Thread: Massage Parlor Reports
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08-25-20 20:24 #16376
Posts: 420Ymmv
Originally Posted by Sexingit [View Original Post]
And you don't have to show the site to them and whine like children. 99% of the providers know of this site and they read the reviews. Count on it.
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08-25-20 17:38 #16375
Posts: 131Why me, Yi Z?
Chinese is my preferred choice of parlor ethnicity these days. Apart from KK and the Thai members of the HOF, all other providers from the Land of Smiles want a $250 tip on top of the Thai Indy fee just to be barefoot. The Korean chicks massage you with the strength of a 12 year old with congenital muscular dystrophy pre flip, pepper you with more haggling than a Barrett-Jackson Auto Auction post flip and then practically rip your penor off with a newly discovered Power Girl level of upper body strength that was absent during the massage. In my experience, the Chinese providers will almost always give you a 6/10 or better massage and haggle free flip fun all for a reasonable price. Keyword being "almost".
I found myself in the Ballston area of Arlington this past Friday for meetings. All of the parlors in that immediate area to my knowledge are legit. So I searched RM for the closest Chinese place and was directed to Yi Z Spa on 50. Now Chinese spots aren't without their quirks. The Chinese providers tend to come with a higher shelf life than others and sometimes you'll draw a masseuse who looks like she went to high school with David Lo Pan. (Big props to you if you understood that random, Frankie D pop culture reference.) I find myself thankful though as I am greeted by a woman who although slender with no TNA or facial aesthetics, is at least in her early 50's.
She leads me to the room and I request an hour. She begins the dry, introductory portion of the massage where you're covered with a towel or sheet and loosened up. She begins to apply pressure that feels like it wouldn't rip a wet paper bag. My expectations feel like they've been popped in the eye by a Floyd Mayweather jab. She then begins to pinch and squeeze my neck and traps with a level of force that wouldn't squish a newborn ladybug and asks "is that too strong?" My expectations now feel like they've been hit with a right hook from Deontay Wilder after he dumped $619 worth of nickels into his glove. I tell her I can take more pressure but don't get it. The oil massage starts and it feels like the lady is doing her best mixmaster DJ impersonation on my back. A piece of me wanted to flip and cut to the tugger, but decided to just let her finish.
After hot toweling me she flips me and starts an okay ST of the front. She tugger gestures in my general direction, I agree, she oils up and gets to work. I place a hand on her back and, "WTF?! Does this thin bish have on a corset! I'm moved to think. I move my hand up higher and feel heavy duty straps and realize she's wearing a back brace. I'm as hard as a handful of Big League Chew that's been microwaved for 30 seconds.
Her tugger is as good as the other aspects of this experience and the back brace was sufficiently odd. I achieved only a semi. In order to go full mast I decide to use my imagination. One thing you may or may not have deduced about me is that I'm a freak. At some point in my imagination trip I think to myself "I should tip this chick extra to have her take off everything up top EXCEPT the back brace and the oddity of the situation will prompt a magical pop". (Told ya) I'm looking at this woman, imagining her in just the back brace, entertaining proposing the idea to her and then the opposite effect happens and I nearly erupt in laughter. I'm able to catch myself and bridle the laugh into a huge smile. She noticed my smile, smiles back and asked if I like her. I told her I did, she smiled harder and slowed the tugger to a passionate tempo and I eventually grailed the hell out of the room. 6 house, 4 her.
I guess all good things come to an end. I've been on a big teddies streak since the beginning of July, but oh well. I'm sorry I didn't ask the lady her name, but I'm definitely not going back and don't know why any of you brahs would go there either. Only scenario I can imagine is if you were in the area, paid for a hhr and immediately went face up. I don't even think that'd be worth it though honestly.
Frankie.
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08-25-20 17:20 #16374
Posts: 762Originally Posted by Barkeater [View Original Post]
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08-25-20 17:12 #16373
Posts: 424Originally Posted by FrankDigitola [View Original Post]
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08-25-20 16:35 #16372
Posts: 418Ymmv
Originally Posted by FrankDigitola [View Original Post]
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08-25-20 16:28 #16371
Posts: 131First rule of Fight Club.
Originally Posted by JimRob [View Original Post]
Any brah reading this that doesn't already know, let me share something with you. There's no reason at all why chicks need to know about this place. Women don't like simps. You simping yourself to a provider is going to have the opposite impact you're imagining. They'll like and respect you less. You effectively turn yourself into one of their Ugg boots. You're comfortable and easy to use. Remember how the game goes. Providers want your bread and have no loyalty to you. Us here, we're your brahs and we're trying to help you out. Treat this place like Fight Club and stop talking about it.
Frankie.
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08-25-20 16:19 #16370
Posts: 33POS or PL
Originally Posted by JimRob [View Original Post]
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08-25-20 16:15 #16369
Posts: 140Originally Posted by Barkeater [View Original Post]
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08-25-20 16:09 #16368
Posts: 125Originally Posted by Tophat31 [View Original Post]
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08-25-20 14:07 #16367
Posts: 123Barnie / Magic spa
So this was one of my usual spots- clean, quiet, low traffic, and easy to get an appointment. Sara was there first and she was pretty good. She disappeared suddenly and her replacement was Sophia. That woman was my ATF. Basically same age and build as Sara but cuter face bigger breasts and even better massage. It was the maximum combo of sensual and real massage I'm always looking for, with the same finish options as Sara. Just better executed. Sara came back but I never tried to see her again. And I liked her a lot.
Anyway they finally reopened in July and unfortunately both Sara and Sophia are long gone. I had Ruby who is again similar age and build. No idea as to face in these masked times. Shower and massage were decent and thorough- good but not as good as her predecessors. Standard finish, and she indicated on the way out that BJ was an option (the exact phrase was "next time sucky sucky".
This isn't meant to damn with faint praise. She's pretty good. Just not the same caliber. She said someone else manned the post on Sundays so may be worth checking out. If you happen to know where Sophia or Sara ended up, I'd appreciate a PM.
Originally Posted by DoctorDoctor [View Original Post]
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08-25-20 13:09 #16366
Posts: 134Vivian?
Originally Posted by GoodSamaritan [View Original Post]
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08-25-20 12:44 #16365
Posts: 125Originally Posted by GoodSamaritan [View Original Post]
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08-25-20 12:37 #16364
Posts: 2Originally Posted by JimRob [View Original Post]
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08-25-20 12:37 #16363
Posts: 2LEO watching?
Hi,
Long time lurker but first time poster. After reading all the last great adventures of people on the board at Papaya I decided to give it a try.
As usual I drive around the parking lot just to check if I see any weird looking cars (maybe I'm too paranoid?) and everything checks out.
I enter and get Annie she is "young" by AMP standard and good looking from what I could tell she had her mask on. I get hh give the house fee and get directed to the room.
Massage was ok ish and the flip was great she is really pleasing and does a great job.
The point of my first post is now. As I head back to my car on the parking lot I saw a brown car with a cop inside. He has his computer pulled up and definitely looked at me enter in my car. As I was driving he seemed to be following with his head movement and probably typed in my plates. I made it home and he didn't follow and so far I didn't hear anything. So please be on the lookout today if you see the same car and I'm now off to googling what is the worst thing that can happen to me if he was to follow-up (if it's a sting or anything like that).
Sad experience but it's worth sharing so you won't be in the same predicament as I am:
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08-25-20 09:40 #16362
Posts: 440Best
Some POS on this board will go running to Best looking to tattle on your post on the board. The little POS will get so excited as the pushy money hungry lady talks shit about you. The little POS might get a pat on the head for being a good tattle take talking about two sides to every story.
To that S talker. You're absolutely pathetic.
Originally Posted by Barkeater [View Original Post]