"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

[BagIt]

So I use FB from time to time in doing some due diligence on POTs. After a couple of days of intensive looking around, I log in and FB has a list of people I might know or who are potential friends. Sure enough in that list are a few girls I had dated but not recently searched!

Now reading the website and googling, I learned that one's search history is hidden. So it looks like reading a girl's FB page is anonymous. She can't see that you looked, nor that you are lurking! I also delete my search history weekly.

So my concern is this. If looking around at these girls ends up generating a list of "people I might know", do I in turn end up on their "suggested / potential friends" lists? Is my searching around likely to lead them back to me with a suggested friend? If so this is scary and I need to rethink how I use this tool!

There is a good chance that you can eventually end up on their list of people they may know, happened to me.

[Madaboutmax]

I'd like to know more about this too. Fortunately, I never trusted Facebook or Google or Apple from the beginning and have been cautious. I have seen people I have never viewed on Facebook, but have texted show up in my suggested people I may know list. I suspect Facebook accesses your contacts and possibly your text and call history to make these suggestions. If you Google it, there are plenty of discussions about the invasion of privacy with these apps.

So I use FB from time to time in doing some due diligence on POTs. After a couple of days of intensive looking around, I log in and FB has a list of people I might know or who are potential friends. Sure enough in that list are a few girls I had dated but not recently searched!

Now reading the website and googling, I learned that one's search history is hidden. So it looks like reading a girl's FB page is anonymous. She can't see that you looked, nor that you are lurking! I also delete my search history weekly.

So my concern is this. If looking around at these girls ends up generating a list of "people I might know", do I in turn end up on their "suggested / potential friends" lists? Is my searching around likely to lead them back to me with a suggested friend? If so this is scary and I need to rethink how I use this tool!

[Cephlapod Love]

So I use FB from time to time in doing some due diligence on POTs. After a couple of days of intensive looking around, I log in and FB has a list of people I might know or who are potential friends. Sure enough in that list are a few girls I had dated but not recently searched!

Now reading the website and googling, I learned that one's search history is hidden. So it looks like reading a girl's FB page is anonymous. She can't see that you looked, nor that you are lurking! I also delete my search history weekly.

So my concern is this. If looking around at these girls ends up generating a list of "people I might know", do I in turn end up on their "suggested / potential friends" lists? Is my searching around likely to lead them back to me with a suggested friend? If so this is scary and I need to rethink how I use this tool!

[Hungre1234]

Interesting info, FFA. I may need to rethink my approach to social media with respect to sugar dating, but I also get the sense that I am a little more "risk averse" or concerned about privacy than you are. Which is fine, we all have our own risk tolerances.

Correct me if I'm wrong, I did know that Snapchat photos were self-destructing, but I's also heard that the receiver can "screenshot" the image on their phone and then they essentially have it. I understand that the Snapchat app DOES alert the sender to the fact that the image has been captured, but by then the "damage" has been done. Is that not true?

There is a way around the ss notification if the girl is savvy enough. There are apps that record the screen of your phone, whatever is on it. You can turn it on, open the snap, record it, go back into your videos and ss it. So nothing is fail proof, once you send a picture it's potentially out there, just a matter of what it's worth to you.

[Cephlapod Love]

It's been relatively free of pissing matches for years now, I don't know what prompted the urge for him to take a random swipe at me -- the original incident happened the exact same way.

One approach could be to take the high road and ignore the attack or take any "beef" private via PMs. It takes two to tango. Just sayin'.

[FruitNinja]

Interesting info, FFA. I may need to rethink my approach to social media with respect to sugar dating, but I also get the sense that I am a little more "risk averse" or concerned about privacy than you are. Which is fine, we all have our own risk tolerances.

Correct me if I'm wrong, I did know that Snapchat photos were self-destructing, but I's also heard that the receiver can "screenshot" the image on their phone and then they essentially have it. I understand that the Snapchat app DOES alert the sender to the fact that the image has been captured, but by then the "damage" has been done. Is that not true?

Yes,

You can screenshot a snap.

What I do is a use a picture I already have on a public social media site. (face cropped) Plausible deniability. I send the same in text, snap, of kik once I've felt the girl out. I have had plenty of girls meet without seeing a picture. It's all in the way you handle yourself.

[FarFarAway]

Interesting info, FFA. I may need to rethink my approach to social media with respect to sugar dating, but I also get the sense that I am a little more "risk averse" or concerned about privacy than you are. Which is fine, we all have our own risk tolerances.

Correct me if I'm wrong, I did know that Snapchat photos were self-destructing, but I's also heard that the receiver can "screenshot" the image on their phone and then they essentially have it. I understand that the Snapchat app DOES alert the sender to the fact that the image has been captured, but by then the "damage" has been done. Is that not true?

Well, I think I am pretty cautious, read some of my other recent posts on this thread. There is a necessity, though, to show a real pic before getting a girl to agree to meet in my experience. Others have said in the past that it is possible to capture a photo off of snap, I don't doubt that. But, does the current POT have the presence of mind to do it? Not all do, so it is a little safer. I also have come to the conclusion from messaging that this is a real person, not a scammer, before I do the pic.

I am not active on SA now, but have been in the past month. I definitely got some messages that were very terse, and after some back and forth, again terse, I concluded they could be 1) someone trying to get my pic and # for extortion or 2) a super cautious POT. Regardless, I didn't pursue b / c of the low probability.

I have replied to girls whose only response to my initial message is 'see private photos' a little ditty about scammers being on the site, I'd like to get to know them a little more beforehand, and they should be careful too. It makes me look more normal and cautious, which I am, and caring about them. It sends scammers running.

[JZLizard]

Okay kids. Play nice!! LOL. Remember you can just ignore someone post. No reason to turn this place ugly again.

It's been relatively free of pissing matches for years now, I don't know what prompted the urge for him to take a random swipe at me -- the original incident happened the exact same way.

[Madaboutmax]

Okay kids. Play nice!! LOL. Remember you can just ignore someone post. No reason to turn this place ugly again.

You might want to "think" about what fake news is one more time. Here is an example of you doing EXACTLY what my memory recalled you doing, sending marketing blasts offering specific amounts. And that took me less than 30 seconds to find, thanks to the Highlights and Index thread.

http://www.usasexguide.nl/forum/show...=1#post2357362

I don't know if there's a blurry line between "fake news" and early stage dementia or not, but I said what I did because the practices you recommended back then can lead to someone getting permanently banned from SA, and I'm here to post helpful information when I can, and have no interest in feeding my own ego or one upping anyone else.

[Kwagmire]

I don't think you 'get' snap or kik. I use both of them. Snap is the only one I would send a photo on, b / c it is supposed to autodelete after viewing. I also use kik, there is a video chat aspect to it I have used in place of a phone call. It is anonymous for the girl if she is uncomfortable giving her real phone # (girls who don't have burner / google voice numbers). I am on those social media apps exactly because the girls are. You can find out intel about them in this way. They automatically search your contacts for members, trying to connect you. I have gotten girl's real names or other interesting info (I. E. , a username like 'blondesub' or 'tommysmommy') in this way.

Interesting info, FFA. I may need to rethink my approach to social media with respect to sugar dating, but I also get the sense that I am a little more "risk averse" or concerned about privacy than you are. Which is fine, we all have our own risk tolerances.

Correct me if I'm wrong, I did know that Snapchat photos were self-destructing, but I's also heard that the receiver can "screenshot" the image on their phone and then they essentially have it. I understand that the Snapchat app DOES alert the sender to the fact that the image has been captured, but by then the "damage" has been done. Is that not true?

[JZLizard]

To the best of your knowledge? Please. I think this is what is now commonly referred to as Fake News. lol.. If you want to know the facts just ask.. I see very little has changed here in the last few years. I'll check back in a few more. So bye for now.

You might want to "think" about what fake news is one more time. Here is an example of you doing EXACTLY what my memory recalled you doing, sending marketing blasts offering specific amounts. And that took me less than 30 seconds to find, thanks to the Highlights and Index thread.

http://www.usasexguide.nl/forum/show...=1#post2357362

I don't know if there's a blurry line between "fake news" and early stage dementia or not, but I said what I did because the practices you recommended back then can lead to someone getting permanently banned from SA, and I'm here to post helpful information when I can, and have no interest in feeding my own ego or one upping anyone else.

[FarFarAway]

I, too, worry a lot about the photo thing and the extortion sites. That shit is evil and forever, and there are people out there who just enjoy screwing up guy's lives.


Of course, I use a burner phone as well, and a fake name. I also tell women that I don't use facebook, and explain that I'm a busy executive and I don't have time for such trivial distractions. Much more important things going on in my life. Which is true... I don't Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Kik or any of the other silly social media junk.

I feel this thwarts the extortion site crowd. It's no fun to post a blurry face pic on an extortion site, and the burner number can easily be abandoned.

I don't think you 'get' snap or kik. I use both of them. Snap is the only one I would send a photo on, b / c it is supposed to autodelete after viewing. I also use kik, there is a video chat aspect to it I have used in place of a phone call. It is anonymous for the girl if she is uncomfortable giving her real phone # (girls who don't have burner / google voice numbers). I am on those social media apps exactly because the girls are. You can find out intel about them in this way. They automatically search your contacts for members, trying to connect you. I have gotten girl's real names or other interesting info (I. E. , a username like 'blondesub' or 'tommysmommy') in this way.

[Kwagmire]

I do not make a practice of sending photos by text, then she has them forever. I prefer letting her see them on the site, then rescinding permission. Yes, she could download them while they are available, if she's really thinking ahead. I have a SO, it's a big worry for me, but even if you are single, if someone bad gets your photo and your number, you can expect it to show up on an extortion site.

I, too, worry a lot about the photo thing and the extortion sites. That shit is evil and forever, and there are people out there who just enjoy screwing up guy's lives.

My answer to that is that I use a candid shot of a former d-list (d-list not in a trashy way, but in a not-currently-active way) celebrity who people have told me is my "doppleganger", and I have blurred the face slightly. I explain in my profile that because of my work I am very privacy conscious, and in general a private and discreet person. I think while a POT SB might prefer to see a clear photo, she is comforted a bit by my attention to discretion, and the two are a wash. I also artfully dodge the request for additional photos saying that she can see the real me over coffee.

Of course, I use a burner phone as well, and a fake name. I also tell women that I don't use facebook, and explain that I'm a busy executive and I don't have time for such trivial distractions. Much more important things going on in my life. Which is true... I don't Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Kik or any of the other silly social media junk.

I feel this thwarts the extortion site crowd. It's no fun to post a blurry face pic on an extortion site, and the burner number can easily be abandoned.

[FarFarAway]

To the best of your knowledge? Please. I think this is what is now commonly referred to as Fake News. lol.. If you want to know the facts just ask.. I see very little has changed here in the last few years. I'll check back in a few more. So bye for now.

I do think it is now the case, in the age of FOSTA, that SA is policing messages, and if there is too much specificity about $ amounts and particular details, rather than for the nebulous 'arrangement', you can get banned from the site. I know, I have been banned for even much milder behavior. You can get back on of course, you just have to use a new email address. That's a pain if you have something ingrained in your memory and / or have paid for. Also, take a look at the grounds under which someone can be 'reported' - even general 'escort talk' is against the terms of service.

So, I try to move girls off to text etc. Quickly. I do not make a practice of sending photos by text, then she has them forever. I prefer letting her see them on the site, then rescinding permission. Yes, she could download them while they are available, if she's really thinking ahead. I have a SO, it's a big worry for me, but even if you are single, if someone bad gets your photo and your number, you can expect it to show up on an extortion site.

[HollywoodGuy]

Start with the Index and FAQ. However, I highly recommend looking at it as an overall glimpse into the perspective of various SDs, and not so much a how-to guide to be followed to the letter. Read it and try to develop your own style. I've written a lot about what works for me, but my game hinges on exercise as a mandatory component of it, and I would have diminished results due to lower T levels and sexual performance if I stopped exercising and let myself go, I'm sure.

HWG's "stepped game plan", to the best of my knowledge, hinged on sending out pre-typed marketing blasts to lots of girls offering specific amounts of money. I don't know if people still do this, but I do know SA now detects this "form letter" approach to mails and some members have reported account suspension over these marketing blasts. Further more, this technique only works with pros, a real SB will get creeped out by offers for money in the first message -- you have to be much smoother than this if you want to land a real SB. What's more, increasingly, it's a very bad idea to make any sort of monetary offer for sex over digital communications, and it not only puts the hobby in jeopardy, and you at legal risk, but it draws more pros to SA and makes it harder to find a real SB. So much so, that if you read some of the SB boards in other cities, you'll find a lot of sugaring noobs don't even know the difference between an SB and a utr/pro.

To the best of your knowledge? Please. I think this is what is now commonly referred to as Fake News. lol.. If you want to know the facts just ask.. I see very little has changed here in the last few years. I'll check back in a few more. So bye for now.