Printable View
[QUOTE=CantWinLosin;3940792]I had the exact same exchange scenario with her, right down to the cut&pasted spiel about 300 at the end of the first date for the second. I told her sorry, while I generally give a gift card at the M&G, I never pre-pay in any fashion, and that if that made her feel too much like a hooker, sorry. She thanked me and disappeared.[/QUOTE]I got the same message. I didn't even respond. Surprised you got a thank you.
Hey guys, long time no post. It's been a hell of a five years, but I'm actively back in the all-but-unrecognizable bowl. What a difference five years makes.
Between the rampant GPS of the Boston area, the slim pickin's of SNH where I'm based, and the surreal warping of SA to dodge a FOSTA bullet, I'm finding this brave new world even trickier to navigate than before. Compounded by the fact that I'm not running a numbers game: I'm being choosy and trying to find an SB with long-term potential but who isn't absurdly expensive.
I also signed up for Secret Benefits, which is a smaller, slower-moving pond in my limited experience. I've only established contact with one potential so far, despite the fact that a lot of the time it's the SB's who initiate the conversation. Most of the time it simply goes nowhere. But the one I got traction with seemed promising. I was mostly intrigued because she's in the same town as my unicorn-of-yore, similar situation, similar age, and I can bring many of the same mentoring benefits to the table as I did the first time around. Pictures looked promising, her profile is a little in-your-face, but it's one of those profiles where they are trying to keep the losers at bay. It does have the "I know what I'm worth" red flag, which I initially decide to ignore.
After sending her a strong opener message, she immediately expresses interest and switches to text. Which is the phase where I prefer to try to scope out at least a little bit of chemistry before a next step. But trying to have a conversation that goes beyond 4-5 messages before she drops off for 12-18 hours is all but impossible. (there seems to be a growing category of SA girls who do this as well) Which means the only way to really figure out if there's anything worth pursuing is fast-forwarding to the NSA meet. Since I've also got a strong potential I'm talking to from SA, I propose that we meet sooner than later so that I can see if this is worth a course-correction.
That's where she springs the gem that all her dates are PPM. To which I tell her that I've structured past arrangements that way, among other possibilities. But that the first meet is NSA in order for both parties to determine chemistry and to explore what arrangement (if any) will work best. She comes back with that PPM is in place for every meet, including her initial ones, and they've all worked out pleasantly. And, get this: "I've never left my daddies empty-handed".
But this girl claims to be 18, in school, and just landed a part time job. Yet the way she talks you'd think she's been sugaring for years. The only thing that makes sense is I'm dealing with one hell of a bluff, and perhaps a young-but-savvy rinser. What makes even less sense is that she's in an area that's not exactly teeming with SD demographics, so I wonder how she's possibly finding a lot of overstuffed wallets.
You're all thinking: "this sounds familiar, just walk. " Which is likely what I'll do. Like I'm going to drive 40 minutes to treat an 18 year-old I've never met to a nice dinner, invest the scarce commodity that is my time and focus, plus pay for the privilege?
Long, strange trip.
[QUOTE=Walruscl;3941969]But this girl claims to be 18, in school, and just landed a part time job. Yet the way she talks you'd think she's been sugaring for years. [/QUOTE]I met one SB who said she'd been on the site since she was 16, so it's possible. But I've also seen a lot of girls whose profile says they're 18 but their username says otherwise. E. g. There are three 18 year olds on the first page of search results for me, and their usernames are ashylnbaker00, simone2000, and taybae97. I'd bet anything that taybae97 is actually 21 but has figured out that 18 is the best age to be on the site.
[QUOTE=Walruscl;3941969]Like I'm going to drive 40 minutes to treat an 18 year-old I've never met to a nice dinner, invest the scarce commodity that is my time and focus, plus pay for the privilege?[/QUOTE]Why not? It sounds like your last SB relationship lasted five years, right?. The risk / reward analysis seems clear to me. That is, the risk that she ghosts you and your money was wasted is minor compared to the reward if she turns out to be a great SB for the next five years.
[QUOTE=Walruscl;3941969]Hey guys, long time no post. It's been a hell of a five years, but I'm actively back in the all-but-unrecognizable bowl. What a difference five years makes.
Between the rampant GPS of the Boston area, the slim pickin's of SNH where I'm based, [/QUOTE]I can confirm that the area has countless SD's fighting for the same trickle of girls. This leads to the rampant GPS and flaking as you would expect. It's hard to establish a rapport when she's literally being peppered with new messages by the minute. The numbers used to favor the men but not anymore. SA tries hard to make it sound like a heaven for men but I can guarantee you that in our area it is now in fact a complete sausage fest.
[QUOTE=Zcochran00;3939986]I'm a programmer, and I spend a good portion of my time doing web development. I've noted that SA has been rewriting portions of their site from a traditional "click link, wait for server return the new page" style to a "single-page application" approach. Turns out that due to some rather silly programming choices on their part, it's actually possible to view the text content of messages even if you don't have premium time enabled.
It involves opening up your browser's "development tools" window so you can inspect the contents of the page and the data being requested, and should work in either Chrome or Firefox.
Log in to SA and go to your inbox. Right-click anywhere on the page and choose "Inspect Element". The browser's dev tools should either pop up as a separate window, or as part of the main window. Click on the "network" tab in the dev tools. Then, back in the SA inbox screen, click on a conversation.
If you go back to the "network" tab, you should see a list of all the data requests the SA page asked for from the server. One of them should look like "/ inbox? Page=1&limit=25". Click on that one. It'll show a bunch of technical details of some of the message headers.
Now, look for a tab called "Response". If you click on that, you should see a tree with sections like "status", "message", "conversation", and "metadata". Expand "conversation" "messages" "data". You should see some numbered entries, 0 and up. Those represent each of the messages in the conversation, from both of you. (Side note: the "metadata" object has a whole bunch of info that they know about your own account. Some of it is info you entered yourself, like profile info. There's also things like "payments_total", which appears to be how much you've actually ever paid SA, unread message count, whether you're in the EU, and even fields labeled "has_under_age_punishment" and "has_unacknowledged_punishment". Very interesting.)
Each message entry has a field called "body", which is the text that's shown in your inbox. If you've got premium active, it's the actual message text. If not, it's "Upgrade to read".
Here's where they did something silly. They send back the text that should be shown, but *they also send back the original text too*. So, even if the "body" field says "Upgrade to read", the "original_body" field shows the actual no-kidding message that was sent. You can inspect each of the messages that was received, and effectively read the conversation.
[/QUOTE]On the Epic browser, this falls down for me at the point where he says 'you should see a tree' - I don't see a tree, it is just one string of characters w / o a line feed, so you can't see everything. I have searched for 'body' within that window and in some cases found the text the POT sent, but it's really tough.
[QUOTE=EvilTmp;3942213]I can confirm that the area has countless SD's fighting for the same trickle of girls. This leads to the rampant GPS and flaking as you would expect. It's hard to establish a rapport when she's literally being peppered with new messages by the minute. The numbers used to favor the men but not anymore. SA tries hard to make it sound like a heaven for men but I can guarantee you that in our area it is now in fact a complete sausage fest.[/QUOTE]Sausage fest or not, deals are still there to be had simply because 90% don't know how to talk to a non pro on a level that makes her comfortable.
[QUOTE=FarFarAway;3942469]On the Epic browser, this falls down for me at the point where he says 'you should see a tree' - I don't see a tree, it is just one string of characters w / o a line feed, so you can't see everything. I have searched for 'body' within that window and in some cases found the text the POT sent, but it's really tough.[/QUOTE]Guess Epic doesn't have a very good version of the dev tools.
The response is in "JSON" format. You can copy the entire text into a JSON data viewer like [URL]http://jsonviewer.stack.hu/[/URL] to see it in the tree structure I described.
I have had 2 SBs text me this week that showed an I'd. One was her real name. The other was a business. I assume the business one was using a company phone. The other must not know her name is showing because a quick check of her socials showed was 10 years older and fatter than her profile info. Also showed her very buff boyfriend that could whip my ass with one hand.
Very odd to see any I'd info in this hobby.
[QUOTE=FarFarAway;3942469]On the Epic browser, this falls down for me at the point where he says 'you should see a tree' - I don't see a tree, it is just one string of characters w / o a line feed, so you can't see everything. I have searched for 'body' within that window and in some cases found the text the POT sent, but it's really tough.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=Zcochran00;3942854]Guess Epic doesn't have a very good version of the dev tools.
The response is in "JSON" format. You can copy the entire text into a JSON data viewer like [URL]http://jsonviewer.stack.hu/[/URL] to see it in the tree structure I described.[/QUOTE]I've found this to be useful in Chrome or Chromium based browsers:
[URL=https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/json-formatter/bcjindcccaagfpapjjmafapmmgkkhgoa]JSON Formatter - Chrome Web Store[/URL]
[URL=https://github.com/callumlocke/json-formatter]Compile from github: Makes JSON/JSONP easy to read.[/URL]
This is true, the site is unrecognizable from even just a year ago and from 5 years ago is like another galaxy.
There needs to be pinned post at the top of the SA forum in every city saying not to buy pics, send anything upfront or send money of any kind electronically, that it's always a scam. What's gotten worse recently is that a few months ago there were a ton of profiles seeking online only so you could just ignore them, but the girls (or probably guys in some cases) have gotten much more sophisticated, probably out of necessity as they weren't finding enough suckers, errr customers. They now lead you to believe they're going to meet you sometime down the road, but just want to do the picture thing because they're out of town (or need to get paid for gas money or car being repaired or working doubles or some other lie). Meanwhile, she's not even in your town in reality and is only using the carrot of an eventual meeting to get you to buy her stupid pics. Refuse that and all of a sudden she needs gas money to get home and will come see you then.
Then, basically half the new profiles are platonic only, and they seem to mean it and think it's realistic. And all of this has to be a product of dumb guys actually doing it, no way so many would be seeking it and spending time on it with no success.
Still gems for sure on there, have found several in the last month alone, but it is taking twice the effort and time, and countless times conversations start promising to wind up like the above and figure out the person's not even real or within 500 miles. They now know not to lead off with their BS about pics but to get you talking b / c then you're more likely to consider doing it.
The only solution I have to smoke them out before wasting too much time (you unfortunately can't tell from the profiles) is to immediately push for meets. If she's fake, usually the excuses will start like the above and she'll move to the pictures and gas scams and everything else. If she's legit and actually wanting to do this, she will at least engage about that, and will never bring up sending money in advance or selling photos.
[QUOTE=Ripvan12;3939219]Hey brothers. I also posted this in the Atlanta thread, but curious to hear your thoughts as well.
Let me be clear. There are plenty of gems still on the site, but the amount of time I have invested this go round weeding out flakes and scammers has been insane. By now most veterans know the rules to spot the spammers and old BP pros (talk of time limits, in town for only one night, send me money before meeting, can you cover my gas money, my mother is having a major surgery, blah blah).
But what are some other methods you guys are using to weed out the flakes and scammers?
For me. I have started to ignore females with only one picture on their profile! Sure I might be missing out on some goodies. But what woman you know is comfortable with just ONE pic of themselves. On a dating app with plenty of competition? My experience has been. Mostly. That these one-picture girls have one foot in and one foot out. Not really seeking anything quickly and prefer a lot of back and forth dialogue over 5-6 days.
Be safe. Ripper.[/QUOTE]
About a month ago, I started using this tactic. My first message is somewhat detailed showing I am serious, and respectful, but no BS is tolerated. And no online only stuff and pic trade, and sending money online. If I get a response, then I tell them only if they can meet me in person within a week, we should continue chatting. If not, they can message me when they are ready to meet within a week. Needless to say, more than 90% drop at that point. Girls who continue, I mostly had success meeting them. Going to FC is a different story. But, I weed out a very good bit of time wasters with this method.
Stay Safe.
Dr. S.
[QUOTE=TomDickNHarry;3943825]
The only solution I have to smoke them out before wasting too much time (you unfortunately can't tell from the profiles) is to immediately push for meets. If she's fake, usually the excuses will start like the above and she'll move to the pictures and gas scams and everything else. If she's legit and actually wanting to do this, she will at least engage about that, and will never bring up sending money in advance or selling photos.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=TomDickNHarry;3943825]This is true, the site is unrecognizable from even just a year ago and from 5 years ago is like another galaxy.
There needs to be pinned post at the top of the SA forum in every city saying not to buy pics, send anything upfront or send money of any kind electronically, that it's always a scam. What's gotten worse recently is that a few months ago there were a ton of profiles seeking online only so you could just ignore them, but the girls (or probably guys in some cases) have gotten much more sophisticated, probably out of necessity as they weren't finding enough suckers, errr customers. They now lead you to believe they're going to meet you sometime down the road, but just want to do the picture thing because they're out of town (or need to get paid for gas money or car being repaired or working doubles or some other lie). Meanwhile, she's not even in your town in reality and is only using the carrot of an eventual meeting to get you to buy her stupid pics. Refuse that and all of a sudden she needs gas money to get home and will come see you then.
Then, basically half the new profiles are platonic only, and they seem to mean it and think it's realistic. And all of this has to be a product of dumb guys actually doing it, no way so many would be seeking it and spending time on it with no success.
Still gems for sure on there, have found several in the last month alone, but it is taking twice the effort and time, and countless times conversations start promising to wind up like the above and figure out the person's not even real or within 500 miles. They now know not to lead off with their BS about pics but to get you talking b / c then you're more likely to consider doing it.
The only solution I have to smoke them out before wasting too much time (you unfortunately can't tell from the profiles) is to immediately push for meets. If she's fake, usually the excuses will start like the above and she'll move to the pictures and gas scams and everything else. If she's legit and actually wanting to do this, she will at least engage about that, and will never bring up sending money in advance or selling photos.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=DrSummer;3943840]About a month ago, I started using this tactic. My first message is somewhat detailed showing I am serious, and respectful, but no BS is tolerated. And no online only stuff and pic trade, and sending money online. If I get a response, then I tell them only if they can meet me in person within a week, we should continue chatting. If not, they can message me when they are ready to meet within a week. Needless to say, more than 90% drop at that point. Girls who continue, I mostly had success meeting them. Going to FC is a different story. But, I weed out a very good bit of time wasters with this method.
Stay Safe.
Dr. S.[/QUOTE]Why not just put it on your profile that you aren't interested in any bullshit, online only or pic trades? Should keep the ones that pull that from bothering to reply or contact you in the first place.
I am not a current paid member, but a couple of years ago or so I had a pretty gruff (or to-the-point) profile and while I didn't get a ton of replies, I did rope a few good prospects. One of them lasted about 7 months until the crazy chick wanted to get married. LOL.
[QUOTE=RogerOver;3944049]Why not just put it on your profile that you aren't interested in any bullshit, online only or pic trades? Should keep the ones that pull that from bothering to reply or contact you in the first place.[/QUOTE]
I've tried that. It doesn't work. My profile also clearly specifies that she must be very local, available days only and must host. I still get a lot of contacts from girls that don't match any of those criteria, and women from outside the USA Constantly favorite me. The 20-somethings just don't read - the Tinder-ization of this thing of ours.
[QUOTE=RogerOver;3944049]Why not just put it on your profile that you aren't interested in any bullshit, online only or pic trades? Should keep the ones that pull that from bothering to reply or contact you in the first place.
I am not a current paid member, but a couple of years ago or so I had a pretty gruff (or to-the-point) profile and while I didn't get a ton of replies, I did rope a few good prospects. One of them lasted about 7 months until the crazy chick wanted to get married. LOL.[/QUOTE]That might've worked then, but the site is nothing like it was 2 years ago. Using the app instead of the site means they just reply to messages and scroll through photos, even the legit ones first message is usually "what are you looking for" when you're profile clearly states exactly what you are seeking, so they're not even looking at the profile usually. As far as the scamsters their strategy is to cast a wide net, they know they're going to get 50 No's before they find a sucker. There's always been the individual girls thinking they can sell pics or find platonic or online only and those are easier to weed out because they'll tell you quickly what they're after, I think the big change is that there seem to almost be troll farms on there, bucket shop operations probably in Russia or somewhere, that are more sophisticated and smart.
Regardless, the % of legit profiles (real girl, local, wanting an arrangement) has probably gone from 80% of the new profiles to about 30% of the new profiles in the last few years, so it's just harder.
[QUOTE=TomDickNHarry;3944792]That might've worked then, but the site is nothing like it was 2 years ago. Using the app instead of the site means they just reply to messages and scroll through photos, even the legit ones first message is usually "what are you looking for" when you're profile clearly states exactly what you are seeking, so they're not even looking at the profile usually. As far as the scamsters their strategy is to cast a wide net, they know they're going to get 50 No's before they find a sucker. There's always been the individual girls thinking they can sell pics or find platonic or online only and those are easier to weed out because they'll tell you quickly what they're after, I think the big change is that there seem to almost be troll farms on there, bucket shop operations probably in Russia or somewhere, that are more sophisticated and smart.
Regardless, the % of legit profiles (real girl, local, wanting an arrangement) has probably gone from 80% of the new profiles to about 30% of the new profiles in the last few years, so it's just harder.[/QUOTE]This week I met up with my newest SB for a nice sushi dinner. We had done a meet and greet last week and she confirmed before last night's date that she was down to grab a hotel after dinner to add the physical aspect to our new friendship. The best part is that there was zero discussion of money. She is 5 foot nothing, slim, early 20's and a PhD candidate. She looks 18. She is light as a feather so I had a sh*t eating grin on my face as I was lifting her up and down on my cock like a fleshlight. This one is a keeper, just like a very horny girlfriend. We did every thing but anal, but I did not try for it. Uncovered everything, CIP.