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Sugar Baby Guide
Sugar Baby Guide based on my experience with it.
Pros of having a sugar baby vs. Hookers:
The sugar baby girls (ones who aren't really just escorts from STG) are clean, usually drug free and not banging 5 guys a day. Many are college girls but also some are single moms in tough situations financially looking for extra help. They do not consider themselves prostitutes (although they really are. Just more selective ones).
You are usually exclusive with your sugar baby and there's no clock watching, timed appointment expectations and a lot less flakiness. Since you're not just one among many Johns she's seeing, she usually keeps your dates.
You are usually not driving to the hood to meet her and she will be looking a lot hotter and smell good compared to hookers. One I saw lived in a nicer neighborhood than I live in, although she rented a room so didn't own the house. Most are pretty intelligent women and most are more courteous and understanding than hookers because they are not trying to collect a fee and rush you out the door to go buy drugs or see the next John.
Bare back sex is more likely and more importantly, probably less risky! WAY less volume than hookers.
They all seem to accept that men will be older than they are. There's limits to this but after a short time on the site they realize that 21 year old men do not have the financial means to be on the site and become open to guys 15-25 years older than they are.
Cons:
It's expensive and time-consuming compared to normal mongering. Do not enter this thinking you will start a chat today to meet for a $30 BBBJ tomorrow. It's a long process.
Her overall expectations are higher than a hooker's. This is especially true with beginner girls since the sites tell them they will meet millionaires who will pay their college tuition and buy them cars!
She will expect a certain level of commitment from you be it an amount per month or if paying per session she is looking for a certain number of meetings per month. This is because unlike a hooker she hopes you will be her total source of extra income as opposed to trying to lineup as many johns as possible to meet the income goal.
In many cases you will be expected to provide the meeting place-hotel room. Motel 6 may not cut it if she's smokin hot and used to better things in life.
What to expect:
There's always a collection of girls who will mssg. You with intent to sell you pictures or video. I found this hilarious considering pornhub etc. Exist with more porn than a man could ever want for free. You will see them mention an app "cash app". Do yourself a favor and do NOT get that app. I am short and to the point replying to them to get lost.
You'll get immediate friending and mssgs from girls from the Phillipines. Hope I don't have to tell you to not waste your time on them unless you have a trip planned there.
Next there's what was BP girls, now STG, EroticMonkey and CityX girls. Gap-tooth Nicky, Destiny and a few others have been found on these Sugar Baby sites. Their profiles make them sound like real sugar babies. If you don't recognize a pro you'll know you got one because she will cut quickly to a price for a date. Real sugar babies never do this immediate price for sex in a first chat. It will be a higher price than STG too. And by all means if you like her and the deal works for you make the date! But don't be fooled and realize you're back with a drug addict who's had a LOT of pipe laid in that trench. Pay accordingly.
The sites have a collection of attention seeking time wasters and a few scammers. When you see after a few days of chatting that getting to the initial meeting is always met with excuses or "I'm not sure I want to just yet" you have a time waster on your hands. Some are recently joined members who are not quite sure they are ready for the next step. Some are just on the site for the attention of men. Same as that super hot ballbuster at the bar who never has a guy but enjoys shooting down every guy who approaches her. Scammers jump right to asking for money for basically nothing. Use the block feature. NEVER send anyone money! Cash for ass. No exceptions.
The actual sugar baby.
Her ultimate goal is to get the "monthly allowance" with as little expectations from you as possible. You will read this in many profiles and or she will tell you this in chat. She will ask for way more than you'd possibly want to spend and she will try to get you to agree to as few meetings as possible in exchange for it. My advice here is don't do the monthly allowance. Trust me, few guys are agreeing to this in spite of the bullshit story she'll tell you about her "last sugar daddy". I have many chat logs and to read most of them you'd think all the previous sugar daddies were super rich and paying her $3,000 a month to see her 2 x. It's not true! There's also many, probably due to the lies the website tells them about the men they will meet here, that think there's tons of guys willing to pay $500 for her to accompany you to lavish events. Arm candy. I do not believe there's any guys in GR on the site paying for arm candy but anyway be aware of this expectation.
Establish you will pay per meeting. State "hotel room meeting" so she knows you mean sex, not a lunch / Dinner / event date. This leads me to another related point, some girls are expecting payment in a non-sexual arrangement! Some claim they've had prior sugar daddies who paid them for simply eating a dinner out with them etc. This is beyond bullshit and a lie. We men are all about the same. No guy is on these sites for a plutanic arrangement. That said, if her profile states this or she says this in chat just move on. The process of getting a sugar baby is long enough when the girl knows she has to put out. You will waste a ton more time trying to convince the naive girl that she should change her goals and expectations.
Getting started:
Make a profile. Put some meaningful things in it like what you seek and something interesting about you; hobbies, likes, whatever. Include photo (s). If you're trying to stay under the radar make them headless, but don't go with no pics. Many girls ignore guys with no pics. They care what you look like. They basically want a decent looking guy who will also pay up.
If you list yourself as married most girls will ignore you. Not all, but most. Obvious exception is the married women. There's not many of them. Sorry to tell you and no offense, but if you list your occupation as landscaper, truck driver or really anything blue-collar you have lowered your success rate a ton. These girls upon signing up on the site are sold on the fact they will meet successful, wealthy, generous men. While you could be earning a six figure income driving a truck her perception is based on TV and the ads for the website, not on your actual ability to pay her.
Note that new signups on most sites move you to the top of the search results so in the beginning you will receive more attention without doing anything to initiate it.
Your initial goal is to strike up a convo, trade cell #s (so if you quit the site or don't renew you still have contacts) and try to set a simple coffee or lunch meeting. Do NOT send her a pic of your cock or ask her for a titty pic! And to those of you morons who do this, the girls hate this and it kills your chances. Thereby making me look all the better! Be a gentleman. This is not BP! These girls view their side of this as more like friends with benefits than prostitution. You are courting her, not offering $40 for a BBBJ. The coffee meeting is to establish you two mesh. It's really more for her than for you because most of them care about compatibility. You should pretend you care about this too even if you don't. They view this as if seeking a boyfriend so, unlike a BP girl, the fact you'll spend money is not enough to achieve success. The sticky point here is to decide if you will pay her a fee just for this initial meeting. I refuse to. I admit I've lost quite a few initial meetings over this but I am not paying some girl $50-$100 (some expected more!) to simply have coffee or eat a lunch I am paying for.
At this initial meeting you are courting her like you do a potential girlfriend. Be charming. Pay for the meal. Ask her questions about her life and interests. What's her major in college. If she's interested in setting a date or arrangement SHE will bring this up, trust me. And it will cut right to the money part. "I usually get $500 per meeting" or "my last daddy paid me $3,000 a month allowance for 1-2 short meetings a month" is not uncommon to hear. 99% of the time I know its a complete lie but I now start negotiating. By the time you've met you should have already established you expect an arrangement involving "friends with benefits" or "intimacy". Avoid saying sex. Keep it classy. The girls call your date and your relationship a "meeting" or "arrangement" usually as well. No hooker lingo is used.
The super hot college girls are getting a lot of attention and have insane high expectations. Many also have links to gofundme or cashhapp on their profiles suggesting you just send them money for nothing. Many will not have sex with you at any price. All that said, I still take a crack at them and am in an arrangement that's run 10 months now with a 19 year old college girl. But I had a ton of attempts ending nowhere before her.
There's also a slew of mid 20's pros who will do one time dates but expect 350-500 and as soon as you offer less they have no interest. They are using the site like BP but are not listed on regular pro sites. If you can afford this per visit many are very, very hot girls.
The married women on the site I personally avoid. Too much risk of a jealous husband getting involved for me to risk it. If you're ok with that added danger they are as eager to fuck as they are to get paid.
There's a few who are into BDSM. My experience is they only want you if you are as well. They are also very selective and care about your looks and age.
By far the easiest success you will have will be with single mothers who live in rural areas not close to a big city. Most guys won't drive far to see them. For them I forgo the initial coffee meeting usually and chat for days / weeks instead leading to an encounter. Also women older than 30 are easier to get started with. They have far less success on the sites because they are competing with 20 year old hotties in college. Being single moms they always host saving me the motel bill as well. They are usually in tough situations and in my opinion actually need the money more than the college girls do. I've bought clothes for their kids a couple times even. With them sometimes drugs can be present but I've avoided those.
I drove 2.5 hours to see a young single mom once. Bar none the hottest girl I've ever been with in my entire life! Blond hair, blue eyes, beautiful face, killer ass, nice firm B cups. A goddess. Cost was 250 in her apartment. I can't make that drive or pay that rate often but wow, what a memory!
Some other pluses to sugar babies:
Most are low mileage and have not slept with 100 guys the past 6-months like the pros we usually see. She's usually drug and disease free and expects you to be too.
Within reason there's no timer to encounters. Its more like when you had a girlfriend and got together. Shortest stay is usually about 2 hours. Less is because "I" have to go, not that she said "time's up".
If you buy lingerie she will wear it for you.
I've paid as high as 250 for an intimate meeting and as low as 50. And the girl for 50 was 19, in college and not ugly. She does everything but anal, wears the lingerie I bought her, talks dirty in the bedroom and swallows every drop! The 250 is my personal limit. If you're willing to pay more it will greatly expand your success rate. 350 opens up a lot of possibilities, but is just too much for me to pay personally.
If you're willing to pay 350-500 a session you will have many, many hot choices on the sites but remember to court her! Dress nice, smell nice, be respectful like you would be to a potential girlfriend.
Other tips:
Do not give personal info. Or Facebook pages out. If you're not single this hobby has extra danger compared to classic escorts as they communicate like you're a boyfriend and have no boundaries. Not a single girl I've seen knows even my first name, much less where I live and work other than Grand Rapids area. But most ask a lot of personal questions so be prepared.
Use a hobby phone! Again, these are not pros! They will initiate a call or text and think nothing of it. You are not a john to them. You are a friend with benefits.
It's a LONG process to get an arrangement. Be patient. You will send chat requests / initial chats to 100 girls to get 15-20 replies. Of the 15 replies 8 will chat again with you later. Of the 8, 3-5 MIGHT agree to meet you for coffee. 1-2 of those will no show / no call for that meeting. If you will pay her for meeting you your odds may be better than what I listed but I refuse to pay her to meet me for coffee.
If you drive an old car or look shabby, unshaven, smell bad or wear clothes you'd wear to do yard work you will have little success in this. These girls seek a man of means. You have to at least appear like you have money.
If you're unattractive, very overweight or very old you have an uphill battle. Unlike hookers, many girls on these sites want a guy they would have as a boyfriend but a little older and he pays them. And the hotter ones are VERY selective.
Read the girl's profile and reference in chat something in it you have in common or agree with. Otherwise you just seem like a hound dog who looked at her pics and nothing else.
If you're not rich, say so! I put right in my profile that I'm not wealthy but make a good living and am financially secure. This for me is to avoid wasting time with the mercenary gold diggers. And these sites are prime places for gold diggers.
Do not prepay for anything! Period! No PayPal, no Cash app no GoFundMe. The payment part should be the same as you follow for escorts. Service = payment.
Most girls expect you to be exclusive with them. If you are not going to be I suggest you lie about that. I lost many, many chances prior to a first meeting by being honest about it.
If the site search has distance ranges expand it to cover as far as you would drive. As said above, girls in rural areas are easier to hookup with. Also, MSU in Lansing has a large amount of sugar babies listed. If you'l drive to Lansing and can afford the high price they want its like heaven on earth.
If you can, get things in place where she contacts you to suggest getting together after your first intimate meeting. I was in most cases able to keep myself from being the one to suggest our next meeting. Partially because I pay per meeting so she has an incentive to want to see me again, and partially because I'm patient. Why you may ask? Because it keeps the balance of power with you. If you are always bugging her to hookup she knows you will probably be ok paying more. This overall concept came in to play when one of my sugar babies asked to setup a meeting and then suggested I pay more. I told her sorry money's a little tight right now. Take the agreed rate or leave it. She took it. If I had instead been the one trying for the meeting the dynamic would be different.
On the other hand if you have a well established arrangement going giving her a small gift or helping out with Christmas for her kids or whatever can go a long way to cementing things with her. Plus if its presents or clothes for her kids you are being a decent person at least. MUCH different than paying extra to an escort who will simply buy more drugs.
If you're gunning for bareback sex its a maybe, so bring condoms! She's not a pro and will not have any. When things begin take a shot at not mentioning condoms and see if she lets you continue. IF she stops you for protection say "Oh yea sorry, there in my jacket" or whatever. So far every sugar baby I had did BBBJ. Only half allowed BBfull service. Only a few allowed CIM. Do NOT ask about this in advance unless CIM is a deal breaker for you. Asking them this will get you labeled a gross perv. And kill your chances of a meeting.
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[QUOTE=Monger01;3962714]Sugar Baby Guide based on my experience with it...
...Asking them this will get you labeled a gross perv. And kill your chances of a meeting.[/QUOTE]Thanks for the fantastic guide. I am considering this option and you have laid down some great pointers. What are the expectations from these ladies regarding long term arrangements?
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[QUOTE=JaneMan1;3972297]Thanks for the fantastic guide. I am considering this option and you have laid down some great pointers. What are the expectations from these ladies regarding long term arrangements?[/QUOTE]You would be well served by reading the Richmond VA SB thread and archive thereof. It is a true national treasure.
I have sugared in Grand Rapids once, I met an eastern girl, a little pudgy but very pretty. Took her to a nice dinner downtown, across the street to my hotel for FC, damage $250. I have some reason to be back there again, but haven't been observing the local girls in a long time.
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What do you mean exactly? The whole deal boils down to payment per session.
My current SB is more lenient after so many months now allowing me to pay less occasionally. Early on not so much.
[QUOTE=JaneMan1;3972297]Thanks for the fantastic guide. I am considering this option and you have laid down some great pointers. What are the expectations from these ladies regarding long term arrangements?[/QUOTE]
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Married or single
[QUOTE=Monger01;3962714]Sugar Baby Guide based on my experience with it.
If you list yourself as married most girls will ignore you. Not all, but most. Obvious exception is the married women. There's not many of them.
[/QUOTE]Thanks for this very thorough post. I think it's perfect for people looking to get started with SBs or it might tell some what they are doing wrong. It lines up with my experience for the most part. However, I do indicate that I am married and have not found it to be too much of an issue. Yes, there are some that ignore me, or they even list in their profile that they don't want to be contacted by married men, but there are plenty that don't care. I've even had several tell me that they prefer married men. Usually the stated reason is that they are less likely to be clingy. I used to think my age and marital status improved the chances for bareback (based on a few comments from women), but my actual experience doesn't support that. For me it's been about 33% (out of 30+) so that seems consistent with your experience. Others have reported 50%.
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Yea I read those posts before I started.
[QUOTE=FarFarAway;3972360]You would be well served by reading the Richmond VA SB thread and archive thereof. It is a true national treasure.
I have sugared in Grand Rapids once, I met an eastern girl, a little pudgy but very pretty. Took her to a nice dinner downtown, across the street to my hotel for FC, damage $250. I have some reason to be back there again, but haven't been observing the local girls in a long time.[/QUOTE]
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Thanks for the input. I'm not an expert. Just sharing my experience with it.
[QUOTE=FCooper;3973911]Thanks for this very thorough post. I think it's perfect for people looking to get started with SBs or it might tell some what they are doing wrong. It lines up with my experience for the most part. However, I do indicate that I am married and have not found it to be too much of an issue. Yes, there are some that ignore me, or they even list in their profile that they don't want to be contacted by married men, but there are plenty that don't care. I've even had several tell me that they prefer married men. Usually the stated reason is that they are less likely to be clingy. I used to think my age and marital status improved the chances for bareback (based on a few comments from women), but my actual experience doesn't support that. For me it's been about 33% (out of 30+) so that seems consistent with your experience. Others have reported 50%.[/QUOTE]
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[QUOTE=Monger01;3973933]Thanks for the input. I'm not an expert. Just sharing my experience with it.[/QUOTE]Which site (s) are you using?
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Seeking arangement.
[QUOTE=Blackfire;3976893]Which site (s) are you using?[/QUOTE]
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Seeking Arrangement
[QUOTE=Monger01;3977290]Seeking arangement.[/QUOTE]I've been on SA for about four years. I can't believe what it has done for my sex life. The comment about the process being time consuming is very true. It's easy to spend a lot of time on the site, and the girls who are worth getting usually require some time. Still, I've had short-term and long-term arrangements with girls from their late teens to early thirties (most in early twenties) who are girls I would have been very happy to date in my single days. I'm now in my mid-60's, and although it's true that lots of girls want someone younger, I have been very surprised how many are totally fine with someone my age. The last few years have been the "golden age" for my sex life.
Between my age and being married, I think there's a certain "safety" element for the girls, both in terms of physical safety and of potential concerns over the guy's getting "clingy," as mentioned before. I've tended to shy away from women over 35 (and usually over 30), because I'm concerned that older women might think that I was actually a candidate for an IRL relationship. It may also be that younger girls are fine with getting together with me because I can only meet discreetly (I. E. , either a hotel or their place). So, they don't have to worry about what it looks like to show up at a restaurant with a guy who is old enough to be their grandfather. On the other hand, some girls want fine dining, nightlife, and travel, and they are thus outside my pool of potentials.
As for bareback, I've mostly avoided that, although I've done it with a few, including one I saw for almost two years. I would never engage in bareback with one of the young mother types mentioned in the original post. I'd be less concerned about STDs than about pregnancy. Most of these young mothers are hurting for money because they typically get little child support from the father and tend to have not very lucrative jobs. It would be highly rational of them to get pregnant again by a man with deep enough pockets to support the whole family. One girl I met with several times seemed overly interested in the contents of a condom that I had thrown in the trash. Now, they all go down the toilet.
Used wisely, SA is a fabulous resource.
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Buyers market
As if my post wasn't long enough already, I actually left out something I intended to include.
I read a few places back when I started that the girls greatly outnumber the guys particularly on SA. Couple that with the fact, according to the girls, many guys can't afford it or send them dick pics or are crude to them and you will realize you have the upperhand if you're courteous and serious about making connections. This is the opposite of the current situation on stg where I can count less real pros (not counting cc scams and fakes) than I count mongers active on usasg right here.
I used this to my advantage to get lower rates knowing the girls were not getting too many offers. They come on strong at first but many relented after time passed. Confirming for me that if they wanted paid they had to accept my lower offer.
I saw quite a few for under 200 a visit. Multihour mosg. I had a few including current sb that I pay 65 a visit FS bareback and swallows. We started off higher but when I said I was done as I couldn't keep paying she quickly agreed to lower. I've managed 50 a few times even.
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Monger1
That was a great summary and advice regarding SB's. My experiences have been down South but by and large the same as what you described. I prefer using an SB site more than anything other way of meeting ladies.
I've also been fed those lines the ladies use about what their "last sugar daddy" used to do. Once had one tell me her last one used to give her $1000+ per meeting. I just blew it off, figured if that kind of $ was available to her she wouldn't be talking to me or anyone else. I ended up meeting with her several times for nowhere near that kind of money. I agree completely about the "x dollars per meeting" being the norm. I agree too that if a person acts like a gentleman he can gain some lasting relationships / friendships. I just spent the weekend with one of mine. Anyway thanks again for the post and other information you've given to this site.
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Monger
Thanks for the SB info. I am about ready to dip my toe in the water. This guide will help.
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Scam example
This is a good example of a scammer on SA. View his text pics.
Titled Sugarpants420 in the thread.
[URL]http://www.usasexguide.nl/forum/showthread.php?13727-Non-Pros-UTR-SBs&p=4008877&viewfull=1#post4008877.[/url]
He handled her well.
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[QUOTE=Wolverines;4001241]Thanks for the SB info. I am about ready to dip my toe in the water. This guide will help.[/QUOTE]Extensive information is available on the Richmond, VA sugar thread, and the archive of posts made on it over the years. It is the de facto national thread for SDs.