Massage Parlor Reports

[SaintChuck]

Yeah. Been there, but it was with my friend Lucy about 8 months ago. So there was no uncertainty. Afterword, I took her to lunch at Red Lobster (LOL) and she ate whatever the grand feast is called. Jesus, can she eat. She's about 35 and relatively cute, and really quite smart. We discussed strategies of investing in the stock market. Lucy is now at a place in LaGrange. HE only for guys she knows.

Anyway, here's the point of my reply. The Chinese places will take appointments. They (and I) actually prefer it. So as you were leaving, you should have asked the pretty girl's name and what days she works. As to the switch-er-roo, I expect that (a) they know why you are there, and (b) the woman you got first was new and perhaps would not do HE. Most places, you would be shit-out-of-luck, so I give them credit for bringing the other lady in. (c) The other possibility is you got the owner and she had no intention of giving you HE. But black tooth was busy. Instead of saying wait ten minutes, the owner starts you off. They know people will leave and not come back. Yeah. I hate the half walls too. I try to come early. Most places where I'm a regular, I come before they officially open. So the half-walls don't matter. The other thing you can do when there are half walls (just to amuse everybody) is to imitate Meg Ryan from the orgasm scene in the movie "When Harry Met Sally". Yes! Yes! Yes! Bob.

Thanks for clearing that up Bob521. Now it does make some sense to me. I think that the first girl knew that I was only there for fun, and as soon as she knew that black tooth was available she made the switch. I could tell that black tooth was a seasoned veteran who had a lot of AMP miles on her. The half wall situation usually doesn't bother me too much, but this time it was so annoying. The guy to the right of me wouldn't quit giving the girl instructions, it was like he was teaching her how to ride a bike. The guy across the hall sounded older and had a gruff voice and he was making such a production that I didn't know if he was having an orgasm or a heart attack. I wish I would have talked to the cute girl, but I was standing there saying goodbye to black tooth and getting my bottle of water. If anybody knows who the cute girl is, I would really appreciate some info on her. She had jet black hair that was pulled into a ponytail, very nice clean skin and a great smile. Also, she appeared to be around 25 or so, I would be willing to bet that she wasn't over 28. If anyone knows this mystery girl, please let me know. SaintChuck.

[George W. Bush]

The other thing you can do when there are half walls (just to amuse everybody) is to imitate Meg Ryan from the orgasm scene in the movie "When Harry Met Sally". Yes! Yes! Yes! Bob.

Would be even better if she were to play the part of van girl from Cheech & Chong's Up in Smoke. You step out of the room, the other mongers waiting clap and say "right on man! I didn't know you name was Alex. ".

[Bob521]

Yeah. Been there, but it was with my friend Lucy about 8 months ago. So there was no uncertainty. Afterword, I took her to lunch at Red Lobster (LOL) and she ate whatever the grand feast is called. Jesus, can she eat. She's about 35 and relatively cute, and really quite smart. We discussed strategies of investing in the stock market. Lucy is now at a place in LaGrange. HE only for guys she knows.

Anyway, here's the point of my reply. The Chinese places will take appointments. They (and I) actually prefer it. So as you were leaving, you should have asked the pretty girl's name and what days she works. As to the switch-er-roo, I expect that (a) they know why you are there, and (b) the woman you got first was new and perhaps would not do HE. Most places, you would be shit-out-of-luck, so I give them credit for bringing the other lady in. (c) The other possibility is you got the owner and she had no intention of giving you HE. But black tooth was busy. Instead of saying wait ten minutes, the owner starts you off. They know people will leave and not come back. Yeah. I hate the half walls too. I try to come early. Most places where I'm a regular, I come before they officially open. So the half-walls don't matter. The other thing you can do when there are half walls (just to amuse everybody) is to imitate Meg Ryan from the orgasm scene in the movie "When Harry Met Sally". Yes! Yes! Yes! Bob.

Tonight I went over to this place in Carol Stream http://chicago.backpage.com/Therapeu...-9370/22934331 . I walked up and rang the doorbell, and a little old Chinese lady in a winter coat opened the door and let me in. The little old lady took me to a room and I paid her for the hour. After a few minutes a fat Chinese woman with crazy hair came into the room and started my massage. This is where it get's strange and I have no clue what happened. After about 10 minutes she stopped the massage and left the room. I flipped over and I was all alone. A couple of minutes go by and some other woman comes in and she was trying to explain that she would finish the massage. She was giving me a pretty decent massage and then she started with the ass play. I don't understand what it is with these Chinese women and ass play. On the flip she started rubbing my chest and she kept smiling at me. Every time she smiled at me all I could do is stare at her big black dead tooth. I started rubbing her ass and she pulled up her sweater, she wasn't wearing a bra and she let me play with her small boobs. After a few minutes she gave me a textbook HJ and our session was over. As I was leaving I saw a really cute girl sitting at the desk and I said hi to her. She waived and said hi as I left. I wish that I would have had her for my session. I wouldn't go back to this place unless I knew that my session was going to be with the cutie I saw at the desk. I don't know how many girls work at this place, but I think that they are busy now because they put up all of those new fancy ad's. I know that they were busy because I heard at least 2 other guy's getting HJ's. That's right, another place with walls that don't go all the way to the ceiling. Nothing is worse than listening to the guy on the other side of the wall moaning and groaning. I won't go back to this place anytime soon. SaintChuck.

[SaintChuck]

Tonight I went over to this place in Carol Stream http://chicago.backpage.com/Therapeu...-9370/22934331 . I walked up and rang the doorbell, and a little old Chinese lady in a winter coat opened the door and let me in. The little old lady took me to a room and I paid her for the hour. After a few minutes a fat Chinese woman with crazy hair came into the room and started my massage. This is where it get's strange and I have no clue what happened. After about 10 minutes she stopped the massage and left the room. I flipped over and I was all alone. A couple of minutes go by and some other woman comes in and she was trying to explain that she would finish the massage. She was giving me a pretty decent massage and then she started with the ass play. I don't understand what it is with these Chinese women and ass play. On the flip she started rubbing my chest and she kept smiling at me. Every time she smiled at me all I could do is stare at her big black dead tooth. I started rubbing her ass and she pulled up her sweater, she wasn't wearing a bra and she let me play with her small boobs. After a few minutes she gave me a textbook HJ and our session was over. As I was leaving I saw a really cute girl sitting at the desk and I said hi to her. She waived and said hi as I left. I wish that I would have had her for my session. I wouldn't go back to this place unless I knew that my session was going to be with the cutie I saw at the desk. I don't know how many girls work at this place, but I think that they are busy now because they put up all of those new fancy ad's. I know that they were busy because I heard at least 2 other guy's getting HJ's. That's right, another place with walls that don't go all the way to the ceiling. Nothing is worse than listening to the guy on the other side of the wall moaning and groaning. I won't go back to this place anytime soon. SaintChuck.

[Cuda70]

I went to JJ and I didn't have any problems. I think her name was Amy. She gave one of the best massages that I ever received. She did want to know how much, I was going to tip her. And when she wanted too much money, I just turned her down. She kept trying to negotiate, but I wasnt giving her the satisfaction. I just enjoyed the good massage.

[WhiteRookDown]

Made a pre-game visit this past Sunday. Sky is in an office park on east side of Plum Grove Road. Very clean, very nice looking place. Tina, a decent looking woman with a fine rack, was my masseuse. An excellent time, as she is skilled, start to finish. My first visit there resulted in nothing more than a "thank you", but this visit ended in a very fine way. No shorting on time, no negotiating, no complaining about the tip. Another "thank you", a genuine hug, a smile, and it all made for a good time. There was another attractive woman working as well. They accept credit cards, and $105 total made a nice appetizer to last Sunday's NFL action.

[SaintChuck]

One place I never tried but have heard its a massage only place.

After my strikeout at JJ Massage in Schaumburg, which was back in May. I decided that I needed to start doing research before I just walked into these places blind. The following statements are my opinions that I have formed through extensive research. In Schaumburg there has to be at least a dozen AMP's, and they all advertise as if they are a must go to destination for Monger's. It seem's that only 2 of these AMP's would be worth your time, Healing Power Studio and Sky Spa. It seem's like there at least 10 places that want to lure you in with there ad's, but they will never deliver and there is no YMMV. Simply put, nothing is going to happen at these places. I am not going to break my neck to visit the 2 places that do offer extras, because I am not paying. 8 for an hour. I can go to the AMP's near me for. 6 for the hour and get the same service being offered in Schaumburg. It just doesn't seem like it would be worth the drive. SaintChuck.

[DMichaels69]

http://chicago.backpage.com/BodyRubs...ace-2/33333825

Visited for a short visit. Very nice lady. Not sure I'd repeat.

[DMichaels69]

One place I never tried but have heard its a massage only place.

You should feel lucky that anything happened at this place. This was the first place I ever got denied extra's. I have never heard of anyone getting anything from this place. On RM's it is reported as non-erotic and all of the reviews are from mongers who left unhappy. If you were lucky enough to get a HJ there, you can chalk that up as a victory. SaintChuck.

There's a place called Sun Spa. In an office park. Off Roselle Rd a bit south of Golf (if memory serves). I was there about a year ago. Left happy. But I said it was not worth a long drive. Yun, New Life, The place on Oakton (Asiana?) and Exercise are not terribly far from Schaumberg. Bob.

[DMichaels69]

When they want money, they transform into any one of many English poets. LOL.

You should feel lucky that anything happened at this place. This was the first place I ever got denied extra's. I have never heard of anyone getting anything from this place. On RM's it is reported as non-erotic and all of the reviews are from mongers who left unhappy. If you were lucky enough to get a HJ there, you can chalk that up as a victory. SaintChuck.

[Bob521]

There's a place called Sun Spa. In an office park. Off Roselle Rd a bit south of Golf (if memory serves). I was there about a year ago. Left happy. But I said it was not worth a long drive. Yun, New Life, The place on Oakton (Asiana?) and Exercise are not terribly far from Schaumberg. Bob.

You should feel lucky that anything happened at this place. This was the first place I ever got denied extra's. I have never heard of anyone getting anything from this place. On RM's it is reported as non-erotic and all of the reviews are from mongers who left unhappy. If you were lucky enough to get a HJ there, you can chalk that up as a victory. SaintChuck.

[SaintChuck]

I was starting to type this review and realize I sound like an old Neil Young song. You pay for this but they give you that.

A few days ago I try JJ Massage. Got a middle aged MT, maybe 45. I asked her name and after much difficult translation it comes out as Ye Ye. OK fine. So the massage was pretty good, a little teasing at the end. I tease back. On the flip things seem to be going good. I ask if she'll do a BJ and she give me a non-committal smile, and more teasing. But she then asks, in sign language, how much. I show 8, and she goes to more teasing, and I ask if that is OK, and she does more teasing. Getting frustrated, I just let her give the HJ, with the top pulled up but no snuggling of the fun bags is offered or accepted. All done, a clean up and a little more massage and I'm getting ready to go. I lay. 6 on the table, thinking I'm being generous for what I'd received. She calls my name and says 8. I say no, that was for the BJ, which she did not do. She says 8, and puts her arms around me for a big hug. Isn't that nice? And she says 8. I say goodbye.

Ye Ye's English went from bad to worse to pretty good, all depending on the subject at hand. Not going back. Still looking for a gem in the Schaumburg area.

You should feel lucky that anything happened at this place. This was the first place I ever got denied extra's. I have never heard of anyone getting anything from this place. On RM's it is reported as non-erotic and all of the reviews are from mongers who left unhappy. If you were lucky enough to get a HJ there, you can chalk that up as a victory. SaintChuck.

[Sam Spade]

I was starting to type this review and realize I sound like an old Neil Young song. You pay for this but they give you that.

A few days ago I try JJ Massage. Got a middle aged MT, maybe 45. I asked her name and after much difficult translation it comes out as Ye Ye. OK fine. So the massage was pretty good, a little teasing at the end. I tease back. On the flip things seem to be going good. I ask if she'll do a BJ and she give me a non-committal smile, and more teasing. But she then asks, in sign language, how much. I show 8, and she goes to more teasing, and I ask if that is OK, and she does more teasing. Getting frustrated, I just let her give the HJ, with the top pulled up but no snuggling of the fun bags is offered or accepted. All done, a clean up and a little more massage and I'm getting ready to go. I lay. 6 on the table, thinking I'm being generous for what I'd received. She calls my name and says 8. I say no, that was for the BJ, which she did not do. She says 8, and puts her arms around me for a big hug. Isn't that nice? And she says 8. I say goodbye.

Ye Ye's English went from bad to worse to pretty good, all depending on the subject at hand. Not going back. Still looking for a gem in the Schaumburg area.

[DMichaels69]

The last time a lady tried this I told her to stop as she was pushing too hard and I would have dropped a deuce.

It was like 20 years ago that I stopped at a Carol Stream AMP right off of Army Trail. The therapist was probably pushing 50, but did a really nice massage. She starts the HJ and I ask her what the rubber gloves on the table were for. "Some guys ask for funny thing" she says. Now I'd read about the male G-spot thing. So I ask if I can try. Without another word she grabbed a glove, put it on and stuck a finger in a jar of Vaseline and in she goes. She knew just what to do, slow in and out with a curl of the finger in between, all the time slowly stroking my rod with the free hand. And she took her time and made it last. I went back 3 times I think, then she got busted and the place closed. Since then I'll occasionally ask an MT for one, but it's never really good. Either they won't go deep, or I'm on the receiving end of what we used to call German porn. And of course they want an extra tip for that. I wouldn't mind it it was any good. But if I walk out of there feeling like Jodie Foster in The Accused, I won't be back. My old arse can't take that abuse.

[Kellster]

Kellster, I would like to know how it could have been worse. I was bitten, I had an MX missile launched up my butt, and for good measure she tried to burn my genital's off. I can't think of much else that could have gone wrong. SaintChuck.

It could have been worse if I was the one she did that too haha! Just kidding! Hang in there Saint Chuck.