Humaniplex 411 & Reviews

[Krayanne]

Any Intel on Jessie Parker.

https://www.humaniplex.com/profiles/JessieParker

[RogerOver]

Exotic1 Celine is easily my worst experience, and I've had some pretty bad ones. Based on my experience, I consider her a rob. I cannot comprehend how she has no reds on HX. I think dudes are cowards and scared of her because she's level 3 and has been around a long time.

Pics: She looks nothing like her pictures. They're old and / or photoshopped. Maybe she used to look like that years ago when she was younger before she put on weight. Her tits, despite having implants, are saggy and unattractive. She has a large gut. Her face looks pretty old and burned out. She uses huge fake lashes that are pretty crusty. I've never actually bolted from a session before, so I tried to power through. Big mistake.

She advertises GFE dfk daty bbj cim 69 msog Hhr 170.

"Service": She texted me her room number at 10:58 pm and I arrived a few minutes after that, maybe 11:03 pm. It started out fine. She did light DFK. She did a BBBJ that was decent for a very short time basically the minimum to get me hard, then reached for the condom. She started with cowgirl but again, for a very short time. She didn't move much and I didn't feel much of anything. Then she immediately wanted to switch to missionary. Red flag, but at this point my main concern was just making sure I could stay hard and penetrate enough so I could feel something through the condom, so I was fine to switch to mish temporarily. Unfortunately missionary is very unflattering for her. Her fake tits sag to the sides bad, and her gut dominates. It's not a good view. She also does this horrible hooker move where she pulls her legs together to stop you from penetrating deeply, but when I gently spread her legs, she didn't fight me on it. She also starts asking me to cum right away. Groan.

Missionary absolutely wasn't working for me, so I asked to switch to doggy. Doggy is usually the savior of ugly women. So she assumes the position and I think "this could work", but she angles her pussy down so I can't get in. I think she's old and experienced enough to know exactly what she was doing. I try to get her to come up more, but she's acting like she doesn't know what to do. I then try to get her to just lie down flat since I know I can get in that way. She outright refuses, saying she doesn't do that. Uhhhh okkkaaayyyy. She flips over back into missionary. At this point I'm basically limp. So I figure I need to salvage this somehow, and suggest she do a handjob. She seemed pretty happy about that. I sit down and she squats in front of me and starts a handjob, which is fine. I could have probably finished if she just put in some effort. Unfortunately, after a couple minutes, she says "cum, my hand is getting tired". WTF? So obviously that's a turn off. Sure enough, a minute later, she just stops. She says something like "you want to finish up?" meaning. That I jack myself off. The fuck?

The Argument: So at this point I haven't given up completely, so I say "okay I guess just lie on your back again". She says she only had 1 condom. Obvious lie. She then says she has another appointment. Another obvious lie. She says she's done enough, and she openly says she's getting offended. It's clear as day that she's picking a fight in order to end the session. I go get my phone to check the time. It's 11:15 pm. It hasn't even been 15 minutes. I point out that we aren't even half way, I paid for a HH. She argues that she is "GFE" and that means spending a lot of time talking, not having sex. That's. Not what GFE means. So she won't fuck, she won't do a handjob, she won't do anything. When I go to grab my pants to get dressed, you can see an absolute wave of satisfaction hit her and she says something like "that's what I thought. " Imagine being happy about robbing a dude when it's literally your job to make him cum. I didn't get remotely what I paid for. Hell, if I walked in and a pimp put a gun in my face and took my $170, I'd be happier, because at least then I wouldn't have the shame of having debased myself.

Women like this ruin the hobby. This hobby is about paying for good experiences. These women are robs, just "soft" robs who use whining, complaining, picking fights, and refusal to perform after they've "done enough" to try to justify their rob. I had a similar bad attitude from LovelyxoJasmine, but at least she used accurate pictures, was hot enough to keep my dick hard, and I legitimately enjoyed fucking her doggy to the point she got me to cum. Exotic1 Celine is 10 x worse. She shouldn't be doing this job at all.

Thanks for that very honest review. Someone must have mentioned it to her. She took her pics down.

Exotic1 Celine

[PewpHead]

Exotic1 Celine is easily my worst experience, and I've had some pretty bad ones. Based on my experience, I consider her a rob. I cannot comprehend how she has no reds on HX. I think dudes are cowards and scared of her because she's level 3 and has been around a long time.

Pics: She looks nothing like her pictures. They're old and / or photoshopped. Maybe she used to look like that years ago when she was younger before she put on weight. Her tits, despite having implants, are saggy and unattractive. She has a large gut. Her face looks pretty old and burned out. She uses huge fake lashes that are pretty crusty. I've never actually bolted from a session before, so I tried to power through. Big mistake.

She advertises GFE dfk daty bbj cim 69 msog Hhr 170.

"Service": She texted me her room number at 10:58 pm and I arrived a few minutes after that, maybe 11:03 pm. It started out fine. She did light DFK. She did a BBBJ that was decent for a very short time basically the minimum to get me hard, then reached for the condom. She started with cowgirl but again, for a very short time. She didn't move much and I didn't feel much of anything. Then she immediately wanted to switch to missionary. Red flag, but at this point my main concern was just making sure I could stay hard and penetrate enough so I could feel something through the condom, so I was fine to switch to mish temporarily. Unfortunately missionary is very unflattering for her. Her fake tits sag to the sides bad, and her gut dominates. It's not a good view. She also does this horrible hooker move where she pulls her legs together to stop you from penetrating deeply, but when I gently spread her legs, she didn't fight me on it. She also starts asking me to cum right away. Groan.

Missionary absolutely wasn't working for me, so I asked to switch to doggy. Doggy is usually the savior of ugly women. So she assumes the position and I think "this could work", but she angles her pussy down so I can't get in. I think she's old and experienced enough to know exactly what she was doing. I try to get her to come up more, but she's acting like she doesn't know what to do. I then try to get her to just lie down flat since I know I can get in that way. She outright refuses, saying she doesn't do that. Uhhhh okkkaaayyyy. She flips over back into missionary. At this point I'm basically limp. So I figure I need to salvage this somehow, and suggest she do a handjob. She seemed pretty happy about that. I sit down and she squats in front of me and starts a handjob, which is fine. I could have probably finished if she just put in some effort. Unfortunately, after a couple minutes, she says "cum, my hand is getting tired". WTF? So obviously that's a turn off. Sure enough, a minute later, she just stops. She says something like "you want to finish up?" meaning. That I jack myself off. The fuck?

The Argument: So at this point I haven't given up completely, so I say "okay I guess just lie on your back again". She says she only had 1 condom. Obvious lie. She then says she has another appointment. Another obvious lie. She says she's done enough, and she openly says she's getting offended. It's clear as day that she's picking a fight in order to end the session. I go get my phone to check the time. It's 11:15 pm. It hasn't even been 15 minutes. I point out that we aren't even half way, I paid for a HH. She argues that she is "GFE" and that means spending a lot of time talking, not having sex. That's. Not what GFE means. So she won't fuck, she won't do a handjob, she won't do anything. When I go to grab my pants to get dressed, you can see an absolute wave of satisfaction hit her and she says something like "that's what I thought. " Imagine being happy about robbing a dude when it's literally your job to make him cum. I didn't get remotely what I paid for. Hell, if I walked in and a pimp put a gun in my face and took my $170, I'd be happier, because at least then I wouldn't have the shame of having debased myself.

Women like this ruin the hobby. This hobby is about paying for good experiences. These women are robs, just "soft" robs who use whining, complaining, picking fights, and refusal to perform after they've "done enough" to try to justify their rob. I had a similar bad attitude from LovelyxoJasmine, but at least she used accurate pictures, was hot enough to keep my dick hard, and I legitimately enjoyed fucking her doggy to the point she got me to cum. Exotic1 Celine is 10 x worse. She shouldn't be doing this job at all.

[Ihaschzbrgr]

Enclave crew, opted for the hhr to give her a try since I couldn't find any other reviews.

The pictures are a little deceiving, she is a little curvier than depicted but she wears it well since it's proportionate to her D's. Cute face, maybe 5' tall. Sloppy BBBJ and onto CG (my fave) where I love to short myself on time by finishing quick. Just got to let it happen when the pressures buildin. Short convo and was out $$. 2 would I repeat? Probably not as I'm still trying to sample some of the legends (just missed sarasmiles and some other legends).

[OrgeToriX]

Good evening fellow mongers. Had a date the other day in OC with annamarie, she is still decent looking while her pics on her account are old, and her bio claims "athletic build" that may have been 2 years ago. She is a lot pudgy now and looks about 30 lbs heavier, nothing wrong with that if that's your thing. But figured I'd give some intel in case anyone is expecting to give her a visit and expect her to look like her pics. Anyways that's my rant, stay safe fellas and always make good judgement and trust your instincts.

I've seen her a few times. I think she's good for a quickie now and then. Her "athletic build" is definitely from more than 2 years ago. I've seen her 4 times over the years and the last time was kinda weird. I just went for a BnG and she actually was blowing on my dick. Like she was bobbing up and down and also blowing. Very strange.

[Chapeau1]

I think our lovely Jade has hung it up.

PD profile is no longer active and she hasn't been on HX in months.

She was one of the best, those eyes when she would gag on my cock. Sublime.

[DcStatic]

Good evening fellow mongers. Had a date the other day in OC with annamarie, she is still decent looking while her pics on her account are old, and her bio claims "athletic build" that may have been 2 years ago. She is a lot pudgy now and looks about 30 lbs heavier, nothing wrong with that if that's your thing. But figured I'd give some intel in case anyone is expecting to give her a visit and expect her to look like her pics. Anyways that's my rant, stay safe fellas and always make good judgement and trust your instincts.

[CyberPunk2083]

Her number seems to be dead and she isn't responding on HX. Anyone got a phone number?

[GuysTT2]

Enchantingdahlia is formerly known as collettesgarden. There is a ton of existing info on her.

Incorrect. 2 totally different people and "Colletesgarden: has a stable. Dahlia is part of that stable and she is the same person is DAHLIAS profile. There is a Collette that exists, huge tits and she has her own profile now. Can't remember but she is talked about here.

[TheZorak]

Enchantingdahlia is formerly known as collettesgarden. There is a ton of existing info on her.

Wut she has that and VenusDivine going on at the same time?

[Justify]

They're both part of the baby crew. You weren't texting or PMing with either of them. You were communicating with the booker. The booker is the one that didn't rate you back. She was texting the booker at the end to let him know you were on your way out. The booker also removes pics for some girls when they aren't working. Every girl in that group sends the text that's something like "my door will be open, please don't knock. " When it's time to go up. Enchantingdahlia is formerly known as collettesgarden. There is a ton of existing info on her.

Thank you for the intel I really appreciate that.

[HoeWhisperer]

Could not decide between the two a few nights back, postings were similar and at the same time along with similar pricing options, so I went with Alexa who has a distinctive tattoo on her thigh, met her at an upscale hotel near the university here in OC, Dahlia had a location near the Kingdom. Anyhow Alexa scared me a bit when she pushed the time back when I got there and finally said come up and enter without knocking which I know from a previous experience is a good way to get robbed. So I told her I would text when I was at the door so she could open it for me. The girl at the door was her but the face pictures didn't quite match, the thigh picture did. She was good at DFK, and was fun to DATY and even 69, finished in the time allotted but when the time was up she went to the phone and started on her next appointment. Probably won't get a return visit even though her rate was reasonable. I left her a very good rating, but she did not reciprocate. Funny thing is her and Dahlia's pictures and listing both disappeared the next morning. Coincidence. I don't think so. YMMV.

They're both part of the baby crew. You weren't texting or PMing with either of them. You were communicating with the booker. The booker is the one that didn't rate you back. She was texting the booker at the end to let him know you were on your way out. The booker also removes pics for some girls when they aren't working. Every girl in that group sends the text that's something like "my door will be open, please don't knock. " When it's time to go up. Enchantingdahlia is formerly known as collettesgarden. There is a ton of existing info on her.

[Justify]

Could not decide between the two a few nights back, postings were similar and at the same time along with similar pricing options, so I went with Alexa who has a distinctive tattoo on her thigh, met her at an upscale hotel near the university here in OC, Dahlia had a location near the Kingdom. Anyhow Alexa scared me a bit when she pushed the time back when I got there and finally said come up and enter without knocking which I know from a previous experience is a good way to get robbed. So I told her I would text when I was at the door so she could open it for me. The girl at the door was her but the face pictures didn't quite match, the thigh picture did. She was good at DFK, and was fun to DATY and even 69, finished in the time allotted but when the time was up she went to the phone and started on her next appointment. Probably won't get a return visit even though her rate was reasonable. I left her a very good rating, but she did not reciprocate. Funny thing is her and Dahlia's pictures and listing both disappeared the next morning. Coincidence. I don't think so. YMMV.

[MR Nimbus]

Any feedback from the crew?

[MR Nimbus]

https://www.humaniplex.com/profiles/ChristinaM

Recently saw this girl again. First time was pre-covid. She is hot. Tall, big ass, thick legs. Breasts are all natural and perky as hell. Not a petite spinner. Probably 5'10". But not fat, just a thick tall woman. Long black hair and a distinctive pretty face with nice makeup on. Does not have GND look. If you saw her outside dressed up, she would turn heads. But I understand a big girl is not for everyone. A lot of guys see a tall, thick girl and are like I don't want to fuck with no Amazon.

She is Eastern European and has a cute accent. I find her to be friendly and inviting. A lot of guys say she is all looks and no action. I got DFK, BBBJ, and various positions. Pussy got juicy and creamy both time. We had fun. YMMV as always I guess.

These girls are human too and sometimes you click with them. I guess we clicked. Could be she sees a lot of guys in day and there is diminishing performance? Who knows. I had fun by my opinion seems to be in the minority.

I had the same, I was blown away actually that usually doesn't happen to me due to pics being some what deceiving. She's a straight up smoking hot volleyball player! Watching her suck me off in the mirror was just some fantasy shit it was hard to grasp. I saw her in the morning time she was all game, like mentioned YMMV and if she's already been dick down 5 times don't expect a freak out of her this should be common sense with any gal. If that pussy ain't getting wet than either two things she ain't very into you or that puss is tap for the day at that point you better get to eating and slobber on that box or if she's a seasoned veteran she'll bust the lube out on you.