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Stimpson J Cat
02-04-07, 01:29
Go figure true story.BS alarm going off.
BS alarm going off.
WTF
Who asked you.
Here's another one of those that likes confrontation. Maybe you should spend more time hitting some ass. It's a good way of stress / tension release.
I know what the fuck happened. I was there with four of my friends in Falls Church Va.
Just because you don't have the balls to speak your mind.
I do!
What is it about this pissing contest that constantly goes on here!
Just Me 69
02-08-07, 16:37
This is what men think of 90% of the day, the other 10% is thinking about what they thought about.
Just Me 69
02-08-07, 20:57
Is this the perfect woman?
An archeological team, digging in Washington DC, has uncovered 10,000 year old bones and fossil remains of what is believed to be the first politician.
Just Me 69
02-11-07, 18:38
This is a great shot, hats off to the photo bug.
Just Me 69
02-11-07, 20:28
The chase is on.
Took your eyes off the snake, didn't you?
Took your eyes off the snake, didn't you?
What snake?
Just Me 69
02-12-07, 22:34
It is a little tight
Just Me 69
02-13-07, 12:47
Most of the new pictures are old pictures.
Brain and snake photo plus others were posted here before.
I thought you said "snatch" :D
Member #5805
02-13-07, 18:30
Damn that girl has one fat snatch.
What to say to a real b!tch.
Just Me 69
02-13-07, 23:43
Check it out, now this is big
Benchseats Rock
02-14-07, 10:01
Happy VDay...
Just Me 69
02-14-07, 16:20
Two days of snow, freezing rain and no where to go.
Larks Tongue
02-14-07, 22:32
It is a little tight
I would definately eat that pussy of the girl in the t-shirt.
Just Me 69
02-15-07, 09:02
I would definately eat that pussy of the girl in the t-shirt.Please wait till I'm finished.
This is dedicated to all of those misguided persons that just do not have a good dog to help them sort out all of the realities of life. I know that it is very difficult, what with all the Political Correctness, Backstabbing, and just Plain Ole Lies, but you know a real good dog just seems to have a very well developed Sixth Sense that allows him to cut right to the heart of any critical matter.
Just Me 69
02-15-07, 17:23
Ahhhh kneel before the man of the cloth
Just Me 69
02-15-07, 21:17
If you are not looking, you will never see it all.
Would you really have to be paid to do this job?
Nothing worse than a controlling woman.
Just Me 69
02-16-07, 04:41
Is that take out only?
Larks Tongue
02-16-07, 17:56
Is that take out only?
My kind of woman, nice tits and she carries her beer well.
must be a trend among beer-drinking women
This one is just wrong -- apologies in advance
KC Questor
02-16-07, 19:32
More beer and boobs (http://glittermypic.com/userspictures/583733.jpg)
Is that take out only?
Re: BJ's Pizza...
One of the AMPs they closed in Waterbuy, CT., (USA) became a very short-lived Pizza parlor.. guess it was the name....
Johny's Pizza.
It's all in how you see a word, not all words have the same meaning to all people.Did you ask permission of this poor girl to post her pic and ridiculise her? A little respect, man.
PsyberZombie
02-18-07, 09:00
You also have BJ's wholesale club, what fool named that business?
Can you vision women lined for BJ's, with discount prices posted.
Hey , there's a hole chain of furniture stores down south called Badcock &more ('http://www.badcock.com/viewAboutPage.do')
I just love the "&more" part of their name =
what more do you need than a bad cock ??
The new Britney look.
The Blinds match the Linoleum
Your in-laws are there,
Your boss and his wife are there,
The minister and his wife are there,
You're all settling down for a nice relaxing evening dinner,
Then
in
walks
the
dog....
LL
It's all in how you see a word, not all words have the same meaning to all people.
How is this a joke or humorous story????
It is absurd and frustrating that these women (and so many/too many of the women we enjoy in this hobby) put up with that shit.
But it doesn't make it funny. If you in fact find that funny, you have some serious fucking issues.
Someone has finally made an orthopedic bed just for men.
Larks Tongue
02-19-07, 20:17
If that big set is the real deal I wonder how much those things weigh and how she can walk with them.
A john that is funny, we need more humor on the board.
Benchseats Rock
02-19-07, 21:55
We've seen her before...
How To Pronounce Oklahoma Correctly
Everyone has a group to hate, or blame for all their problems.FWIW,
That pic is from a woman 'protesting' in favor of gay marriage. That was a sign from MYAGE or "Mass Youth Activism Group for Equality"
Basically enlisting young people to protest for "gay rights" -- I don't know if that pic was fake or if its supposed to be ironic.
I like the O.K. pic better!
We've seen her before...No, the lady in the 2nd picture has brains. The lady in the 1st (Brittney) has NONE!
No offense, but these joke pics are a waste of space. They clutter up the pics of value on the site. Not to mention most of them are all over the net already and are posted more than once here.
Member #5805
02-20-07, 20:48
No offense, but these joke pics are a waste of space. They clutter up the pics of value on the site. Not to mention most of them are all over the net already and are posted more than once here.
Hey Bad Bird:
If you don't like the pics ignore the thread and then you won't have to see them. There are alot of us on here that enjoy seeing them.
Hey Bad Bird:
If you don't like the pics ignore the thread and then you won't have to see them. There are alot of us on here that enjoy seeing them.
I am all for a laugh. But I do not come in this section, that is not my complant. The issue is the joke pictures litter the photos link where you can go to see all photos posted on the site. It just makes it difficult to find real pictures and get info this site is intended for when there are so many joke pictures posted.
Once again, I am OK about posting jokes, as I said, no offense. I just am frustrated when I come to this site for info I must filter though all the joke pictures in that photos link. Maybe we can exclude the joke pics from the photos link? That way the only way you see the joke pics is when you intentionally come in here?
Dunno, just frustrated I guess. Use to be able to hit the photo link and see all the pics from one day on page one, now have to go though a couple pages and pay attention if it happens to be a joke pic. One of the recent ones had a hot chic with a Oklahoma shirt, I thought damn, what is the scoop on her, and it was a joke!
Benchseats Rock
02-20-07, 23:17
I am all for a laugh. But I do not come in this section, that is not my complant. The issue is the joke pictures litter the photos link where you can go to see all photos posted on the site. It just makes it difficult to find real pictures and get info this site is intended for when there are so many joke pictures posted.
Once again, I am OK about posting jokes, as I said, no offense. I just am frustrated when I come to this site for info I must filter though all the joke pictures in that photos link. Maybe we can exclude the joke pics from the photos link? That way the only way you see the joke pics is when you intentionally come in here?
Dunno, just frustrated I guess. Use to be able to hit the photo link and see all the pics from one day on page one, now have to go though a couple pages and pay attention if it happens to be a joke pic. One of the recent ones had a hot chic with a Oklahoma shirt, I thought damn, what is the scoop on her, and it was a joke!You know, on the photo thread, if you take the extra nano second to notice, you'll realize that next to each and every picture thumbnail is the forum it's posted in. And not for nothing, but you had to know that the Okie chic wasn't exactly going to be a trip report, right? I mean c'mon.
Dr. Laura has nothing on Dr. Ruth
Thanks, I needed that smile!
Dr. Laura has nothing on Dr. Ruth
Finally I've found a woman who understands fishing.
Larks Tongue
02-27-07, 20:25
This teacher needs help.
The busty babe could make a killing doing In or Outcall.
Some wives just don't appreciate what their husbands do for them!
Tony's wife thought it was very romantic when he vowed to have a
picture of her tattooed on his arm.
"There's just no pleasing some women!" Afterwards she threw him
out of the house.
KC Questor
02-28-07, 19:40
Negro is black in spanish, but what are they selling, does anyone know?
Negros is an island in the Philippines. This restaurant would serve food in the style of that island I assume.
Larks Tongue
02-28-07, 20:22
It's been slow every where, I notice the post are fewer each day, in most states.
That water looks nice....those guys should have just stripped down and joined them in the water.
No Hurry their not going any were either.
Vid has sound.
http://yuvutu.com/modules.php?name=Video&op=view&video_id=7703
Fucking hilarious.
LoveLOS
Baltimonger
03-03-07, 11:46
Sir in this day and age why oh why would you post a picture of a child in the manner that you did. though some might find it humorous there are those who may not. It is pictures like this which may cause LE to obtain a warrrant, and force Jackson to hand over all contact info of posters. Please only post pictures of those over 18 years of age!
Jackson lives in Argentina, and his servers are in Canada. LE could write up all the warrants & summons they want, he'll just tear them up and tell them to fuck off.
Beyond that, I agree about no kids pics in the forum. There are some dangerous people who lurk here, and we don't need this site catering to pedophiles.
This coming week is National Mental Health Care week.
You can do your part by remembering to contact at least one unstable person to show you care.
Well, my job is done .....Your turn!
Member #5805
03-06-07, 17:24
If she were limber enugh to turn her head around, it could be interesting
New State money comming soon
AmorousGent
03-13-07, 09:10
Saw this on tap at my local pub. My GF couldnt understand why I was laughing my ass off and why I wanted to order one! It was not bad. Definately a GBE (good beer experience)
This is heart wrenching, look at your own risk...
Baltimonger
03-14-07, 20:16
Saw this on tap at my local pub. My GF couldnt understand why I was laughing my ass off and why I wanted to order one! It was not bad. Definately a GBE (good beer experience)
It's actually pronounced Who-Garden; one of the finest beers from Belgium, a land of many great beers. There is one from Belgium though named Manneken Pis (http://www.manneken-pis.com/intro.html) which gets its name from a pissing statue.
Just wait a second .........he'll come by -
PsyberZombie
03-15-07, 16:09
For all you Wankstas out there
This is for those days you wanna be a Wanksta not a Gangsta
*Wanksta* is my new fave word , you may have noticed
Anywayz , here's the Video =
http://www.heavy.com/video/1319
Qcmastermonger
03-16-07, 22:34
hey asshole thats my wife, we got picked up for 12 over and we just wanted to get the fine paid. Lotta nerve posting that.
On the road again.
From the woulda, coulda, shoulda department...
Why I went to get valve extensions 5 times in the last three days...
Mister Quick
03-19-07, 15:44
NNo idea where these can be purchased.
Mister Quick
03-19-07, 15:50
reasons to go to church and a recruitment for priests
What a way to go.
...in that post reminds me of:
There was a young man from Kent,
Whose dork was exceedingly bent.
When he took the trouble,
to bend it up double,
Instead of coming, he went.
Indian Chief
03-20-07, 12:06
Be careful going down.
I saw as movie somewhere, and it was gross watching it.
I saw as movie somewhere, and it was gross watching it.
saw that same movie.. guy lubed up his bald head.. Girl looked pretty fuggly too..
reminded me of some movie, old west, girl posing as pregnant.. kept dropping large black rags.. eventually
got busy with the guy she met. when he reached orgasm, he screamed. bent backwards as he was drawn inside,
next time you saw her, she was pregnant again. Very odd movie!!
About the gross movie, why did you not walk out?
which one?
the one of the guy shoving his head up the girl's hole? downloaded it.
the one of the guy getting eaten into the lady, can't remember, Cinemax, or HBO.. at a friend's appartment.
Wanderer --:Those who wander, Aren't necessarily lost!
Just a pic of some old dog getting a Blowjob. He might also get a little pussy later.
Lord Helmet
03-24-07, 12:28
This is for all us dirty dogs out there.
The picture says it all...
KentuckyBellyButtonJewelry
KC Questor
03-28-07, 20:09
Why men need Post-It Notes:
"For the little things you'll forget"
I have been looking for this on-line to share with you:
http://www.wewin.com/the-script-of-a-porn-movie.aspx
Enjoy
The California Highway Patrol in the Los Angeles area recently found some amusement filling out accident reports in a series of car accidents. As it turned out, drivers were losing control and running into other vehicles upon seeing a giant women's pubis displayed on the front part of an oncoming car. The CHP started frantically looking for the dangerous pubis and came upon the tracks of a young hairdresser named Nelly Node. Nelly's passion for the arts made the young woman photograph her own crotch and put the zoomed picture on her Volkswagen Beetle. Nelly decided to use such a shameless method to prepare her college course work in which she analyzed the art of design. The witty student's idea worked for the college professors. She was proudly driving her "pubic beetle" until the CHP arrested the woman. The co urt ruled that Nelly's car was creating a dangerous situation on the roads. The girl had to paint! over h er car's hood.
Here's a picture of her VW before she had to repaint it.
I went furniture shopping, used to hate it, but now I can really get into some of the new styles....like this table. It's not an occasional table, it's going to be an "often" table! It even makes housecleaning fun!
Metro33777
04-05-07, 21:50
Oh yes dawg.Man, this is just so wrong in so many ways.
Happy Easter To All!
PS
You need to give him just a minute
Baltimonger
04-14-07, 22:11
This is what Don Imus was really talking about:
The dealership where I take my car for service has a new tester for testing the air conditioning in your car. It works pretty fast and it seems to always be correct. It worked so well for my car that I took my wife's down there and then both of the kids' cars. I'm in charge of a 125 car fleet at work and I've decided that our drivers deserve the best. I am now personally taking each of the company cars down and I personally observe the results of each test. I truly believe this method NIPS any problems in the bud. Maybe you should see if your dealership can acquire on of these.
Stop Nuclear Testing !!!!!!!!!!!
I hope they are not repeats... if so..enjoy again..
If it was only this easy.
Something other than dancing on your mind or no clean laundry?
Baltimonger
05-06-07, 13:18
A guy having sex with a blow up doll, and showing his face:
http://www.yuvutu.com/modules.php?name=Video&op=view&video_id=14395
Show her you love her, cuddle.
Very funny, CM! Thanks!
Yes, she had a baby and is due for another as she gets ready for her high school prom.
OMG, that is fucking hilarious. A real wh*re always shows her pregnant belly in formal wear - LMAO! Pretty soon, she'll be taking her own ads on craigslist . . .
Baltimonger
05-17-07, 21:35
Belly button jewelry:
A beer before it starts....
Al Qaida's 2nd in command has been captured by American forces:
Larks Tongue
06-01-07, 21:40
Al Qaida's 2nd in command has been captured by American forces:
That's so close to reality that it's scary.
Street Seeker
06-02-07, 20:05
Learn your math the old fashion way.
About busted a gut on this one...thanks for the laugh!!! No wonder our public schools are in trouble.
If this happened to me, I'd know I had the wrong house!
Al Qaida's 2nd in command has been captured by American forces:
One way you can tell a neocom is by their humor. It sucks. Bwahahahaha.
Wolfe
One way you can tell a neocom is by their humor. It sucks. Bwahahahaha.
Wolfe
One way you can tell a liberal is by their lack of one. The truth hurts.
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to
build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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Women will never be equal to men until they can
walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
gut, and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
I'm a tech at this company . . .
The question is, What does a 320 pound woman look like ?
Now, before you look at her pictures, get a mental image of what you think a woman who weighs 320 looks like....
Got it?
Ready?
Not what you were expecting,
was it??!!
The tallest and biggest woman in the world lives in Holland.
She is 7'4" and weighs 320.
What a relief!
Now we ALL know we aren't overweight,
just too short!
Have A Great Day!
The question is, What does a 320 pound woman look like ?
I'd fuck her. She is about the same height as me -- what a switch!
Here are other details
http://www.snopes.com/photos/people/tallwoman.asp
The question is, What does a 320 pound woman look like? The tallest and biggest woman in the world lives in Holland. She is 7'4" and weighs 320!
Have you been reading about all the tremors and quakes they've been having in Holland? Looks like they're not earthquakes, it's just this lady having an orgasm!!!!
You know what I like most about this lady? I could perform oral sex on her while both of us were still standing up!
Smiling Bob
06-15-07, 08:14
Thanks for the photos of the amazon.
She is fine.
I would do her all night.
I'm finding more and more good things using Google....
(Also, I finally was able to resize a picture, cool!)
Note the sign....as if we wouldn't know!
Should be in every lunch box....but watch out if there are any "chunks"!
Men come here often to buy these cards....
This guy didn't have a good time. In fact he returned to his cell and his cellmate wrote the hit song, "You Had a Bad Day" about the experience. (And then made him blow him!)
I've seen it all now, isn't this guy wearing the ugliest blue pants you've ever seen? I just had to take this picture to prove they actually exist.
Monger Forever
06-21-07, 12:07
Thats one sexy woman I would lick her for hours on out !
Larks Tongue
06-21-07, 23:58
Meaty.....!
I like a taste of that.
Nice find.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=AJy-0Lw4Nak&mode=related&search=
Sometimes they just can't get away from how they are trained!
I'm not sure I could get up at the crack of Dawn!
Pro Choice? Right On ! Right In!
Benchseats Rock
06-27-07, 23:11
From the N.Y. Post
Taylor Ville
06-28-07, 09:37
LONDON, June 27 The British government recently decided to drop the term 'common prostitute' from its legal lexicon, deciding to call such offenders 'persons' instead.
The word change, a last motion by the government of outgoing Prime Minister Tony Blair, was paired with legislation allowing convicts who are again found to be involved with the sex trade to avoid harsh penalties, the Daily Mail said Wednesday.
The new legal stance outlined in Tuesday's Criminal Justice and Immigration Bill represented an effort by the British government to avoid over-crowding in national prisons.
The new legislation will only allow courts to impose penalties on convicted 'persons' when they are judged to be 'persistent' offenders.
In order to be deemed 'persistent' by the court, one must have been caught as a sex worker twice during a three-month period.
The Daily Mail said even the punishments for those offenders will be limited under the new laws, with 'persistent persons' only facing supervisory or counseling sessions.
Just another day in my life....
I hope to God that is a photoshop fake. What a sad thing if not. Clearly, she didn't do that on her own election. If its real, its a heinous branding by a pimp.
Everybody have fun tonight!
Don't know why your actual post is not up on this board yet, but just wanted to compliment you on your recent find/post, "Famous snatches":
http://www.usasexguide.info/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=41736
Thanks from all of us for giving us an intimate view of these ultra-famous skanks. Don't we love to hate/love them?
Did you find this great collage on the URL which appears in the picture? (IMPORTANT: see P.S. below!)
Giani
P.S. CAUTION: I went to the URL "pricelesspictures..." and got a STORM of viruses, trojans, bots, keyboard monitors, etc! Perhaps it is a coincidence, but be VERY cautious about going to this site. My computer has suddenly gone into molasses mode! Anyone else have this experience? I am struggling to clean the crap out... Ironically, I keep getting popup messages selling cleanup software because my computer is compromised!
P.P.S. Got a PM which suggests it is a mistake to go to URLs listed on photos. Who knew (says me, ever the novice...)?
P.P.P.S. See post above for more bad news about the embedded URL.
Hillary's way of getting even!
Seva Lurker
07-01-07, 11:19
P.S. CAUTION: I went to the URL "pricelesspictures..." and got a STORM of viruses, trojans, bots, keyboard monitors, etc! Perhaps it is a coincidence, but be VERY cautious about going to this site. My computer has suddenly gone into molasses mode! Anyone else have this experience? I am struggling to clean the crap out... Ironically, I keep getting popup messages selling cleanup software because my computer is compromised!
P.P.S. Got a PM which suggests it is a mistake to go to URLs listed on photos. Who knew (says me, ever the novice...)?
Sites like that are one very good reason to buy and keep current both anti virus and firewall software. Nothing is 100%, but unless the 'attack' is brand new most reputable AV/firewalls software will protect you fairly well.
Even the newer versions of browsers have some built in protection. But caution is the word when going to sites like that. I'd also run some a complete scan. Some of sites will load tracking software that tells them where you've been and what you've been doing.
One thing with the tracking programs, is (at least my Norton) it may not be identified when it is loaded, but will show up as there in a scan. Norton calls these low risk, but I always have AV software remove the stuff.
Like mongering, be careful when surfing. :D
P.S. Giani
Once infected, you probably should run an AV scan from the companies web page first, let it clean your system then load the AV software. Many viruses and such will try to disable AV that is installed or being installed.
My virus scan is up to date, I run Ad-aware, and am (I thought) cautious. But today, on the URL shown in the accompanying post, caught an exe file no one on Google has ever heard of: ufxqbhcg.exe... I have not yet been able to cleanse my computer of it (Needed: penicillin for my computer!)
My suggestion to all who post pix which contain embedded URLs is to blank them out. The bitter taste in my mouth will remind me, but how about the rest of us surfers???
Sites like that are one very good reason to buy and keep current both anti virus and firewall software. Nothing is 100%, but unless the 'attack' is brand new most reputable AV/firewalls software will protect you fairly well.
Even the newer versions of browsers have some built in protection. But caution is the word when going to sites like that. I'd also run some a complete scan. Some of sites will load tracking software that tells them where you've been and what you've been doing.
One thing with the tracking programs, is (at least my Norton) it may not be identified when it is loaded, but will show up as there in a scan. Norton calls these low risk, but I always have AV software remove the stuff.
Like mongering, be careful when surfing. :D
P.S. Giani
Once infected, you probably should run an AV scan from the companies web page first, let it clean your system then load the AV software. Many viruses and such will try to disable AV that is installed or being installed.
I'd vow not to have him perform my wedding!
(Actually, this message goes with the post I did after this one see the next one and the explanation there.)
Actually this one is the Preacher's Perks. (But, she IS attached!) The other cartoon is the groom's perks but I think they are set to expire once the bride tastes the wedding cake or 24 hours after the consumation, whichever comes first (or is it whoever cums first?)
Let me reiterate what apparently everyone else knew... NEVER type in the URL apppearing on any HC picture. I have been running every anti virus, Ad-aware, cclearner, etc, and STILL crappy pop ups appear and my computer runs like molassas.
May I also reiterate: If you post images with a URL on them, do us all a favor and obliterate them before you post so us novices don't make my mistake...
Anyway: see if you like these humorous pix I found on a site that does NOT trash my computer...
Giani
Let's face it, peeing just isn't that funny. Farts on the other hand are hilarious. And what goes along with farts better than...... you got it, taking a dump
The Perfect Dump
Every once in a while, each of us experiences a perfect dump, it's rare, but a thing of beauty in all respects. You sit down expecting the worst, but what you get is a smooth sliding, fartless masterpiece that breaks the water with the splashless grace of an expert diver. But that's not the end of it. You use some toilet tissue only to find that it was totally unnecessary. It makes you feel that all is right with the world and you are in perfect harmony with it.
The Caesarian Dump Pain!
That's what this dump and childbirth have in common. Its simply a case of too much dump trying to go through too small a hole, and there's no obstetrician to help.
The Beer Dump
Talk about nasty dumps. Depending on the dumper's tolerance, the beer dump is the end result of too many beers. it could have been 2 or 22, it doesn't matter. What you get is a sinister, lengthy, noisy dump accompanied by a malevolent fog that could close a bathroom for days.
The Chili Dump
Hot when it goes in, and rocket fuel when it leaves. The chili dump stays with you all day, making your tush feel like a heat shield.
The Cable Dump
Long, curly and perfectly formed like 2 feet of E13 telephone co-axial cable. It loops lazily around the bowl, like a friendly serpent. You notice it has three rest rings encircling it. You wonder admiringly, "DID I DO THAT? Where did it come from?" You leave the bathroom pleased with yourself.
The Latrine Dump
In case you didn't know, a latrine is a hole in the ground with a tent around it where soldiers, boy scouts and flies go to dump. Tip: Don't ever, ever look in the hole.
The Mona Lisa Dump
This is the masterpiece of dumps. It's as perfectly formed as it can be. Delicate and slender with intricacies that would make daVinci weep. And just think, you made it yourself. You may even want to break out the Polaroid, but maybe that's going a bit too far.
The Empty Roll Dump
You're done...you reach for the toilet paper only to discover that empty cardboard cylinder. A mild panic begins coldly in your throat. You could use the curtains...no, someone would say "Where are the curtains?" Then what would you say? The rug?...too cumbersome. Then you must come to the same conclusion that every "empty roll dumper" must face...Pull up your slacks, tighten your tush and wriggle yourself to the nearest full roll.
The Splash Back Dump
You send the dump on its way, it drops like a depth charge into the bowl creating a column of cold bowl water that washes your bottom with a startlingly unpleasant shock. Now you're wet and embarrassed. Tip: Blot instead of wiping.
The Aborted Dump
You are in mid-dump when the phone rings. What do you do? ABORT! Pinch it off, go for the phone, and save the rest for later. It isn't pretty, but you've gotta do what you gotta do.
The Alfresco Dump
Everyone has had to go outdoors from time to time. This can be a rather pleasant experience really. The open air, the nature, and a good bush all contribute to the peaceful ambiance that our primitive forefathers must have enjoyed. What can screw up this harmonious interlude is a troop of brownies or a patch of poison ivy.
The Childbirth Dump
This is a dump that is simply too big to go through the aperture provided by nature for the purpose. You sit there, thinking over your dilemma. First it hurts, and it isn't going to get any better. You wonder if you'll ever see your loved ones again. You imagine the newspaper headlines screaming "Man dies trying to hatch monster loaf". You realize you'll have to resolve the crisis before you can leave the bathroom. Basically there are only three things you can do: 1. Scream 2. Call an Obstetrician 3. Hope like hell have enough Vaseline to get you through it.
The Tijuana Trot Dump
The phrase "Shit Happens" really applies here in a big way. When the ice in your tainted margarita makes contact with your lower intestinal tract, the fun begins. For the next 72 hours you'd be better off if you carried your own portable toilet with you because you will spend most of that time on the pot and the rest of the time in a fetal position. Now you realize why Mexico never
had a navy.
Clark Kent
07-04-07, 02:53
Giani, I had a downloader virus on my computer that was one of those that downloads ad pop up crap, and it was made so that when I ran Ad-aware it would close Ad-aware and make my computer restart. I tried everything from Spysweeper, searching continual forums looking for answers and thought I'd never get it off there. A friend of mine told me about AVG Antispyware and recommened it to me. I put it on my computer as it gives you a free 30 day trial. It not only cleaned all the crap that downloader put on my computer but it allowed me to delete it as well. I would recommend AVG for whatever problem you can't get rid of as it might help you as it helped me, it can be found at grisoft dot com.
Member #3919
07-04-07, 06:54
You can also try the SUPERAntiSpyware. My folks had the super trojan virus that sent up all kinds of crap on their system and this was the only thing that got rid of it.
However, she's still a merchandiser.
I can tell in the first minute or two of a job interview if the applicant is right for the job!
Humorous photos, we all need a daily laugh.
CM: Where did you find that picture of me???
(I'd better clarify that, I'm not talking about the cartoon in the same posting!)
Seriously, we love all the stuff you dig up.
As we always want out partner to say...
Keep it coming!
Scaldy Dog
07-07-07, 00:12
That gorgeous babe in the black and red bikini is the one and only Dixie Bubbles. Google her for more info. She's retired now (I think?), but back in the olden days, she was HOT!
KC Questor
07-07-07, 04:21
She's pretty. Not sure why she is in the Humorous Photos section, but I like her anyway.
Who's really in control of the TV remote
Larks Tongue
07-11-07, 21:00
Head first now that is funny, keep up the great work.
The soccer mom is pretty much useless unless you are into fisting.
This might be first class
Granny looks good, and the other guy is looking.I would like to do the boobs of that granny. Still looking juicy!
:D :D :D
Yoshineman
07-12-07, 07:12
WTF how did she put that in there?
http://www.hidebehind.com/thumbs3/0D/0DAE84.jpg (http://www.hidebehind.com/0DAE84)
http://omgtube.net/viewVideo.php?video_id=81&title=OMG
Why doesn't someone post the Miss New Jersey photos -- I can't find them but I am sure someone has them
From the first time I laid eyes on her, I knew she was made for me.
Going through life is hard enough,
but to go through life looking like a dick with buck teeth must be horrible!
This little animal really exists!
Unbelievable but true.
It's called a Naked Mole-Rat,from Africa .
KC Questor
07-17-07, 23:58
Sometimes it is obvious that advertisers don't always know where their ads are going to show up.
(I have heard that the juicer one with the carrot is Photoshopped -- still funny)
Sometimes it is obvious that advertisers don't always know where their ads are going to show up.
(I have heard that the juicer one with the carrot is Photoshopped -- still funny)
That's hilarious, KC! LMAO! Thanks for sharing!
Bend It
Dbldowndon
07-18-07, 17:44
KC, My Gawd, whose are GOOD!
I'll drink to their policy!
Michael has a new set of blitzers to worry about! (Although these guys don't look all that tough.)
Mister Quick
07-24-07, 19:14
had a fw pics on my hard drive I thought would fit this forum.
Seen this truck in your neighborhood lately? It's more than good humor.
Gotta acknowledge the rich quality of recent posts on this board. My prizes go to
1) Reading between the lines (Mister Quick):
http://www.usasexguide.info/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=42862
2) "No shirt" policy (Headfirst):
http://www.usasexguide.info/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=42659
3) Juice this (KC Questor):
http://www.usasexguide.info/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=42515
Thanks guys, keep up the good work!
Giani
Okaynow 2001
07-26-07, 09:32
I beat anorexia.
Okaynow 2001
07-26-07, 15:24
Angry while working on the computer.
A Picture is worth 1000 words
I think I like this swimsuit and this lady
"Cheap Sunglasses" by ZZ Bottom
Benchseats Rock
07-27-07, 00:04
"Pearl Necklace" by ZZ Top?
"Cheap Sunglasses" by ZZ Bottom
Head,
pretty funny the first thing that came to mind when I saw this picture was the father on Orange County Choppers
Head,
pretty funny the first thing that came to mind when I saw this picture was the father on Orange County Choppers
You're right, it does have a resemblance. And then there's the new movie, "The Simpsons"
Now this is a statement on the office policy manual!
KC Questor
07-27-07, 20:18
Here's a little story:
I visited a trailer hooker. She was a real wang holder, and she said I made her beaver wetter. She was the best lay, and we went at it for so long she got a bush rash.
Bird of Prey
07-28-07, 06:58
How long have you been holding these and how doesone come up with a totally new concept in collecting!
On a side note, I bet if you sent these to Leno, he would use them!
KC Questor
07-28-07, 17:14
Well, I didn't do the hard work. I saw them at a joke site:
http://www.jumbojoke.com/weddings_you_wish_you_could_go_to_1220.html
I just pulled out a few of them and arranged them into the little story. There are more there, and Leno may even have been the original source.
It's a moooooooooving evening at this place
This is an udder waste of bandwidth.
Actually, I'm working on a little more than a hug!
I stay late at work every night getting reports done, lot of reports....because they all go in the bottom drawer!!!
I found this movie very funny.
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=7PHQ4SUR
Thought for the day
Handle every situation like a dog.
If you can't Eat it or Screw it.......
Piss on it and Walk Away
Dodger Bulldog
08-01-07, 12:08
Your tax dollars at work.
PsyberZombie
08-04-07, 08:12
It's the
HAND JOB PROTEST SONG !!! ('http://www.clipjunkie.com/Hand-Job-Protest-Song-vid1660.html')
Their marketing plan works on me as I am sure as hell going to try....
Dodger Bulldog
08-07-07, 01:53
Why mongers should carry Post-It notes.
All you Figueroa street mongers.
A lot of things go out the window with it
One of life's worst cases of a missed connection.
PsyberZombie
08-12-07, 09:27
NEW OLYMPIC SPORT ('http://www.flurl.com/item/________________u_269752')
This could make a butterfly collector out of me!
Buy her some glasses first...
http://media.putfile.com/Need-Glasses76
The best darn thing I've found in quite a while to relieve stress
KC Questor
08-19-07, 23:38
The best darn thing I've found in quite a while to relieve stress
I wish I could control my computer that way. Double click, baby!
High-production street worker cums through.
Are your letters and memos coming out something like this?:
"Dear fghkl;'
Could be a keyboard problem!
Larks Tongue
08-24-07, 10:50
Are your letters and memos coming out something like this?:
"Dear fghkl;'
Could be a keyboard problem!
That doesn't look like a problem to me. Looks like something that I can work with.
This would be a sign of the times.
Make sure your car is properly equipped for your travels this holiday weekend!
I found the perfect spot to spend my Labor Day weekend! I'm relaxing and taking a load, make that several loads, off my mind!!
You have to admit you can improvise!
Capa Negra 888
09-08-07, 12:24
Here are the pictures everyone is talking about.
Capa
Thanks a lot! I looked and couldn't find those.
Capa Negra 888
09-08-07, 14:51
I use E-mule for all my downloads needs.
I have everything from the full Pamela Anderson video, Paris Hilton, Vida Guerra pictures... Just google emule project.
Thanks a lot! I looked and couldn't find those.
One guy online was dissing her pussy hair, saying she is "just another girl". Well, take one look at those smoldering, dark eyes, perky tits and "attitude" and any nasty old monger with a few hundred streetwalkers under his belt will tell you she looks like a keeper...
This could make a butterfly collector out of me!Now that is one purtty tat ~!
Man Needs Wife!Great pic! Hahaha. Good one
I've been jerking off to those hot pics of 18-year-old Disney ho Vanessa Hudgens all weekend! She is smokin' hot wit those nice titties and bush. The dark, smoldering eyes and dark skin don't hurt either :)
Benchseats Rock
09-09-07, 20:12
The Science of Gangsta Rap
Saw someone posted a pic and cant find the post but here is mine
-Layla
http://www.mysouthern-belle.com
Member #2862
09-10-07, 20:36
Looks like you got a case, often caused by teeth bleachers.
I found the perfect spot to spend my Labor Day weekend! I'm relaxing and taking a load, make that several loads, off my mind!!I wonder where that party was?
Looks like a fun for all.
My stars!
I'm in love with a teenybopper
Here are the pictures everyone is talking about.
Capa
I wonder where that party was?
Looks like a fun for all.
My stars!
Lay: We can make that happen where ever you want it to happen! :>)
A husband emerged from the bathroom naked and was climbing into bed when his wife complained, as usual, "I have a headache."
"Perfect" her husband said. "I was just in the bathroom powdering my penis with aspirin.
You can take it orally or as a suppository,...it's up to you!"
Biologists at the University of Florida have discovered a new species of lizard which has been attacking sunbathers at and near Miami’s South Beach. It is believed to primarily attack women, though it has been known to attack effeminate-appearing men. After it's attack, it often throws up and then shrinks in size. Only one known photograph has been taken of this creature, which is pictured in the attachment for your protection. Scientists are calling it a penisauras!
This is when you know you should have been more careful...
KC Questor
09-24-07, 13:54
This is SO not the car that you want to follow too close. He'd probably hit his brakes so you would rear-end him.
Lay: We can make that happen where ever you want it to happen! :>)Sounds like a weiner!
I think most of us can identify with this at least one time or another.
You know, it's pretty damn good on top when the rinse cycle is going!
You know, it's pretty damn good on top when the rinse cycle is going!Now thats a good one. Thanks for the giggles :)
Layla
http://www.mysouthern-belle.com
Both of my joke picture posts tonight are about "the juice"! This is the one I prefer to spend my time with.
Quality Junk
10-08-07, 13:30
All you can eat Chinese buffet style, something for everyone!
http://losangeles.craigslist.org/lac/ers/442074076.html
For haters out there, don't bother. I am full blooded 100% Asian, and I laughed my squinty eyes out when I saw this.
You can open this up from the front end anytime.
Warpig2000
10-10-07, 17:01
A moment in every man's life that should be set in stone-
Warpig2000
10-10-07, 17:03
Saving the Leaning Tower of Pisa...
Warpig2000
10-10-07, 17:06
Left high and dry with a swelling in need of immeadiate attention ;)
Warpig2000
10-10-07, 17:16
I think we'll pass on this carnival ride...
Uh-oh, someone found out what you've been up to!
It's gonna be the 7 ball in the.....oh hell, who gives a shit, can I just watch her aim?
A view of summer that will have to last all winter.
These would be handy but you'd have to be very, very careful!!
I would lend a helping hand.
What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.
Or, soon the cop's is going to be out
It won't take long to write up the cause of this accident
Does anyone else out there wish they had attended the U of T?
Wolfe
Any female takers?
KC Questor
10-18-07, 22:20
Too bad it is a hoax. Still funny though!
Snopes.com (http://www.snopes.com/photos/signs/toronto.asp)
Pervert Plan
10-24-07, 19:21
I almost fell out of my chair laughing.
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