Sexual Addiction Reports

[Bozoner]

I find myself bouncing between SEXUAL ADDICTION, WORK ADDICTION, and DEPRESSION.

Normally I'm a sex addict. But then I start falling behind at work and need to quit the hobby for awhile and get back on track. Then I fall into a state of depression. I figure I need to start up the hobby again, and that helps. But then I start falling behind at work. And the cycle continues.

Help.

I have likened my cravings to a drink from a poisoned fountain that leaves one eternally thirsty. I drank from the fountain when I was 27 and have never stopped looking for that rush again. Yes, I "quit" too for a while, but now I really I can never do it. I want it too much, and have risked everything to get it. Even now, with this epidemic, I know I would not hesitate if there were providers nearby. Only my isolation keeps this hunger in check.

[DaveSalem]

I find myself bouncing between SEXUAL ADDICTION, WORK ADDICTION, and DEPRESSION.

Normally I'm a sex addict. But then I start falling behind at work and need to quit the hobby for awhile and get back on track. Then I fall into a state of depression. I figure I need to start up the hobby again, and that helps. But then I start falling behind at work. And the cycle continues.

Help.

I know what you mean. This time around, I've been in the hobby 9 years. I've "quit" a few times, only to be back a few months later. For me, the bigger rush occurs when they're dropping their panties. The sex is a rush too, but not in the same way. But the rush now is more dulled compared to even a few years ago. Even though I've loved shaved snatches and tattoos on the same body for several years, I'm now almost kind of like, "Oh ok, yet another 20-something year old drug addict with tattoos and a shaved snatch," yet I'm compelled to keep coming back.

I've been on hiatus for 2 months now due to COVID. This is the longest I've gone without in a while. I'm probably going to indulge again soon. But I'm not going to "quit" the hobby again because I know I'll just come back shortly after. At this point, I figure I will lose interest in the hobby when I lose interest in it. The timetable for when that occurs doesn't seem like it's really up to me anyway.

[UOnlyLiveOnce]

This post really hit home with me.

I wish I'd known what I was in for when I started with this hobby. Seeing one or two girls a month turned into a year of daily visits and browsing escort sites for hours a day. It was like I discovered paradise and I couldn't help but to devote a significant portion of my day to it. I had an idea that I'd stop at some point and had a few "last girl" moments myself, but I knew deep down it was bullshit.

It was pure bliss initially. I'd always leave fully satisfied and with a smile on my face, but the more active I became the more I needed. I'm never fully satisfied with these women anymore, no matter how well the session goes. If anything I leave depressed knowing I'll have to wait until the next day before I get to do it again. The rush I get from setting up a date that peaks just as I'm walking in their door combined with the sex itself quickly turns into a depressed, low mood that stays with me throughout the day.

I know what you mean. This time around, I've been in the hobby 9 years. I've "quit" a few times, only to be back a few months later. For me, the bigger rush occurs when they're dropping their panties. The sex is a rush too, but not in the same way. But the rush now is more dulled compared to even a few years ago. Even though I've loved shaved snatches and tattoos on the same body for several years, I'm now almost kind of like, "Oh ok, yet another 20-something year old drug addict with tattoos and a shaved snatch," yet I'm compelled to keep coming back.

I've been on hiatus for 2 months now due to COVID. This is the longest I've gone without in a while. I'm probably going to indulge again soon. But I'm not going to "quit" the hobby again because I know I'll just come back shortly after. At this point, I figure I will lose interest in the hobby when I lose interest in it. The timetable for when that occurs doesn't seem like it's really up to me anyway.

[DaveSalem]

I got caught once having an affair and my wife sent me to Sex Addiction therapy.

That was BS. I'll explain.

The therapist just tried to scare me into stopping my behavior. Warned me that I could get diseases from kissing, oral sex, and even protected sex. Warned me about extortion schemes and people that have lost everything. Then she showed me the progression of sex addiction. Porn, to sex, to multiple partners. Yes I had done MFM and FMF, so this was making sense. She said with addiction you're never satisfied and need to keep getting more kinky. She said next would be BSDM. OK Maybe. I was interested in bondage and had experimented some, but nothing more extreme.

But then next she said next would be pedophilia. That's when I left and didn't return. I have kids that I love to death and would never touch them or any others! Never ever ever!

[DaveSalem]

I'm right there with you, and it's so hard to go cold-turkey with sex addiction.

For awhile I was addicted to the Ashley Madison website. When I couldn't find someone locally I would start expanding my search radius, which got impractical to really meet women that far away. But when that dried up I then found the STG website, and then this website. No matter which website, it seems I spend at least 2 hours out of my workday (I work at home), browing for sex, and then many more hours during the work week texting with women and "doing the deed". I risk getting fired one of these days because I'm not getting my work done. Working at home is not helping one bit.

Yes it's an addiction. The best way out would be to level with my wife exactly what I need to be satisified, but that's not going to happen. She's not the type of sex partner I need (hot body, dirty talk, loves to fuck).

Sorry to ramble. Any similar experiences out there?

This post really hit home with me.

I wish I'd known what I was in for when I started with this hobby. Seeing one or two girls a month turned into a year of daily visits and browsing escort sites for hours a day. It was like I discovered paradise and I couldn't help but to devote a significant portion of my day to it. I had an idea that I'd stop at some point and had a few "last girl" moments myself, but I knew deep down it was bullshit.

It was pure bliss initially. I'd always leave fully satisfied and with a smile on my face, but the more active I became the more I needed. I'm never fully satisfied with these women anymore, no matter how well the session goes. If anything I leave depressed knowing I'll have to wait until the next day before I get to do it again. The rush I get from setting up a date that peaks just as I'm walking in their door combined with the sex itself quickly turns into a depressed, low mood that stays with me throughout the day.

[Von1995]

I've been a "monger" for a bit over 10 years. There were periods during those years where I was insanely active. Paying for extras at strip clubs, dating escorts on Craigslist and Backpage, making rounds on the street, just going wherever I could get my nut off. At a certain point in that time I decided to propose to the girl I'd been dating on and off for a few years. I thought that'd be the changing moment. I actually fucked who I'd christened as my "last girl" the morning of the day I proposed. What a fucking joke, thinking I could force myself to change just because I was getting engaged. I've been married for six years now, and it's only been in these last two that I began doing the serious digging required to move the quitting needle in any significant way.

The thought of quitting was always playing silently in the background though. Four years ago, I started dating the girl who gave me my first BBFS experience. I dated her several more times, most times with no cover, and it became the thing I sought out in dates. I got so adept, I could tell from assessing a girl's pics whether or not she'd be likely to let me hit raw, and I was fairly accurate. During that time I had the STD scares (that fortunately turned out to be nothing) and hit a brief phase of deep depression, unbeknownst to my wife. A couple times I just sat in my car and cried before coming home from work. It made me start taking the hard look at myself, though. Who I was, what I thought of myself, and why I was like this.

This post really hit home with me.

I wish I'd known what I was in for when I started with this hobby. Seeing one or two girls a month turned into a year of daily visits and browsing escort sites for hours a day. It was like I discovered paradise and I couldn't help but to devote a significant portion of my day to it. I had an idea that I'd stop at some point and had a few "last girl" moments myself, but I knew deep down it was bullshit.

It was pure bliss initially. I'd always leave fully satisfied and with a smile on my face, but the more active I became the more I needed. I'm never fully satisfied with these women anymore, no matter how well the session goes. If anything I leave depressed knowing I'll have to wait until the next day before I get to do it again. The rush I get from setting up a date that peaks just as I'm walking in their door combined with the sex itself quickly turns into a depressed, low mood that stays with me throughout the day.

[Eyes1515]

Title says it all. PM for details!

[Earl2211]

Well. Its only a problem when it starts negatively impacting your life. Like this lifestyle as a broke as digital nomad isn't ideal.

Could always just actually get good at game and pick up girls, but sex as a service will still always have a place in my heart or pants.

I mean seriously, is it really that bad being addicted to something that feels so good? I actually think people not addicted are missing out LOL.

[Panyapinyaya]

Well. Its only a problem when it starts negatively impacting your life. Like this lifestyle as a broke as digital nomad isn't ideal.

Could always just actually get good at game and pick up girls, but sex as a service will still always have a place in my heart or pants.

[Head First]

I too think I have a problem.

It's only a problem till we find the solution. By admitting here, or anywhere, to us, or to anyone, that we have a problem, we've taken the first step towards a better life. Congrats to you.

Now what? Research is our friend. And persistence. Ask questions. Do some homework. Be careful though as sex addiction has a lot of connotations attached to it. Just a fair warning and not meant to deter you.

Addiction is a mental disease as well as a physical one. Get some professional advice / help. And just as important, get some real life advice / help too.

This is one way to think about it. I've been having a streak of things breaking down lately.

1.) My a / c went out. I'm not a mechanic so I took it to a shop and a couple hrs and a few hundred later, it was blowing cold air again. Problem fixed.

2.) In June it seemed like it rained everyday. One of my sump pumps went out and flooded the basement. I'm not a plumber but I know one so a couple hours and a few hundred later, a new pump was pumping again. Problem fixed.

3.) The ice maker in my freezer stopped spitting out cubes. I'm not an appliance repairman so I called one and a couple hours and a few hundred later, that was working again. Problem fixed.

4.) My lawn mower got a flat tire. So I jacked it up and got it off and took it to the tire repair shop. Couldn't be plugged but he had the same exact replacement I needed and for $30 I was back yo cutting the grass. Problem fixed.

5.) My phone was so old they kicked it off the system. Did some research and found a perfect replacement. Brought it home and my son helped me get it up and running. No problem.

What's my point. Most of us are very good at solving other problems. So why do we fail when it comes to fixing our mind / body. Idk. Maybe because we're reluctant to seek out (mental/medical) help. But we don't think twice about fixing other things that go wrong in our lives. Go figure.

By admitting we have a problem we're taking that first step. Don't be afraid to take that second one. Because every step we take towards the solution is one step further away from the problem.

[Doug Stamper]

I didn't know this exisited and from reding these posts I too think I have a problem.

Welcome Midnight. The thread activity level varies depending on participation. Why not get things going again by describing why you might be a sex addict?

[MidnightDabber]

I didn't know this exisited and from reding these posts I too think I have a problem.

[Snake27]

I don't know that any "observations" would hold up to universally explain any sexual behavior. Personal observations by their very nature are biased, and skewed to the experiences of one individual. The Kinsey studies showed and other studies since have shown that what we think we know about sexual behavior isn't always what is truly the case.

Scientific studies back this up, but I can certainly personally vouch that females are very promiscuous.

Studies show that women play around as much as men. In this sexually repressed society we just don't like to think that is the case.

When I wrote entry 619 I had in mind (by "promiscuity") how much men were keen on initiating sex with new partners. Perhaps I misused the definition of promiscuity, though, and its hard to measure "keenness" or eagerness. You even said in entry 618 "Testosterone is a powerful hormone. The average male has a sexual thought every few minutes". (your words).

I think you can also measure men's eagerness, qualitatively at least, from men's far greater interest in the sex industry; more men are involved in seeking prostitutes, pornography, strip clubs, etc. And I'm not saying that zero women are interested in those things, just much fewer.

However, for "promiscuity in practice" it would have to be the same for men and women since they have sex with each other, the sum of women multiplied by their frequency of sex act must equal to the same sum for men. It's a heterosexual sum rule, and you don't need a study, it's just arithmetic. So maybe we agree after all? LOL.

[PartyTimeGuy]

Sounds good. You're living the good life. Good for you. If I / we were you we wouldn't want to change either. Or would we?

Because many of us here have been there done that. Things change.

Why are you posting here? This section is for addicts that 'want' help for our addiction.

When / If that time comes for you, come back for a visit.

In the meantime here's an FYI. Your reports are loaded with triggers that may cause someone in recovery to have a slip. You wouldn't walk into an A. A. Meeting and boast about how you're drinking and partying like there's no tomorrow, asking "Who wants a free drink?" would you? Same thing here.

I think you need to rename the thread. I have offered a suggestion in my title.

Regarding my commentary: I didn't know you were the final arbiter for this thread and it's appropriate content. If you are, I have a suggestion for you: don't have a thread exclusively for recovering sex addicts on a website dedicated to finding women for sex! You are concerned about the content of my posts causing a relapse for someone in recovery? Have you ever noticed the banner ads all around your thread? Your admonishment about whatever I would post is laughable.

You are trying the equivalent of treating alcoholics in the midst of a drunken frat orgy, or, as a closer analogy, on a website for wine tasters.

[Head First]

Looking back on it, I have been sex addicted since I was conscious. I was playing doctor with the little girls in the neighborhood and kissing and fondling them well before adolescence and after puberty I was unstoppable.

I banged everything in sight for free through my teens, 20's, 30's and 40's. Since then I have had hundreds of SWs, UTRs, escorts, AMPs and my current preference: SBs. I have no SO, plenty of funds and plenty of spare time, so I don't see the downside of sexual addiction for me.

I hook up with local "good girls" all the time. I have a rotation of over a dozen sweet, pretty, college-aged SBs that I bang regularly. If time and money are not an issue, and you have the game to hire amateur young cuties, I don't see where sexual addiction is so much a problem as a very intense and satisfying hobby.

Sounds good. You're living the good life. Good for you. If I / we were you we wouldn't want to change either. Or would we?

Because many of us here have been there done that. Things change.

Why are you posting here? This section is for addicts that 'want' help for our addiction.

When / If that time comes for you, come back for a visit.

In the meantime here's an FYI. Your reports are loaded with triggers that may cause someone in recovery to have a slip. You wouldn't walk into an A. A. Meeting and boast about how you're drinking and partying like there's no tomorrow, asking "Who wants a free drink?" would you? Same thing here.