Escort Reports

[Beam Me Up]

I have seen her ads up for about 20 years. I never guessed she was in her eighties. My hat is off to you. I could not have completed this mission.

Good day, my brothers up north. I was visiting your fine city a week ago, and decided to partake of the local scene. I was looking for something different, something unique, something I would probably never ever do again. And thank you Cleveland, you delivered. I saw an ad for a Mistress Joan. In the ad, she claims to be around fifty, but someone online reviewed her, and said she was over 80. That's like a midget, or pregnant girl, you don't get one of those very often. She's not the greatest looker, the photos make it look like she's had botox, and a lot of surgery. That could be. I wouldn't rule it out. But they are also grainy enough that you probably could think 50's. The ad promised things like DATY, GFE, and Multiple Pops, so I was like, what the f**k, I'm in, and soon I was on my way to the east side, just off 480.

Her building is like a maze, it was a walk to find her, with a lot of people, including a weird college girl who were wondering why I was there. I knocked and said "Hi Auntie, it's me John. " and the door opened up. The apartment looks like an old lady lives there. A lot of really old things, and decorated in a way that would have been awesome in 1975. And then the lights come on. HOLY FRAK, she's old! And a bit frail looking too. No problem, I'm into eating chips and breaking hips, let's get to the fun stuff! She shows me down the hall I see a bedroom on the left, nope, not there. We go to the back room. I can't even describe the fettish stuff that's back there. There was something that looked like a studded 2-liter bottle which she picked up and asked if I like stuff up my ass. Nah, pass. There are cuffs, whips, masks, all kinds of stuff, and that's when I notice Mistress Joan is a kinky little thing. She has a very long leather bench and asks me to sit down on it and "Make myself comfortable. " Which I do. I tell her I basically want a simple slap and tickle with her, and she's good with that. DATY, not happening though, she "doesn't know where I've been. " No fingering, no anal, and she won't let you be above her. I guess someone laid down on her too hard once, and broke some bones. No joke, this lady is fragile, and needs a lot of calcium supplements. I was hoping to leave her with some protein, but she would only do it wrapped. No worries.

As she's removing her clothing, I mention the add and say "Someone online said you were in your 80's. " to which she replied "I am in my 80's. I'm 86. " FRAK ME! This lady has 50 years on me! The old lady clothes start to come off, and she's in a leather bra and panties underneath. Nice. The body, it's got some road wear, but she handles it well. The panties come off first, surprisingly, no gray hairs. Natural red. Then the bra comes off. My first thought, I can see the light coming through the window, through her breasts. Her skin is so thin, the light illuminates the implants. I wanted to be a five year old and hold a flashlight against one of them to see if I could make the room light up in the dark, when I noticed that I didn't see any nipples. They're usually there, kind of pointing at you, judgmentally. But I had to look around to find hers. Turns out, the large implants forced those little suckers into hiding, and they were under the breasts, pointing straight down. She let me suck on them for a while, and every time I went for the pussy, it was a no go. It was also weird that she was talking to me about her grandson while stroking me off.

Soon, I got her on her back, laid out on the leather bench. Ok, for 86, she's got a nice pooch. And it still got wet naturally from what I felt on the outside. She added a little more lube, and it was off to pound town. I asked her to talk dirty, she did, and I was soon going full speed on her surprisingly tight octogenarian tweeter. It took some willpower and forcing myself to do it, but I completed the mission, and was soon lying on the table ready to go again. No multiple pops. That ad lied!

Overall, I've had a lot worse, and I've had a lot better. But as far as unique experiences go, it was worth trying once. YMMV. Thanks Cleveland.

Photo attached of what a Mistress Joan might look like.

[ThatGuy805]

I need a recommendation on a safe escort thanks guys.

[HnJust]

Any other countries do vacation wives?

[HnJust]

Sounds like it was definitely a different experience, and a full discription.

[Lancelot Link]

Ghosted me for a 230 appt. That was set thru txt at 1230. I even confirmed at 2 that I was leaving and would see her at 230. Hotel on snow, I parked next door at the restaurant. No response from txt or when I called. She should atleast have the decency to cancel when I txt'd at 2 and then drove 30 min for nothing. I'm starting to really hate all these women and the shit they make us go through to see their loser, drugged up ass's in there shithole hotels and ghetto shithole neighborhoods...and lets not forget, being on constant alert when their neck/face tattoo'd methhead boyfriends and knuckle draggin pimps are around, which always ruins a date when you spot them nearby.I've had nothin but badluck lately..smh.

[LowRider69]

Good day, my brothers up north. I was visiting your fine city a week ago, and decided to partake of the local scene. I was looking for something different, something unique, something I would probably never ever do again. And thank you Cleveland, you delivered. I saw an ad for a Mistress Joan. In the ad, she claims to be around fifty, but someone online reviewed her, and said she was over 80. That's like a midget, or pregnant girl, you don't get one of those very often. She's not the greatest looker, the photos make it look like she's had botox, and a lot of surgery. That could be. I wouldn't rule it out. But they are also grainy enough that you probably could think 50's. The ad promised things like DATY, GFE, and Multiple Pops, so I was like, what the f**k, I'm in, and soon I was on my way to the east side, just off 480.

Her building is like a maze, it was a walk to find her, with a lot of people, including a weird college girl who were wondering why I was there. I knocked and said "Hi Auntie, it's me John. " and the door opened up. The apartment looks like an old lady lives there. A lot of really old things, and decorated in a way that would have been awesome in 1975. And then the lights come on. HOLY FRAK, she's old! And a bit frail looking too. No problem, I'm into eating chips and breaking hips, let's get to the fun stuff! She shows me down the hall I see a bedroom on the left, nope, not there. We go to the back room. I can't even describe the fettish stuff that's back there. There was something that looked like a studded 2-liter bottle which she picked up and asked if I like stuff up my ass. Nah, pass. There are cuffs, whips, masks, all kinds of stuff, and that's when I notice Mistress Joan is a kinky little thing. She has a very long leather bench and asks me to sit down on it and "Make myself comfortable. " Which I do. I tell her I basically want a simple slap and tickle with her, and she's good with that. DATY, not happening though, she "doesn't know where I've been. " No fingering, no anal, and she won't let you be above her. I guess someone laid down on her too hard once, and broke some bones. No joke, this lady is fragile, and needs a lot of calcium supplements. I was hoping to leave her with some protein, but she would only do it wrapped. No worries.

As she's removing her clothing, I mention the add and say "Someone online said you were in your 80's. " to which she replied "I am in my 80's. I'm 86. " FRAK ME! This lady has 50 years on me! The old lady clothes start to come off, and she's in a leather bra and panties underneath. Nice. The body, it's got some road wear, but she handles it well. The panties come off first, surprisingly, no gray hairs. Natural red. Then the bra comes off. My first thought, I can see the light coming through the window, through her breasts. Her skin is so thin, the light illuminates the implants. I wanted to be a five year old and hold a flashlight against one of them to see if I could make the room light up in the dark, when I noticed that I didn't see any nipples. They're usually there, kind of pointing at you, judgmentally. But I had to look around to find hers. Turns out, the large implants forced those little suckers into hiding, and they were under the breasts, pointing straight down. She let me suck on them for a while, and every time I went for the pussy, it was a no go. It was also weird that she was talking to me about her grandson while stroking me off.

Soon, I got her on her back, laid out on the leather bench. Ok, for 86, she's got a nice pooch. And it still got wet naturally from what I felt on the outside. She added a little more lube, and it was off to pound town. I asked her to talk dirty, she did, and I was soon going full speed on her surprisingly tight octogenarian tweeter. It took some willpower and forcing myself to do it, but I completed the mission, and was soon lying on the table ready to go again. No multiple pops. That ad lied!

Overall, I've had a lot worse, and I've had a lot better. But as far as unique experiences go, it was worth trying once. YMMV. Thanks Cleveland.

Photo attached of what a Mistress Joan might look like.

Now that we are in the Halloween season, your report was timely. Thanks freak.

[LowRider69]

I gave my two cents on her when she first started a few months ago as she received a few positive reports. Her not having any consideration for someone that confirmed an appointment just 1 1/2 hours away and drove to her house sounds like the girl I know, as I knew her from years ago. She is one of the better ones that can fake the nice act but eventually the real personality comes out. I would just laugh at some of the posts that would say she was sweet. She, along with most of these girls do not care about our time or us. If someone else offers her more she would stiff the person she confirmed the appointment to. That is probably what happened. These girls need to be called out that do this.

She was on my try list even though I was aware of this issue. Same result. Seemed intentional to me. Once they go downhill they never recover.

[Kdoc13]

Good day, my brothers up north. I was visiting your fine city a week ago, and decided to partake of the local scene. I was looking for something different, something unique, something I would probably never ever do again. And thank you Cleveland, you delivered. I saw an ad for a Mistress Joan. In the ad, she claims to be around fifty, but someone online reviewed her, and said she was over 80. That's like a midget, or pregnant girl, you don't get one of those very often. She's not the greatest looker, the photos make it look like she's had botox, and a lot of surgery. That could be. I wouldn't rule it out. But they are also grainy enough that you probably could think 50's. The ad promised things like DATY, GFE, and Multiple Pops, so I was like, what the f**k, I'm in, and soon I was on my way to the east side, just off 480.

Her building is like a maze, it was a walk to find her, with a lot of people, including a weird college girl who were wondering why I was there. I knocked and said "Hi Auntie, it's me John. " and the door opened up. The apartment looks like an old lady lives there. A lot of really old things, and decorated in a way that would have been awesome in 1975. And then the lights come on. HOLY FRAK, she's old! And a bit frail looking too. No problem, I'm into eating chips and breaking hips, let's get to the fun stuff! She shows me down the hall I see a bedroom on the left, nope, not there. We go to the back room. I can't even describe the fettish stuff that's back there. There was something that looked like a studded 2-liter bottle which she picked up and asked if I like stuff up my ass. Nah, pass. There are cuffs, whips, masks, all kinds of stuff, and that's when I notice Mistress Joan is a kinky little thing. She has a very long leather bench and asks me to sit down on it and "Make myself comfortable. " Which I do. I tell her I basically want a simple slap and tickle with her, and she's good with that. DATY, not happening though, she "doesn't know where I've been. " No fingering, no anal, and she won't let you be above her. I guess someone laid down on her too hard once, and broke some bones. No joke, this lady is fragile, and needs a lot of calcium supplements. I was hoping to leave her with some protein, but she would only do it wrapped. No worries.

As she's removing her clothing, I mention the add and say "Someone online said you were in your 80's. " to which she replied "I am in my 80's. I'm 86. " FRAK ME! This lady has 50 years on me! The old lady clothes start to come off, and she's in a leather bra and panties underneath. Nice. The body, it's got some road wear, but she handles it well. The panties come off first, surprisingly, no gray hairs. Natural red. Then the bra comes off. My first thought, I can see the light coming through the window, through her breasts. Her skin is so thin, the light illuminates the implants. I wanted to be a five year old and hold a flashlight against one of them to see if I could make the room light up in the dark, when I noticed that I didn't see any nipples. They're usually there, kind of pointing at you, judgmentally. But I had to look around to find hers. Turns out, the large implants forced those little suckers into hiding, and they were under the breasts, pointing straight down. She let me suck on them for a while, and every time I went for the pussy, it was a no go. It was also weird that she was talking to me about her grandson while stroking me off.

Soon, I got her on her back, laid out on the leather bench. Ok, for 86, she's got a nice pooch. And it still got wet naturally from what I felt on the outside. She added a little more lube, and it was off to pound town. I asked her to talk dirty, she did, and I was soon going full speed on her surprisingly tight octogenarian tweeter. It took some willpower and forcing myself to do it, but I completed the mission, and was soon lying on the table ready to go again. No multiple pops. That ad lied!

Overall, I've had a lot worse, and I've had a lot better. But as far as unique experiences go, it was worth trying once. YMMV. Thanks Cleveland.

Photo attached of what a Mistress Joan might look like.

[JaggOff]

Planning my next trip to Thailand, likely mid-November. Establishing a connection using ThaiFriendly to select a companion. I've migrated toward the strategy of finding a "holiday wife. " I get an enthusiastic and shapely young lady willing to do anything for me, in or out of bed, for $35-70 per day plus meals and incidentals. Get spoiled rotten with a sexy girl fetching, cooking, making you a drink, massage, sex on demand using orifice (s) of choice. The courting and planning is half the fun. Thinking of packing some bondage gear this time just for giggles.

I hate you.

[Polishboy]

May have to try this one out.

http://cleveland.skipthegames.com/ma...b/468080057623

[MrSmith1969]

This ones a scammer and a thief. Shit neighborhood off Harvard Ave. Hood rats everywhere makes it tough to remedy. Avoid at all costs.

https://cleveland.skipthegames.com/f...r/397436601046

Thanks boss,

[TopDecker577]

http://cleveland.skipthegames.com/fe...s/332228859271

But YMMV. Not sure how she is now since I last saw her; she was a good time then. She's been an avid frequenter on Seekingarrangements. I'd wager that things probably have gotten desperate for her to be on STG, so as always, just be careful going into things.

Notice some of her pictures show large cysts and sores on her arms. Use protection.

[TheEndlessEdge]

Saw a positive report here previously; anyone else seen her since? With the way these girls fluctuate in service nowadays I just figure it's good to double check.

http://cleveland.skipthegames.com/fe...y/225194290337

[GlennF]

Does anyone have info on her?

She looks like fun.

https://escortindex.com/ad/cleveland...8964/1/1182384

https://milfy.com.cleveland.listcraw...post/37104127/

[Franklee1975]

This ones a scammer and a thief. Shit neighborhood off Harvard Ave. Hood rats everywhere makes it tough to remedy. Avoid at all costs.

https://cleveland.skipthegames.com/f...r/397436601046