reason is while I understand that is an important part of the deal, I don't really want that to be the main reason someone reaches out to you or responds to you. Interested to know if most people complete that, if so how honest about it are you and how important do you think it is as part of your profile.

I don't have any pictures posted on my profile because of discretion. Absolutely could not have pictures of my face floating around on line. I know that when I am looking at SA, I really don't pay much attention to profiles with no picture and I am wondering if that is the same situation with SB's. Just curious about peoples thoughts and opinions.

Hopefully this post will spark some good conversation that is helpful and informative for all.[/QUOTE]Most of the local ones that favorite me have NOT read my profile. Most are UTR or escorts. Some are brand new and just click on those hearts for fun I think. I can't remember ever having one that favorited me ever lead to a M&G. I have seen a few that I have messaged and we have started a conversation that later favorite me. I assume that is because they have a lot of messages and need a way to track the ones they like the most.

I rarely favorite anyone as I prefer to just go ahead and message them. My best luck in December has been with women who have age range up to 60 listed as I am showing 57 on my current profile. I can pass for younger than that as I stay in shape and barely have any gray in my blonde hair. No public pic and the private one is long distance. They only get closeup if we are texting and headed to a meet up.

[QUOTE=JustLonely;4079262]Most of the local ones that favorite me have NOT read my profile. Most are UTR or escorts. Some are brand new and just click on those hearts for fun I think. I can't remember ever having one that favorited me ever lead to a M&G. I have seen a few that I have messaged and we have started a conversation that later favorite me. I assume that is because they have a lot of messages and need a way to track the ones they like the most.

I rarely favorite anyone as I prefer to just go ahead and message them. My best luck in December has been with women who have age range up to 60 listed as I am showing 57 on my current profile. I can pass for younger than that as I stay in shape and barely have any gray in my blonde hair. No public pic and the private one is long distance. They only get closeup if we are texting and headed to a meet up.[/QUOTE]I'm about to flake / blow-off a M&G that only got to the point of semi-arranged (that I only had about 10% of her focus was one clue, hence "semi- The bigger clue and the commonality is that neither POT wanted access to my private photos, which have more informative face pics. So they want to meet without actually seeing me (my public one has my face obscured due to the composition of the shot)? Big red flag, one that's about to be a big filter for me.

You are asking some good questions. Let me add my thoughts here. I have been using SA for just over a year (on and off). During that period, I have met well over 50 girls, and took about 30 girls to FC. I think my success rate is reasonable given that I am over 50. More than half the number of girls that I took to FC are in 18-22 yr range. Mostly college girls. I should say that sugar dating is not for the weak-hearted. If you want to score genuine SBs, you have to take some risks with out compromising your identity. My first SA profile had no photo, I was adamant not to send any photos to girls. All I attracted were escorts. No genuine SB is going to meet you without having an idea how you look like. Every time I renewed SA membership I corrected all my information in my profile as accurate as possible and added more photos (or sent photos via text or kik). I began to get response and interest from genuine SBs I am after and more and more FC visits with these girls. I firmly believe that having a profile photo makes the response rate go up. When I view girls on SA I immediately relate my thoughts to her profile photo. I am sure these girls do the same. These girls get lots of messages, you have to stand out and make them remember you. My public profile photo is a unique one at a unique angle without the face and without revealing my identity. In my profile, I say I expect discretion but happy to share more photos after chat. That way they get more confidence that I am genuine.

In my experience, when a girl favorited me without a message, it doesn't mean anything. So far I was not successful hitting FC with a girl who just favorited me without a message. I ignore them. I have my true income info on site, that way they know what I can afford and what I can't. Gold diggers are not going to come after me. Believe me or not, most of these genuine SBs appreciate honesty and straightforwardness.

Hope this helps. Everyone has his own way of approaching girls. Depends on what you are after. I am after college girl types with reasonable allowance, and my approach seems to be working so far as I am getting the desired results.

Good luck and play safe.

Dr. S.

[QUOTE=RappaHannock;4079211]I am relatively new to SA though I have had some limited success there.

Several things I have been thinking about and I am interested in others opinions or experiences based on what you have observed. So what are your thoughts on when a person favorites you? I am talking about local not someone from another country. I assume it means that person has read your profile and they have some interest in at least chatting. But then I think, why didn't they just message you and say hello, check out my profile and message me back if you want to chat. Just curious as to your thoughts on what message is it they are trying to convey.

If you favorite someone, what message are you trying to convey to that person?

I have chosen not to complete anything in regard to my annual income or net worth. The main reason is while I understand that is an important part of the deal, I don't really want that to be the main reason someone reaches out to you or responds to you. Interested to know if most people complete that, if so how honest about it are you and how important do you think it is as part of your profile.

I don't have any pictures posted on my profile because of discretion. Absolutely could not have pictures of my face floating around on line. I know that when I am looking at SA, I really don't pay much attention to profiles with no picture and I am wondering if that is the same situation with SB's. Just curious about peoples thoughts and opinions.

Hopefully this post will spark some good conversation that is helpful and informative for all.[/QUOTE]

Contrary to general consensus, I am having more success and less headache lately with younger SBs (18-22 yr) than older ones (25-35). Almost all my SBs that I hit FC in last 4 months are in 18-22 range. They are either extremely flaky and GPS or DTF. Nothing in between. Actually less drama than older SBs. When I hit FC with them it is always a blast. I can easily detect GPS, but flaky is hard to figure out, I guess I have to get better at detecting clues. My problem with older SBs (25-35), they over-analyze everything, they want to know all about me. It is more like a relationship than an arrangement. I really don't want to deal with that. With younger girls, if you manage them to show up for the date, the rest is easy. Are you guys having the same experience, or I am wondering it is how I approach them?

Stay Safe.

Dr. S.

[QUOTE=DrSummer;4079776]Contrary to general consensus, I am having more success and less headache lately with younger SBs (18-22 yr) than older ones (25-35). Almost all my SBs that I hit FC in last 4 months are in 18-22 range. They are either extremely flaky and GPS or DTF. Nothing in between. Actually less drama than older SBs. When I hit FC with them it is always a blast. I can easily detect GPS, but flaky is hard to figure out, I guess I have to get better at detecting clues. My problem with older SBs (25-35), they over-analyze everything, they want to know all about me. It is more like a relationship than an arrangement. I really don't want to deal with that. With younger girls, if you manage them to show up for the date, the rest is easy. Are you guys having the same experience, or I am wondering it is how I approach them?

Stay Safe.

Dr. S.[/QUOTE]I'd say it's just a matter of brain development plus life experience. The executive function matures around 22-24, and then at that point the older SB's are gaining more life experience, and develop a different perspective. The 18-22's are still more impulsive, have very short time horizons, limited risk assessment, etc. So when you get a good one in the younger crowd, they are more likely to take your lead without applying a lot of analytical skills to the equation. Benefits / negatives to both dynamics, all depends on what you're looking for.