GFE: The BBBJ vs CBJ? (The revised Anon Opus on blowjobs)
Different guys define GFE as differently, but most pretty much agree that a GFE usually involves the illusion of passion, especially during the BJ, and for me that means sans the latex. Keep in mind there are some folks in the hobby that think ANY uncovered activity is insane. I used to be one of them, but I could not lie to myself once I knew the truth that oral sex was not Russian Roulette after all, uncovered blow jobs are frickin' awesome.
Let me whisper a little secret I have learned about humans in general:
[i]Just like there are some guys that love DATY (I mean they like the smell, taste, and texture and get off on the power rush they get from pushing all the right buttons and levers) and some guys can't stand it? Well, there are women out there that love to give blowjobs. Some of them have learned to make money off of the thing they love to do. [/i]
Right about now several providers will chime in and post that they love to give head. If you still believe every post you read, go ahead and just take their word on it. However once you find a gal that genuinely connects with you and actually loves to give oral sex, and you will get a second job to keep those BBBJNQNS coming every few days.
Just like most women can tell the difference when a guy likes to savor their pussy, and others are merely doing what is expected of them, the intuitive male will pick up on whether the passion was an act that was paid for or if it is genuine. Ladies, please do everyone a favor and don't post how much you like giving blow jobs unless it really is true. Some of us consider that a very important part of the GFE.
Yes, there is always the big fat YMMV elephant in the room, but even though it might just be personal energy, or synergy at least, that is shared you can still sense if somebody is having a good time, and sorry but I come down on the side of the GFE aficionados and that is a good GFE involves a great blow job that literally shows a guy you whistle while you work. If you don't care what the woman thinks and believe all blow jobs are the same, you probably quit reading this a paragraph or two ago, so make fun of me and go waste your money on addicts, actresses and grifters.
For those of you that are still reading, here come the apples of gold. I share them with you freely because mongers older and wiser than me took the time and energy to share them with me when I was but a hobby padawan.
There are many reasons a lady might not like oral sex. If it is merely taste and odor, then that is the man's fault. Some wise choices in personal hygiene, grooming, and diet can make your member more inviting and if the lady suggests that your spunk is junk, change your diet and quit smoking, if you even care what they are thinking when they are performing. Cranberry, pineapple, and kiwi have all been medically proven to contain the crucial enzymes and proteins that make for better quality and quantity in the semen factory you think of as your balls.
If the aversion is texture, get over the CIM drive and learn some control or cues from your partner and your will find yourself getting better blowjobs once she relaxes and trusts that you won't splash it anywhere she doesn't want it.
If you are shaking your head, just put yourself in their place for a moment. If you weren't big fan of DATY to begin with, can you imagine your shock if you were with a more orgasmic woman that squirted all in your mouth and all over your face as you did your duty. If that image just caused a gag reflex in your mouth, now you can at least commiserate with the reluctant blowjob.
Some of you just got an erection at the idea of a women squirting while you play with them. First, no the porn you may have come across was not some gag, gimmick, or special effect. All women are anatomically capable of squirting during an orgasm. Not all women choose to do it, or know they can do it. For many the sensation is too much like urination and they tense up and internalize the orgasm out of discomfort or embarrassment—remember since the sensation is similar to a woman, you might be fighting years of potty-training and social norms. No the female ejaculate is not urine. It is actually mostly sucrose and water secreted through the urea hence the reason it feels the same way to a woman. If you want to learn more about how to do this with the lady of your choice you can do a quick search on Google. Don't waste your money though. There are folks out there that will want to sell you a system or video presentation for forty bucks or more. PM me before you click the 'add to cart' button. I can put you in touch with a guy that will sell you the same video for four bucks, for that matter he can get you other porn that isn't so instructional as well, but I digress.
My point here is that just like you get extra horny when a provider has gone to the trouble to be fresh, clean, and as attractive as they can make themselves, they are humans too and the more you give the more you get, and I am not just talking about money.
And for you goofs that are going to itching to post a reply of: 'I pay them to so I don't care what they think, then you have not met a provider that happens to be a woman that loves to give head and likes you enough to be herself as she gobbles your pole. That passion can't be faked.
Sadly, I didn't find this out until I was hobbying-for a long while. Keep in mind I had my first 'dream' right in the middle of the nightmare of AIDS in the early eighties, when people wondered if it was even safe to kiss deeply.
My experiences with civilian BJ's were less than stellar, most likely because they were always covered, even as a teen at the drive-in, you knew you better bring a condom if you wanted to reach third base with the epidemic dominating the headlines. Then later the one uncovered blow job blow job I got from a girlfriend was all teeth and no spit. Then later even my wife at the time, made me cover up for oral sex and admitted after a few months that she HATED the very thought of oral sex.
I sort of figured that all women were really like that-until I splurged one day as a young man and went with professional talent when on a business trip in a city that pretty much winks at everything our city blushes at. I couldn't resist, there were handbills all over the lobby and even in the room that advertised a variety of exotic things I didn't even know about. Because I was born and raised in Porkopolis.
Now, sure I was wet behind the ears and got wrapped up in the illusion of the passion and quickly forgot the price I paid for it, but this was my first experience with a woman that ever approached anything like I saw in porn. I looked down and started doing baseball stats in my head just to make it last longer. I remember looking down as she devoured me and thought: "this woman thinks my dick tastes like chocolate!"
I came a few strokes later and it was a CBJ!
I had an epiphany-forget civilian sex, when you pay for it you ALWAYS get a woman that loves to do this, that's why she is doing it, right? I even got in the habit of even being a nice guy and started buying flavored condoms just for the oral sex. Like I said, wet behind the ears.
Of course, I found myself chasing the dragon. Pretty soon even great blowjobs did little to make me cum. I just chalked it up to me getting older and being a bit more in control, or maybe the talent just wasn't what it used to be. Maybe it was just the novelty of passion, even if it was an illusion I paid for. In reality it was the lack of cover, but I would ran the other direction at the thought of being with somebody you didn't 'love' and being uncovered. I would run twice as fast, if it were a professional back then. Some of you don't remember the covers of Time magazine scaring the hell out of you.
By the way, I would later discover something about those flavored condoms: they are slightly smaller than the regular ones. I don't know if that is intent on the design, or if it is the nature of the flavoring and coloring process, but either way if you are a guy of girth like me, you need a Magnum anyway, putting on one of those flavored condoms could restrict your orgasm. Either way I soon discovered when I didn't have a bright orange tourniquet around my cock, I could actually cum much easier. I can only imagine what orange flavored rubber must taste like anyway.
I didn't learn that little trick until the internet came and some provider shared that info in a post a decade ago. She actually uploaded the photo proof with a ruler and shared her thoughts on flavored vs. Unflavored condoms. Speaking of the internet, you younger folks have no idea how blessed you are. Some of us have been mongering since a Commodore 64 was a fast and expensive personal computer. Some of us can even remember the Radio Shack Trash 80 that came with a cassette tape, and some of us even remember using slotted data punch cards.
Any way, when you used to have to trust a buddy or fellow monger you met at a club for info, or trust the Yellow Pages (If you didn't understand my Commodore 64 metaphor, you probably didn't know hotel rooms used to come standard with this really big book in every room that you had to actually page through to find the location and phone number of a given service or product you wanted, and I am not talking about the one the Gideons put there) or the given city's alternative community paper you could find at most clubs and you literally opened the newsprint up. Turned to the back page (yep, that is where the name of the electronic source many use came from) and read the adult classified section and tried to read between the lines and hope you didn't get cash and dashed, mugged, raped, or had the lovely surprise of a tranny-goat knocking on your hotel door.
The internet changed mongering forever. Pretty soon we were exchanging information and learning about the hobby in a whole new way. When you added instant information and research to the mix, you have a beautiful thing in the pay to play world.
Soon I was reading about this thing they called GFE and there were many heated exchanges over the whole CBJ vs BBBJ and even more initials like CIM or COF or COB, NQNS added to the acronym we used to just know as a plain old BJ.
It took me a while to get the hang of the lingo and how do figure out if a lady was into the same things you were into. My first experience with a BBBJCINQNS was my first professional uncovered blowjob. I think I came in less than a minute. It only happened because the provider I was seeing fairly regularly became comfortable enough with me to ask,"do you mind if we go without the rubber" as I dutifully reached over for the little foil square on the nightstand when things went from frisky to heated,"I'm not really a fan of cherry flavored rubber."
Believe it or not I actually paused and thought about it.
She didn't give me much time to think about it and went right at it. It was incredible. I never felt anything like this wonderful sensation in my life. Then I looked down and the visual of her happily gobbling my cock caused me to surge and I curled my toes and fingers and fought back the urge to cum and worried about the whole CIM thing I had read about.
Should I warn her? Does she know I am ready to cum? Should I just let her go, should I pull out and shoot it someplace other than her mouth. I reached down and lifted her chin. She pulled off and said, 'you've never cum before during a REAL blowjob, have you? '
I grinned sheepishly at her and she returned my look with evil, impish grin.
"Get ready for the ride of your life," she whispered in a husky voice and then she really went to town. I wanted it to last forever, but it was more like forty seconds and I exploded and when I reached down instinctively, she pushed my hands away, deep-throated me and swallowed every drop.
I was hooked.
Little did I know that she was actually the reigning queen of blowjobs in Ohio. If anyone remembers the parties that Always Amy used to throw around Halloween, she was the gal that had the five minute guarantee: "If she could make you cum in five minutes or less, you had to pay her charity $50, which was a pretty good sum back in the day. I think she earned the charity a few thousand dollars during the weekend party; I don't think anyone got a free blowjob from her that weekend.
That was a long time ago. Since then providers have come and gone. Many of them were very talented and it was sad to see them leave, others well to quote a wiser monger here: "well, goodbye and good luck working at Taco Bell."
Keep in mind, there is a great deal of width between the provider that is your ATF and the one that should go back to Taco Bell. My ATFs tend to be oral people, like me. Some people are wired differently. Some actually enjoy oral sex more than regular sex. I have come to respect folks that view this matter from a different vantage than where I am at this moment.
If a lady asks for a cover during oral sex, I will comply without a word of complaint, but it does go into any review I would write, and I won't re-book. BBBJ's are that important to me. I have no problem with tolerating other positions on this issue. In fact, there was great provider that just retired this year that I frequented often. She is from northern Ohio and was known for great blowjobs, so I booked with her. I soon learned why she traveled around the state and always had a full dance card when visiting if you didn't act quick: she gave an awesome blowjob. I booked with her regularly and even drove to the other cities when possible just for that awesome blowjob. The more I saw her, the more I got know her. I started noticing a pattern that she often would excuse herself during oral sex if I came. I finally asked her about it and she confided in me that she loved giving head, but hated the texture of cum. She only did CIM because of the all-important dollar.
Folks, that gave me great pause.
As some of you know it is possible to forge a type of friendship with some of these ladies and when she confided in me, I had a whole new respect for others. This poor girl was often just holding the cum under her tongue until she could sneak away to spit or hide her face as she grimaced and swallowed. To be honest, I would never have noticed her discomfort if I wasn't seeing her several times a month (I had a lot more disposable income back then). I told her that was the last time I would ever cum during oral sex with her. She feared that meant I wasn't booking anymore, but I assured her by paying her in advance (something I never do) for a session the next day and would bring some porn videos with me so we could try to emulate what was done in the videos. That was when we discovered the joys of COF and COB. She was great at giving head. She was so good at it that I went from being a one-shot-on-goal-and-then-I-need-a-nap-and-sandwich kind of guy, to learning the wonderment of multiple shots on goal with her for my first time in my history. As I have noted, I have difficulty cumming, but once I do, I am usually done, but Jenna tutored me in many ways.
She became even better once she started to learn to recognize the cues that a guy was going to cum and could seamlessly let him ejaculate with little or none of it getting past her lips. We had a load of fun (pun intended) practicing our timing. The first few times we missed the beat and told her just to let it fall back out of her mouth. By Jove, I think we discovered something. If you think it is a visual turn-on to watch the moneyshot in porn, just imagine that video being real. Maybe I am weird, but the visual cue of her gobbling me right up until I orgasmed and then pumping my cock with her hands and spraying it everywhere really turned me on. I might like cumming, outside better than inside anyway. She was certainly happier and her blowjobs were already great, once she could relax and feel in control, they became legendary.
Jenna and I started seeing less of each other, as often happens with ATFs just for our own safety and sanity. So I was back out on the market and looking for a new gal that could ring my bell.
Soon I learned to be comfortable with either CIM or COB. If the lady is relaxed it will be better, so if you become a bit more fluid in your hobby boundaries, you might just catch lightning in the bottle for yourself. There were many providers they came and went that had similar stories and skills and learning curves.
Then came Columbus Nicole. If you are still reading this and knew her, there is nothing I need to say. That was the last provider that could pretty much dominate me orally anytime she wanted to, regardless of every tantric breathing trick I tried. I doubt I was the only one that she had that power with. That lady, honest as the day is long, simply loved to suck cock, and she would say it that way. Sadly she moved several states away.
So there is my opus on the GFE and why BBBJ is essential and CIM is a bonus.
Not all agree and that is fine. For me the BBBJ is as important as the money is to most gals. By the way, you do know that some of these ldies are leading second lives just like we are? Some of them got into the hobby by accident. They started as just swingers or maybe looking to connect on an adult side, but then they learn they are pretty damn good at this and they can get paid, and pretty soon you have your Uberwhore. That is a compliment, for those that miss my point. If you are lucky enough your uberwhore, cling to her, she is rare.
This shit of searching for the right gal all over again is worse then dating again, because you. Wait a minute you pay for it one way or another, nevermind.
Maybe I am weird, but I was so desperate I promised a provider I confided in of my current struggle and we arranged a deal that if she could manage to get me to CIM, I would pay her double. She put out a very earnest effort, but still no bang. She worked the way beyond the session, and still no joy in Muddville, I felt so bad, I gave her the bonus anyway. So come early March, when I recharge my hobby funds, I might wait and save up so I can go and see a sure bet.
I've been told that our local porn star, Sydney Thomas, is the woman to call, but I had an allergic reaction to her rates. That would be more than double that bonus I had offered to the lady I was pretty sure could get the job done. So what is a poor guy to do? Pay the premium for the supposed 'sure thing' or keep stumbling around looking for my next ATF. It wouldn't be my first porn star, but I am not sure four videos on Reality Kings makes you a star of enough quality to charge those rates. Now if it were Deidre Holland, I would take out a reverse mortgage. For some of you that is real blast from the past.
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What Is Your Ultimate Fantasy Dream?
If I had to name my ultimate hobby wish, it would be to find just one lady that resembles a cast member from my all time favorite show, Firefly.
I could die happy if I managed a ten hand session!
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Although Ginger Snaps that used to work on the west side of town was darn close to Innara.
Man I would die happy too!
[QUOTE=Anonone; 1435424]If I had to name my ultimate hobby wish, it would be to find just one lady that resembles a cast member from my all time favorite show, Firefly.
I could die happy if I managed a ten hand session!
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Although Ginger Snaps that used to work on the west side of town was darn close to Innara.[/QUOTE]I would die very happy with those girls hands all over me too! My ultimate wish would be to have a 3 or 4 hour session and very romatic rose petals, wine, chocolate, the whole nine yards with both of us leaving very pleased and completely satisfied!
Sometimes livin' in the sicks sucks donkley balz!
All I wan't is a regular provier somewhere between Amelia and Georgetown Ohio. Is that too much to $% ask for?
Trying to call Angie, no answer and voice mail full.
Trying to call Missy, no answer and voice mail full.
I get out of work at 8 and I am in need of a massage and fun afterwards but can't detour through the city to find some.
At this point, she doesn't even have to be a spinner, just HWP and clean.
-BigBird69