"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

[FanRat]

You think that is scary?

I was doing some online shopping and the details of teh products on offer were a bit confusing. Plus the retailer practically urged me, by comments on the website, to call one of their helpful customer service Reps. So after some time scratching my head, I called and was connected to "Bill Smith" I start talking to Bill and then all of a sudden a pop up box appears on my screen with a picture of Bill & his phone number! Huh? How'd they do that?

Then as the conversation continued, Bill wanted me to look at another product, so on my computer screen up pops yet another box which has a hotlink to what product he wanted me to see? So some how from a phone call, the retailer could "see" my computer and manipulate the computer to do pop-ups!



How is this possible? A phone call and a company is in control of my computer?

Websites use "cookies" - text files that gather information on what pages you visit, what links you click on, even what pages you spend time on. Thata data is fed back to the website your on, analyzed and used to throw popups for things you appear interested in. Google, Facebook, Amazon and all of them also share that data. Its pretty spooky.

You can turn cookies off in most browsers but sometimes the sites won't load properly or fully if you do. That setting is usually under security or privacy.

Good luck and stay safe!

[Cephlapod Love]

That is scary. Can fabebook do tht? What if I clear histry on my browser? Will it still kno?

You think that is scary?

I was doing some online shopping and the details of teh products on offer were a bit confusing. Plus the retailer practically urged me, by comments on the website, to call one of their helpful customer service Reps. So after some time scratching my head, I called and was connected to "Bill Smith" I start talking to Bill and then all of a sudden a pop up box appears on my screen with a picture of Bill & his phone number! Huh? How'd they do that?

Then as the conversation continued, Bill wanted me to look at another product, so on my computer screen up pops yet another box which has a hotlink to what product he wanted me to see? So some how from a phone call, the retailer could "see" my computer and manipulate the computer to do pop-ups!

WTF!!!!!

How is this possible? A phone call and a company is in control of my computer?

[Cephlapod Love]

I would just make sure you don't have a FB account under your real name. There are all sorts of perils for an SD with an SO or a career to use FB under his real identity. Everything from the girl possibly learning your true identity, to even "contact association data" being sold by FB to other companies at some point in the future and published on a public website. Invasion of privacy is big business these days, and the technology for doing so is so good that folks who have dedicated their career to this field have trouble keeping up. The typical consumer / facebook user doesn't stand a chance. What happens on FB today is not necessarily what you will see tomorrow.

Yeah, I agree. The problem is that it appears to be impossible to set up a monger account on FB these days. Er, unless someone knows what techniques one can use? I do know that FB will NOT accept an app number, like Google Voice, so one has to use a a burner number that is a "real" phone number. Now whether FB puts cookies or some other identifying info on your computer or phone so that when one sets up a a "second" account from that device, FB knows. It is however clear that IF FB suspects something that it immediately requests you send an scan of I'd. So it appears to be difficult if not impossible to set up monger accounts now.

Anyone know techniques to use?

[JZLizard]

So I use FB from time to time in doing some due diligence on POTs. After a couple of days of intensive looking around, I log in and FB has a list of people I might know or who are potential friends. Sure enough in that list are a few girls I had dated but not recently searched!

Now reading the website and googling, I learned that one's search history is hidden. So it looks like reading a girl's FB page is anonymous. She can't see that you looked, nor that you are lurking! I also delete my search history weekly.

So my concern is this. If looking around at these girls ends up generating a list of "people I might know", do I in turn end up on their "suggested / potential friends" lists? Is my searching around likely to lead them back to me with a suggested friend? If so this is scary and I need to rethink how I use this tool!

I would just make sure you don't have a FB account under your real name. There are all sorts of perils for an SD with an SO or a career to use FB under his real identity. Everything from the girl possibly learning your true identity, to even "contact association data" being sold by FB to other companies at some point in the future and published on a public website. Invasion of privacy is big business these days, and the technology for doing so is so good that folks who have dedicated their career to this field have trouble keeping up. The typical consumer / facebook user doesn't stand a chance. What happens on FB today is not necessarily what you will see tomorrow.

[JZLizard]

One approach could be to take the high road and ignore the attack or take any "beef" private via PMs. It takes two to tango. Just sayin'.

And some would say one approach would be avoiding involving ourselves in matters that don't already involve us. I don't do PMs personally, I keep my inbox full intentionally, because I come here to share information and learn things about the lifestyle and I don't think the flow of information is optimal via PMs. If it's worth reading, it should be posted to the board for others to benefit from. I also don't have time to field questions from every reader that reads my posts and wants private coaching on how to get more young pussy for free.

I don't disagree that sometimes it's better to ignore shit stirring attempts, but on this forum, my main goal is to better the SD lifestyle -- that's it. I'm keeping a finger on the pulse of sugaring, and doing what I can to keep it healthy. If someone is creating a situation that is against SA's rules, then I see it as a threat to the hobby and if nothing else I'd like to help them see how that bad advice might get them banned. I'm not trying to stop anyone from mongering, just to stop -- or at least slow -- the downfall of the perfectly legal hobby of sugaring, and the drawing of negative media attention to it in the process. And, if I make an attempt to dissuade folks from following bad advice, and the purveyor of bad advice comes along and calls me a liar, then yeah he needs be called on it -- and that's what happened.

[FTP1999]

Facebook was discussed before.

If you check on them, you name may come up as a suggested friend.

That's why I have fake accounts on Facebook, Instagram and even LinkedIn.

[BStreet]

I think too, if you search then block them, that enables you to not show up on their list of people they may know

There is history on this topic in this thread, but it may be too hard to find. This is the deal. If you can possibly use some facebook page other than the real you, do so. Either a corporate one, or one that you have established with your sugar identity. I think the latter may be hard to do de novo today, but some SDs established these back in the day and they are still alive. I tried to make one a couple of years ago, and after a while, without being able to provide identity verification, FB deleted the account. I don't know how those Russians did it to rig the election.

Anyway, the other thing is to clear your search history. FB says on that page that your search history is confidential (from the rest of the world, I guess, but not from FB itself). I do believe they use the things you have searched for to make suggestions of possible friends. FB used to be great to locate the real identity of POTs based on the phone # they provide, but with all of the concern for privacy on FB these days, this capability has been removed. You may search on other things, like first name or area or other facts you have, I have a bowl buddy who has had some success in this regard. Anyway if you search for a POT on FB, afterward, click on the right-hand side of the search window until you get a pop-up that says Edit. If you click it, it shows you your history of searches on that account. One of the options available is to clear all. Do that.

.

[FarFarAway]

That is scary. Can fabebook do tht? What if I clear histry on my browser? Will it still kno?

There is history on this topic in this thread, but it may be too hard to find. This is the deal. If you can possibly use some facebook page other than the real you, do so. Either a corporate one, or one that you have established with your sugar identity. I think the latter may be hard to do de novo today, but some SDs established these back in the day and they are still alive. I tried to make one a couple of years ago, and after a while, without being able to provide identity verification, FB deleted the account. I don't know how those Russians did it to rig the election.

Anyway, the other thing is to clear your search history. FB says on that page that your search history is confidential (from the rest of the world, I guess, but not from FB itself). I do believe they use the things you have searched for to make suggestions of possible friends. FB used to be great to locate the real identity of POTs based on the phone # they provide, but with all of the concern for privacy on FB these days, this capability has been removed. You may search on other things, like first name or area or other facts you have, I have a bowl buddy who has had some success in this regard. Anyway if you search for a POT on FB, afterward, click on the right-hand side of the search window until you get a pop-up that says Edit. If you click it, it shows you your history of searches on that account. One of the options available is to clear all. Do that.

[MattBrown]

That is scary. Can fabebook do tht? What if I clear histry on my browser? Will it still kno?

I'd like to know more about this too. Fortunately, I never trusted Facebook or Google or Apple from the beginning and have been cautious. I have seen people I have never viewed on Facebook, but have texted show up in my suggested people I may know list. I suspect Facebook accesses your contacts and possibly your text and call history to make these suggestions. If you Google it, there are plenty of discussions about the invasion of privacy with these apps.

[BagIt]

So I use FB from time to time in doing some due diligence on POTs. After a couple of days of intensive looking around, I log in and FB has a list of people I might know or who are potential friends. Sure enough in that list are a few girls I had dated but not recently searched!

Now reading the website and googling, I learned that one's search history is hidden. So it looks like reading a girl's FB page is anonymous. She can't see that you looked, nor that you are lurking! I also delete my search history weekly.

So my concern is this. If looking around at these girls ends up generating a list of "people I might know", do I in turn end up on their "suggested / potential friends" lists? Is my searching around likely to lead them back to me with a suggested friend? If so this is scary and I need to rethink how I use this tool!

There is a good chance that you can eventually end up on their list of people they may know, happened to me.

[Madaboutmax]

I'd like to know more about this too. Fortunately, I never trusted Facebook or Google or Apple from the beginning and have been cautious. I have seen people I have never viewed on Facebook, but have texted show up in my suggested people I may know list. I suspect Facebook accesses your contacts and possibly your text and call history to make these suggestions. If you Google it, there are plenty of discussions about the invasion of privacy with these apps.

So I use FB from time to time in doing some due diligence on POTs. After a couple of days of intensive looking around, I log in and FB has a list of people I might know or who are potential friends. Sure enough in that list are a few girls I had dated but not recently searched!

Now reading the website and googling, I learned that one's search history is hidden. So it looks like reading a girl's FB page is anonymous. She can't see that you looked, nor that you are lurking! I also delete my search history weekly.

So my concern is this. If looking around at these girls ends up generating a list of "people I might know", do I in turn end up on their "suggested / potential friends" lists? Is my searching around likely to lead them back to me with a suggested friend? If so this is scary and I need to rethink how I use this tool!

[Cephlapod Love]

So I use FB from time to time in doing some due diligence on POTs. After a couple of days of intensive looking around, I log in and FB has a list of people I might know or who are potential friends. Sure enough in that list are a few girls I had dated but not recently searched!

Now reading the website and googling, I learned that one's search history is hidden. So it looks like reading a girl's FB page is anonymous. She can't see that you looked, nor that you are lurking! I also delete my search history weekly.

So my concern is this. If looking around at these girls ends up generating a list of "people I might know", do I in turn end up on their "suggested / potential friends" lists? Is my searching around likely to lead them back to me with a suggested friend? If so this is scary and I need to rethink how I use this tool!

[Hungre1234]

Interesting info, FFA. I may need to rethink my approach to social media with respect to sugar dating, but I also get the sense that I am a little more "risk averse" or concerned about privacy than you are. Which is fine, we all have our own risk tolerances.

Correct me if I'm wrong, I did know that Snapchat photos were self-destructing, but I's also heard that the receiver can "screenshot" the image on their phone and then they essentially have it. I understand that the Snapchat app DOES alert the sender to the fact that the image has been captured, but by then the "damage" has been done. Is that not true?

There is a way around the ss notification if the girl is savvy enough. There are apps that record the screen of your phone, whatever is on it. You can turn it on, open the snap, record it, go back into your videos and ss it. So nothing is fail proof, once you send a picture it's potentially out there, just a matter of what it's worth to you.

[Cephlapod Love]

It's been relatively free of pissing matches for years now, I don't know what prompted the urge for him to take a random swipe at me -- the original incident happened the exact same way.

One approach could be to take the high road and ignore the attack or take any "beef" private via PMs. It takes two to tango. Just sayin'.

[FruitNinja]

Interesting info, FFA. I may need to rethink my approach to social media with respect to sugar dating, but I also get the sense that I am a little more "risk averse" or concerned about privacy than you are. Which is fine, we all have our own risk tolerances.

Correct me if I'm wrong, I did know that Snapchat photos were self-destructing, but I's also heard that the receiver can "screenshot" the image on their phone and then they essentially have it. I understand that the Snapchat app DOES alert the sender to the fact that the image has been captured, but by then the "damage" has been done. Is that not true?

Yes,

You can screenshot a snap.

What I do is a use a picture I already have on a public social media site. (face cropped) Plausible deniability. I send the same in text, snap, of kik once I've felt the girl out. I have had plenty of girls meet without seeing a picture. It's all in the way you handle yourself.