2000-2004 Archived Reports

[Jurassic]

Thanks DC in SB for your reply. I'm wondering what the going rates are for these escorts in SB. Years ago I seem to recall them expecting 120 for a half hour, 160 an hour just to get them, before tip. I was ripped off a couple of times, by some time bandits that bailed before time was up. Also a lot of hassle, they just wanted to strip for cash. I think the girls were too nervous about what they were doing. At least AMP girls are on their turf, and feel comfortable.

Re:"Real crime" in SB. I'm glad we live in town that is generally safe. I have noticed LE is always cruising down Haley st. Are there still drug deals going on? Years ago there was crack dealing.

I seldom bother with Haley since female SWs are almost nonexistent, aside from Frances.

Why are people in such a rush on the 101 freeway??
I like to cruise 70-75 mph in the middle lane and tons of SUVs are always whipping by 80 - 90 mph.

I (age 37) think it's awfully dangerous with those quick lane changes. Perhaps LE could start enforcing the speed limit on the 101. That would keep LE busy enough for awhile. Then people would chill out at 70 again.

That's my 3 cents for today.

[BigGuy]

I have to agree with Raybones a little bit.

The problem with SB is, there is no "REAL" crime out there. The cops do too good of a job busting the minors out after curfew and the "Drunk in public" at 2:01 am on State street.

If this town had real crime, like L.A. or NYC, then the cops would be too busy to bother with the AMPs.

We are just going to have to wait until the next place opens up and hit it early and often until the cops bust it too.

Just my 2 cents, Good luck, BIGGUY

[Air Cooled]

Put the bottle down and try to read the post thoroughly before you hurl your wadded up panties in accusation. I guess humor goes past you, just as success has.

[raybones99]

With the prescence of cops in your city there is no problem with any crime.

To be fair to LE?????

Give me a break.

Haven't seen any posts from you in the past or info???

Gang bangers or psychotic parolees??? In Santa Barbara?? Do you get out much???

Just keep this info to yourself "OFFICER" Air cooled.

[Air Cooled]

To be fair to LE, I'd much rather bask in the presence of lovelies and get a little action than to go out and risk my ass getting shot by gang bangers and psychotic parolees.

It's easier to remove baby oil stains than it is blood stains.

[DCinSB]

Gents,

I check in here every so often but usually don't have a lot to contribute because I rarely play at the MPs and never, ever play with SWs. I am more of an escort guy and escorts of any worth are lacking in this area. Between me and a few friends, I can answer Jurassic's questions.

1. El Mercado AMP. As of Friday, it is still in operation. If I am not mistaken, it is just inside SB City limits so they may be a little gunshy. You have to bring your own condom but there is an adult bookshop within walking distance.

2. The Sexy Masseuse. I just called her today and got her voice mail. I am 90% sure that I recognize her voice as an FBSM gal who has been around for a while now. If it is her she is an overweight and unenthusiastic African American gal in her late 20's. Works out of hotels near downtown Goleta. Avoid.

3. Tina, Divine Relaxation. She's been around forever. Older woman. Don't know anyone who has seen her.

4. Laughter Therapy. The Laughter Therapy thing is a new tag line. She's been in town for a few months. Excellent FBSM. Very cool lady. Redhead, beautiful face, enormous ass. If you like the BBW thing, you should see her. She's way out at the ass end of Goleta.

5. Hannah - Don't know anyone who has seen her but she has an ad in ThatMall, FBSM section, under the name Sara. Very pretty, older, blonde bombshell.

Hope this helps,

DC

[raybones99]

Why is it that the cops always concentrate on the "asian massage" places?
They never go after any of the other ads in the paper. Come on guys solve some real crimes as we know you're also reading this board.
So long Magic Care and it looks like I won' be stopping by in SB any more for action.

[Jurassic]

I'm noticing more individual providers advertising massage in the Classified ads in the Newspress. Does anyone have any reports on these gals??

One ad proclaims, "the Sexy Masseuse." How about massage by Tina, Diving Relaxation. Laughter Therapy, Full Body Ma. Hannah - "Expensive and worth it."

It's a shame about Magic Care closing. Even if they reopen they'll be cautious or legit.

Finally is that place in El Mercado still open?

Just wondering what's going on in this expensive town of ours!

[Tsboy69]

Stopped by Magic Care today. Sign on the door states they are closed due to construction. There also was a number written in to call for more info - 805/899-2777. I called and got a answering maching immediately. Too bad!

[Tsboy69]

Tried the SM CAMP last week. Had the same great massage and the same bad acting, squirming away Cindy. Same result as the other two times. $40+$40 = 3 strikes, yer out!

[Guide Lover]

Arrest made at local massage parlor
By: Matt Cota

Police have broke up an alleged house of prostitution in Santa Barbara.

After a month long investigation, detectives served a search warrant at the Magic Care Center on Chapala Street late Wednesday. 40-year old Mei Yan Chen was arrested for soliciting prostitution to an undercover police officer.

"It's appropriate to identify and take appropriate enforcement action when we hear about these operations," says Lt. Paul McCaffrey, of the Santa Barbara Police Department.

Another woman was cited for performing massages without a permit. The owner of the business, Jin Hang Guidry, worked for a similar operation that was shut down by the city four years ago. Investigators say more charges and arrests could follow.

[Tsboy69]

Big Guy,

Checked out the KEYT website as well as the Santa Barbara News Press (www.newspress.com) sites and could not find any mention. Any link to details?

I was heading to Santa Barbara next week and was looking forward to a visit to Magic care, oh well, any suggestions?

[BigGuy]

This just in,

A friend of mine, and fellow monger, told me he saw a special report on "Magic Care Center" getting busted.

It was on KEYT news the other nite. Apparently after a "month long investigation" they were shut down for "suspicion of prostitution".

Looks like another one bites the dust. I guess we were lucky it lasted this long!!

Good luck, BIGGUY

[Jurassic]

Hey fellas, is J.C. still at Magic Care? I tend to go to Oxnard, to save some coin.

Anyway, thought you guys might appreciate this comprehensive list of Abbreviations written up by Ampfinder.


Since many people have problems with abbreviations, I thought you guys wouldnt mind me
putting up a list. There is one here on the website but guys never seem to find it. These are
abbreviations that I have seen posted around the website.

AAMP = Apartment Asian Massage Parlor. Based in a residential apartment instead of a
commercial storefront.
AMP = Asian Massage Parlor
Asian = rimming = licking anus
Asian Cowgirl = girl on top, squatting
ASP = Adult Service Provider, or alt.sex.prostitution newsgroup
ASW = Asian Street Walker
ATF = all time favorite
ATM = ass to mouth
BJ = blow job = oral sex = fellatio
BBBJ = bare back blow job = BJ without condom
BBBJTC = bare back blow job to completion
BBBJTCWS = bare back blow job to completion with swallow
BBFS = bare back sex
BBW = big beautiful woman
BFE = boy friend experience (If you need to know this then you are on the wrong freaking
website).
BLS = ball licking and sucking
BSW = Black Street Walkder
BTW = by the way
CBJ = covered blow job = BJ with condom
CFS = covered full service = Sex with condom
CIM = cum in mouth
CL = craigslist.org
CMT = Certified Massage Therapist. A professional masseuse.
Cowgirl = girl on top
DATY = dining at the y = cunnilingus
Doubles = A threesome with two providers
DDE = doesn't do extras (PS only)
DDG = drop dead gorgeous
DFK = deep french kissing
DIY = do it yourself (masturbation)
DT = deep throat
EOM = end of message. No text in message body.
FBSM = full body sensual massage
FKK = Frei Körper Kultur. German brothel / nudist club.
French = BJ
French Kiss = Kissing with tongue insertion
FS = full service = BJ + Sex
Get Comfortable = get completely naked
GFE = girlfriend experience. Typically BBBJ, CFS, DFK, DATY, and MSOG
GG = Golden Gypsy. defunct Berkeley massage parlor
GND = girl next door
Greek = anal sex, back door
GS = golden shower = urination
Hat = condom
HJ = hand job = a manual / hand release
HME = honeymoon experience, lapdog heaven
HSW = Hispanic Street Walker
HWP = height and weight proportionate
IMHO = in my humble opinion
Italian = penis rubbing between butt cheeks
ISO = in search of
KAMP = Korean Asian Massage Parlor
Lapdog = person who worships providers to excess.
LE = law enforcement
LSW = Latina Street Walker
LK = light kissing
MBR = multiple bell ringing
MILF = mom I'd like to f-ck
Mish = missionary position, or the SF Mission District
Missionary = man on top
MSOG = mulitple shots on goal
OWO = oral without condom
OWOTC = oral without condom to completion
PIV = penis in vagina
PL = Pathetic Loser
PS = Private Show (Dance)
PSE = Porn Star Experience
PV = private viewing (Dance)
RMP = Russian Massage Parlor
ROB = Rip Off *****
Reverse cowgirl = girl on top facing away
Reverse massage = you massage her
Russian = penis rubbing between breasts = Pearl Necklace = titty fuck
SC = Strip Club
SF = San Fernando
SO = significant other
SP = Service Provider
spinner = very petite, thin girl
TAMP = Therapeutic Asian Massage Parlor
TG = transgender
TGTBT = too good to be true
TJ = Tijuana
Troll = rude and hideous PL
Trolling = Posting thinly disguised ads in a discussion forum
TOFTT = Take one for the team. In reference to a new, non-reviewed provider.
TS = transexual
TUMA = tongue up my ass
TV = transvestite
VAMP = Vietnamese Asian Massage Parlor
WSW = White Street Walker
WTF = What the fuck?
XOXO = Kisses & Hugs
YMMV = Your mileage may vary. Your service level could be different than reported by others.
Applies to everyone, some more so than others.
1/2 and 1/2 = half and half = oral sex + full service
411 = seeking information
420 = 4:20 = marijuana
69 = two people giving each other oral sex at the same time

If anyone has info on some house brothels with sexy girls let me know. PM me of course.

Ampfinder.

[raybones99]

Look for Frances on Haley as she is a really fun time, great dirty talking too while you're fucking her. I picked her up at about 10:30. Just keep looking and you'll find her as she is out there.